Today I broke down a front of my friends.It was the first time they ever saw me crying.I can't deal with what's happened at home.My grandpa is sick and that's all I am going to say about.I can't deal with the fact that he won't have his old life back how it used to be.Now I feel like all he is doing is waiting for death to get him.I wish he could live his life before I hate it when he tells me when he is okay when i know he not okay.My life is falling a apart I got no one to talk about it with anyone.I feel like no on will understand what I am going through people don't ask what's happening with me anymore.No one ask me what's going on with my family.I only told 4 people what's going on with me but I only told 2 the whole story.This people saw that I wanted to cry but I did not I hold it inside of me.But this afternoon I couldn't hold it anymore I cried and I couldn't stop crying.Why can't I just die bc either way if I stay alive I will see everyone else die.I hit rock bottom and I am not going to deal with anyone's bullshit anymore.I have enough bullshit with mine and I don't want to deal with fake friends people who talk shit.All I want is to die bc then I will be in peace.I cry every time I remember what's going on with my grandpa.If you actually care about me and want to know what's going on with my grandpa then text me or send me a message through this app.I think that's all I can say so that I can calm down.
