⚠️WARNING⚠️Contains self harm⚠️
Y/n pov:
It helps I tell myself. Of course it helps. If it stops the pain in my heart and my head then surely it helps. Even if it's only temporary. It takes away my emotional pain and transfers it into physical pain.
I pulled up my sleeve, observing the scars already there, looking at how the fresh cuts are healing. Not very well it seems, oh well, no one really gives a shit anyway. This wrist looks a mess. Let's have a look on the other. I pulled up the hoodie sleeve on my right arm and looked at it. This wrist is so perfect. No scars, no fresh cuts. Perfect, just like it was before Mum and Dad died. I miss them so much that sometimes I consider joining them, yano? But they'd be so disappointed in me for giving up so easy. I pulled open my bathroom draw and grabbed a razor. I probably shouldn't but I need it, I need some soothing. Just as the razor was about to pierce my skin, I heard something.
*Knock knock*
The fuck? Who knocks on my door at this time? Wait what time is it? I grab my phone and look at the time. Oh, it's 1pm, makes sense.
*Knock knock*
Impatient twat, give me a sec. I scrabbled up off the floor, put my razor in the drawer, and ran down the stairs to the door.
I opened it to reveal this short kid. I mean taller than me but still short. He was fiddling with his fingers, obviously nervous and he looked up at me, then his eyes widened? Wtf whys he looking shocked? Scared? God I don't understand people. I followed his eyes. Oh fuck. I quickly pulled my sleeves down and looked at him.
"What do you want?" I snapped. "If you're selling cookies, piss off."
He took a step back, obviously shocked at the fact I just snapped at him. "I can come back another time, if you were busy, or if I interrupted something." He quietly said.
"No, it's fine. What did you need?" I asked, my voice a bit calmer this time, feeling kinda guilty that I scared him.
"Well I just moved in next door and ...." He started. He continued on, did he think I was listening? Because I have no clue whatsoever what he's saying, and quite honestly, I don't give two shits. I zoned back in when he said, "So I was wondering if you wanted to be friends?"
"Urm," I said scratching the back of my neck. "Can you start again, but like be brief because I wasn't really listening?" I awkwardly asked.
"Sure, well I moved in, Mum told me about you, so I came round to see if you want to be friends?" He said, more of a question that a statement. "You get it that time?" He laughed.
"Yes, I got it." I fake smiled for a few seconds and then I dropped it before saying, "But no, I don't do friends." I started to close the door but he stopped me from closing it properly with his foot.
"Wait," he said quickly.
"What now?" I grumbled.
"Think about it." He said quickly again.
"Think about what?" I asked.
"Being friends with me," he said before removing his foot and walked off to god knows where.Would it be good for me? No. If I have friends, I have to pretend. Pretend it doesn't hurt everyday. Pretend I'm happy all the time. Pretend that my parents didn't just leave me after some stupid plane crash. Pretend I don't live in this house alone.
I went up to my room and sat on my bed. I let the seconds, the minutes, the hours, and the days drift by. Staring into space. Eating the odd few snacks in my room. I couldn't afford to buy anything. Actually that's a lie. I can afford to go and buy stuff. My parents were rich. I just don't want to.
*Knock knock*
Great. I bet it's that short guy again. I don't even know his name. I don't want to either. If I know his name, it means something and I can't have anyone meaning anything to me.
*Knock knock*
There he goes again. Impatient asshole. I dragged myself out of bed, not giving two shits what I looked like or what I was wearing and went downstairs and opened the door. Why do I feel really dizzy? I can't see anything. What's happening? I'm falling, that's not good.I woke up on a sofa. Whose sofa is this? This isn't mine. Where am I? I sat up really quick and immediately fell back down on the sofa. Then someone immediately came rushing over. Great, it's short guy again.
"What happened?" I groaned.
"Well you passed out, I didn't really know what to do so I carried you here and let you stay on the sofa until you woke up." He said, still nervous.
"Thanks I guess, can I leave now?" I asked standing up and walking towards the door. He grabbed my wrist and I noticeably flinched. He immediately let go and apologised.
"At least eat something first." He requested.
"Fine, but I'm not eating here. I'm eating at my house." I stated firmly, but nervously.
"Okay," he said happily before walking to mine with me.
We got to mine and I reluctantly let him in. No one but me has been in this house for 6 weeks. "What are we eating?" He asked as he walked into my kitchen.
"Can we order something in?" I said quickly, before he began opening my cupboards to find them empty. I'd have to answer questions then.
"Sure, what would you like?" He asked politely.
"You choose." I bluntly stated. "I'll eat anything." I mean I wouldn't usually but I want him to leave me alone so I guess I have to.
He ordered pizza, he got one so that we could share, a Hawaiian I think he said. I wasn't paying attention to him again. He just doesn't interest me. No one does. I snapped out of my thoughts when he was waving his hand in front of my face.
"Oh, sorry, were you saying something?" I politely apologised. God I hate hanging with people, if this is what hanging is.
"Yeah, but it doesn't matter. What's your name? You never told me." He asked, staring at me intently.
I looked at the ground and whispered, "Y/n, Y/n Hossler."
"Oh my, are you related to Jaden Hossler?" He excitedly asked.
I looked up at him, "He's my brother, but he lives in LA like you probably already know. We don't talk anymore." I said looking back down afterwards.
He didn't respond, just got up and opened the door once he heard the doorbell and paid for the food.
"I would've paid half, you know?" I offered.
"You shouldn't have to pay for something you don't actually want." He told me, not looking at me. He sat down and we began eating the pizza. I only ate 3 slices which is probably the most I've eaten in the 6 weeks I've been alone in the world.Once we'd finished the pizza, the short guy got up and put the box in the bin. He turned around and said he had to go. He handed me a piece of paper and left.
It read: 'Hey y/n, I know we've just met, but I want to be your friend. I don't have any friends here, I left them in Florida. Anyway, here's my number: ********. Please message me - Kairi :)'Oh so his names Kairi. Now he's supposed to mean something. Great. What the fuck am I supposed to do? I told him my name hoping he'd piss off. But nooo, he didn't. I ate hoping he'd piss off. But nooo, he didn't. Great. Such a clingy arsehole.
End of pov.
A/n
Word count - 1361 words.
Thought I'd try something different. You'll get more of a back story when you continue reading. Let me know what you think.
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You saved me from myself • Kairi Cosentino(Complete)
FanfictionYour parents have recently died and you're traumatised. You're 16 and you live by yourself in the house your parents owned. You live alone. But what happens when a certain boy moves in next door? Started: 14/06/2020 Finished: 28/07/2020