SnowBaz Oneshots

Normal Is Boring

*Simon's POV*

"Do you think we are good together?" I ask quietly as Baz and I lay together in our bed.

His hand, which was previously playing with my curls, suddenly freezes and I feel Baz tense beneath me. "What?" Is all he says.

I lift my head from his chest and stare at his almost horror-struck face. His silver eyes are wide, and his already pale face is somehow whiter. I can see the confusion and hurt behind his eyes. Even still, he looks beautiful. He always does.

"Do you think we are good together? Like as a couple, do you think we work well together?" I ask again, trying my best to not sound rude. I didn't mean for this to be a fight, I just wanted his opinion on us.

Baz always tells me how much he loves me, and don't get me wrong, I believe him. He has shown me many, many times how much I mean to him. And I love him just as much, if not more. He is my everything. My life.

But just because we love each other, doesn't mean us as individuals are good. We argue almost everyday, even though it's always resolved within the hour or so. Our personalities are total opposite. He is cool, collected, confident. Able to set his mind to something, and accomplish it perfectly. I, however, can barely cook a meal without any help. I'm always fidgeting, confused, and helpless. We never really hang out together. Of course, we go on dates. We live together, as well as share a bed. But we never hang out to just hang out. We don't go out unless its door a date or anniversary. We don't have hilarious inside jokes, or deep conversations about life and its happenings. If we are ever bored, we go out, but separately. Baz will go to the theatre or the library, or call Niall and Dec to go to a bar. I will go to the cafe, park, or call Penny to binge watch our favourite television shows. We don't seem to ever do things that don't involve relationship things.

I don't know why I'm even thinking of all of this. I know there is love in our relationship, which should be the most important thing. But...I want more. I don't want to just be Baz's boyfriend, I want to be his friend. Someone he likes. Someone he can hang out with, without relying on the boyfriend aspect to keep us together.
It might be selfish, but I don't want is to grow apart. I'm afraid that if we keep things how they are, then one day we won't be able to repair a broken relationship.

"Simon, Love, what are you talking about? Of course we are good together! I love you! If we weren't anything but perfect together, then how would we be here? You love me, right? And I know I love you, so of course we are good." Baz says, shaking me out of my thoughts.

"That's just it, Baz." I say sitting up, positioning myself beside Baz with my back against the headboard. Baz scoots up to sit the same way. I watch as he sits there, waiting for me to continue, explain.

I take his hand and hold it in my lap. I know that I was the one to start this conversation, but now that's it's happening, I'm scared of how Baz will react. I don't want him to be mad. Or think that I don't love him, because Crowley I adore this man. I just want him to see what I do.

"Baz, I love you. And I know you love me. But do you like me?" I try to start, only to get interrupted by my love.

"Of course I like you! We've been together for almost a year, Simon!" Baz almost yells. His frustration starts to rise. With the hand I'm not holding, he starts to run through his hair, causing it to go up in spikes. I want to reach out and smooth it out again, but I know he won't let me.

Instead, I try again to explain what I'm thinking. "No, that's not what I meant. I want to know if you like me, not as a boyfriend, but as a person. If we weren't together, would you still hang out with me? Because, I honestly don't think that if it weren't for us being boyfriends, we wouldn't even wave goodbye to each other. I love you so much, Darling. But I want to be your friend, as well as your partner. I want to go out with you just to have fun, and not to have a reason."

As soon as I finish my rant, my eyes watering, Baz smashes his lips to mine. I can feel his tears mixing with mine, but ignore them. I'm too focused on the wonderful feeling of his cool, soft lips on my chapped ones. However, eventually we do pull away, only a little, to breathe.

"I'm sorry, Love. I'm so sorry." Baz whispers to me. All I do is shake my head. He has no reason to apologize. It's not his fault, it's just something we never we got around to doing. We went straight from hating each other, to loving each other. There was no time to form a friendship in the middle of it all. But now, we have time. We can stop just being partners, but partners for life, in every way.

All the sudden Baz starts to laugh, just a small chuckle and shake of shoulders. I pull back away from him more and stare at him in confusion.

"Oh, Simon. We really did this all wrong, didn't we? The first time we met, we immediately hated one another. Then one day, it switched to the total opposite and we were in love. And now we can work on being friends. All out of order." Baz explains after composing himself.

I smile at him. He is right, but I don't mind at all. I wouldn't change how we got here in any way. So what if we didn't do things the 'normal' way? All I care is that I love this amazing man, and have him in my life forever. Normal is boring, anyways.