Jewels to Forever

CHAPTER ELEVEN

The familiarity was quite overwhelming. Sarah stared hard at the beauty. How did Muhammad possess this much picture of big Sarah? It looked like that part of the drawer was specially dedicated to the memory of Sarah.

The pictures ranged from unawares, confusion, shyness, happiness, excitement to anger, sadness. Sarah stared hard at a particular picture. Muhammad was extremely close to Sarah and he was clearly whispering something in her ear making the lady blush, her peach coloured scarf over her mouth, hazel eyes crinkled at the corner. It was wrong, but Sarah couldn't help but be jealous. The girl was dead and she didn't know why she felt betrayed.

A gasp escaped her lips as she went through the lots of pictures now laying on her lap. Her shaky fingers held that one picture that spiked so much jealousy and anger in her. It was obvious that the two of them were in love. Was their love stronger than what she and Muhammad have now? Her hands tugged at the root of her hair. Tears fell down her face. Why did he hide this much from her? Did he still love big Sarah? As she stared at the drawer before her, lost in thought, her mind wandered off to a thought so dangerous. What if?

   When Muhammad came home that night, after a terrible deal, he didn't expect to see his office in a horrible state. He had completely forgotten the secret he harboured in the drawer he had asked Sarah to search for his documents. A very emotional Sarah sat quietly on his desk, tears running down her face and snot down her nose. He frowned.
"What's going on?" He calmly approached her, dropping his suitcase on the floor. Muhammad's eyes widened at the intensity of the glare she gave him.

"What's going on?" She repeated the question. "What's this?" She spat, throwing the pictures at him. Muhammad stared at one of the pictures, the cherubic face and beautiful smile. It broke the serenity on his face. After all these years, he still couldn't forget her.

"What is big Sarah's pictures doing in your drawer?" She yelled out, glaring immensely at him.
  Muhammad stayed put. He couldn't answer. Maybe it was because he still missed her, holding dearly unto their memories. Maybe he was waiting to wake up and her death being a dream. He still loved her as she had the biggest portion of his heart but he also loved Sarah if it was possible.

"Muhammad. Answer me." Sarah snapped. He had never seen her this mad.  Her body was raking with sobs.
"Do you love her?"
  He stared at her face. He didn't understand why he was frozen to his spot. Why didn't he feel anything even as his pregnant wife yelled and cried?
"Sarah I.. "

"Don't call my name." She whispered as she got off the desk. "I don't even know why I'm crying." She said to herself as she wiped away her tears.

"Sarah..."

"It hurts okay. Don't call that name." She begged quietly. "You loved her uhn?"

"I did." Muhammad bowed his head.

"It's not wrong. I mean everyone has their first love right?" Her laughter came out short and harsh. "But I have a question." She smiled a lopsided smile.

"Sarah.."

"Why did you approach me first? Were you really interested in me? Be honest please." She interrupted.

"Sarah.."

"Or i was just someone to get your mind off of her. Lucky you, I beared the same name as her."

"Look. That's not it."

"Did you even love me? Did you care at all?" She suddenly asked staring at his handsome face. A pained look crossed his features and Sarah swallowed hard as a fat roll of tears glided down her cheeks. She sucked in air and exhaled loudly, nodding her head in understanding. "I get it." She turned to leave.