Dip$hits in Space, season 1

Episode 4: The Duffy

Uka shook her head in disbelief.

"I can't believe the universe provided." She sighed as a nearly giddy Captain Lawg hastily steered his way through the debris field towards a stray floating chunk of fiberglass and tubing.

"I've never been so happy! It's a D600! Oscilating turbo-jets, quick-change filtering unit. This puppy has a fading illuminating system and sea-foam green topcoat. Look at her, not even a chip. A little polishing compound and a fuse or two and she'll purr like a chicken." Lawg barked

"Kitten, you dip-Lawg. Chicken is a food animal. Kittens purr." corrected Uka.

"And how would you know?"

"Even I know that much, we had chicken a week ago at spaceport 7-11. It was good but it tasted just like mandorian owl, and caloric sand snakes. Basically it just tasted like everything. I was disappointed." She sighed. Lawg just dismissed it. He had a prize.

"Well prepare your asses for pant-shitting excitement. We just scored ourselves the best find of the decade." He said gently backing up to the tub so Marley could snag it and pull it into the cargo bay. Uka threw her hands up.

"You said that about the case of sparklers we found 3 days ago. You set the hull on fire. I didn't know aluminum hulls could burn. Please don't set the hot-tub on fire." She begged.

"Oh no I learned my lessons. Sparklers in an oxygen-rich enclosed atmosphere is bad, from now on I stick exclusively to Jupiter screamers and boom-crackers, and they will NOT be set off anywhere near the new tub. Cargo bay only."

"It didn't help that you decided to set them off on the wooden front porch. Only you would have a wooden structure in a spaceship." Marley noted.

"I rubbed it down with duracoat so it wouldn't get dry and splintery."

"Duracoat is flammable!! You nearly killed us all with the fumes. There is a reason aerosols are banned on starships." he reminded.

"We need another crewman." sighed Uka.

"Why?" asked Lawg.

"I can't sleep, there is too much to do for 2 people and frankly some of the things are just beyond the skills of a space-bunny and reluctant stowaway."

"Yes, but we don't have any way of paying. Professional crewmen are expensive, we can't keep an android working even if they weren't so expensive." He shrugged.

"Maybe we can hire another woman." she suggested.

"Good point, I'll make some fliers." Marley said darting up and running to the kitchen for some paper.

The boys sat elbows down on a plastic tabletop watching most of the people on the space-station pass them by.

He yawned, noticing Marley was dead-asleep.

"Wake up furrball. If I have to sit here and be awake, so do you...unless you wanna help Uka with the cargo."

"I'm awake, who did we get?" he asked.

"Nobody so far." He said as people walked by their table as if it wasn't there. He looked down and noticed a Resume on his hand.

"I must have dozed off for a second too. Looks like we have someone interested." He said rubbing his eyes.

"Anything good?" Marley asked.

"We may have a winner." He said with a smirk.

"Considering we have one contestant, I'd say so. I bet the sign details didn't help. Why are we advertizing that we can't pay?" he asked.