Long time, no laugh! I know! I'm sorry!
But I'm back with more jokes so ya'know... ... ...
Well ummm... happy reading?
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1- The phone rings at the FBI headquarters. "Hello?"
"Hello, is this FBI?"
"Yes. What do you want?"
"I'm calling to report my neighbor Tom. He is hiding marijuana in his firewood."
"This will be noted."
Next day, the FBI comes over to Tom's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept, break every piece of wood, find no marijuana, swear at Tom and leave.
The phone rings at Tom's house. "Hey, Tom! Did the FBI come?"
"Yeah!"
"Did they chop your firewood?"
"Yeah they did."
"Okay, now it's your turn to call. I need my garden plowed."
2- A first grade teacher explained to her class that she is a liberal Democrat. She asks her students to raise their hands if they were liberal Democrats, too. Not really knowing what a liberal Democrat was, but wanting to be like their teacher, their hands flew up into the air.
There was one exception. A girl named Lucy had not gone along with the crowd. The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different. "Because I'm not a liberal Democrat."
"Then," asks the teacher, "What are you?"
"Why I'm a proud conservative Republican," boasts the little girl. The teacher, a little perturbed and her face slightly red, asked Lucy why she is a conservative Republican.
"Well, I was brought up to trust in myself instead of relying on an intrusive government to care for me and do all of my thinking. My Dad and Mom are conservative Republicans, and I am a conservative Republican too."
The teacher, now angry, loudly says, "That's no reason! What if your Mom was a moron, and your dad was a moron? What would you be then?" The teacher paused and smiled.
"Then," Lucy said, "I'd be a liberal Democrat."
3- A bus filled with politicians was driving through the countryside one day, on the campaign ail. The bus driver,
caught up in the beautiful scenery, loses control and crashes into the ditch.
A farmer living nearby hears the horrible crash and rushes out to discover the wreckage. Finding the politicians he buries them.
The next day, the police come to the farm to question the man. "So you buried all the politicians?" asked the police officer. "Were they all dead?"
The farmer answered, "Some said they weren't, but you know how politicians lie."
4- "You should be ashamed,"a father told his son, "When Abraham Lincoln was your age, he used to walk ten miles every day to get to school."
"Really?" Replied the son. "Well when he was your age, he was president."
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Jokes for when you are bored!
ComédieI will try my best to entertain you but can't guarantee satisfaction. Please remember that some jokes are about blondes and others may be sightly racist and stuff like that!!! I didn't make these jokes up! They are from other books, apps, people and...
