Irhaboggle Pride (2020) Quarantine Edition

Bi Buddies

"I thought you were gay!" Box50 typed, sending a few scream emojis after the sentence.

"Well, I admit that I'm one of the bis who uses "gay" instead of "bi" because it's funnier and meme-ier," Iris typed back. "And when I say "gay" I don't mean "homosexual" I mean "not straight", though I know that can be a bit confusing."

"Nah, bro, label how you wanna label!" six66 typed back. "If anyone else tries to tell you how to identify, screw them! And not in the good way!"

"LOL, I mean, of course, it's ultimately up to me," Iris agreed. "But at the same time, I do feel bad for misleading people."

"Well, it's not necessarily misleading," Dragonhero argued. "You do prefer women."

"But therein lies the double bind," Iris typed. "I feel like if I call myself gay and then wind up crushing on a guy, I will be called a liar. But since I do swing so much more towards women, would it be easier and simpler to just call myself gay anyway?"

For the past hour, Iris' internet friends had been chatting idly about gender and sexuality. Somewhere along the way, bisexuality came up as the topic of choice and, being bisexual, Iris had been quick to join in. At first, it was just trading memes and stories, but then it got into the slightly deeper stuff, which was where they all were now.

As Iris had said, she preferred women, but because she did still have some feelings for guys, she wanted to still identify as bisexual. But she did herself no favors by only ever talking about girls and by constantly calling herself gay. Was it any surprise Box50 had been so genuinely surprised to hear that Iris was bi rather than lesbian?

At the same time, though, bisexuality was complex. It was not a split 50/50. And no bi person ever owed an explanation to anyone else anyway. Even if Iris was infinitely more into girls, if that small attraction to guys made her feel compelled to identify as bi, then that was her choice. She didn't have to fit someone else's mental image of bisexuality to be valid. Bisexuality was too complicated for such simplicity anyway.

"I guess, too, I would just feel bad copping out and calling myself gay because bisexuality is a bit... iffy anyway," Iris admitted. She was, of course, referring to the array of biphobic remarks that the world could come up with. Whether it was as hostile as someone calling bisexuality a lie, or equating it with sexual promiscuity, or if it was as subtle and "harmless" as someone just wondering why a bisexual couldn't just pick a side, it was always there in some capacity and it really did get under one's skin after long enough.

"Ah, you wanna be a Bi Buddy and help represent the community, eh?!" FireSpirit sounded pleased.

"Of course," Iris replied. "I'd feel almost... biphobic, crazy as that sounds, if I were to try to deny it and choose an 'easier' term. Like, I know I am indeed more into girls, but bisexuality isn't a 50/50, so I'd feel bad just copping out and not calling myself bi. We're misunderstood enough already without me jumping ship to the more 'acceptable' label.

"Also, it would feel kinda rude to completely homosexual people if I were to call myself gay and then wind up with a man. If that makes sense," Iris continued, and the others were fast to agree.

Perhaps to some, her worries were trivial and overblown, but most of her closer internet friends understood her plight. Yes, labels could be a hassle, and incessant worry over them was harmful. At the same time, though, labels helped people find one another and find the language to describe themselves. That's what made them important and that was why Iris was so concerned about finding a label that fit her.

She knew she was already valid even if she didn't have a label, but she found labels to be simple and useful, hence why she wanted to find the one that really fit her perfectly. And all of her concerns, although a bit overanalytical, were still valid. How best to describe her sexuality? Should all possibilities be taken into account? Or just the realistic ones? Was it misleading to talk about women so much? Should she talk about guys instead in order to balance things out? Or would that seem like a cheap shot at trying to justify and prove her bisexuality? Would it be faster and easier to just call herself gay? Or would that be considered unfair to the bi community who was, as she had accurately said, already fairly misunderstood (both by straight and gay people alike)?

"Here's an idea," JaxlynKnight joined the chat. "We all somehow find a way to make it painfully clear that we're bi and proud and we will legit call our mini group the Bi Buddies."

"Oh heck yeah," Dragonhero and six66 all began to spam the chat with hearts in the color of the bi flag.

"Well I already know I'm calling myself Bi-ris," Iris joked, changing her user at that very moment. "It's fitting, too, my signature color is purple and the purple stripe in the bi flag is supposed to represent the fact that I like both guys and gals!"

"A match made in Heaven," the newly-named Dragon-queer-o sent some laughing emojis.

"Made even better by the fact that Iris is the Greek goddess of the rainbow," Bi-x50 pointed out.

"And that's double gay because man were the Greeks gay AF!" Jaxlyn the Bi-ght laughed.

"Bis represent!" Bi-reSpirit spammed the chat with bi flags. "No matter who we love, or what the exact percent is, or what we prefer, we ALL VALID OUT HERE IN THIS PRIDE MONTH!"

"And every other Pride month after that!" Jaxlyn agreed.

"Y'all, I made a group chat!" six66 (now renamed ByeBiBi) quickly added the others into the chat. Just as promised, it was titled "Bi Buddies" with a bi flag as the cover photo. Without even meaning to, Iris began to grin like an idiot. Although she'd always been confident in her bisexuality when she was alone, to receive such support from fellow bis meant the world to her. They didn't mind that she swung mostly towards girls. They still accepted her, and didn't mind her identifying as bisexual. Maybe it was trivial to the others, but it meant a lot to Iris, and she was more than happy to take her place amongst her fellow Bi Buddies.

AN: Not directly based on true events, but definitely based on thoughts and convos I've had in the past. All my bis, y'all valid no matter who you wind up with! Also, sorry for failing to keep my updates daily. It's been a busy couple of days. But I'm fine, so no worries. Happy Pride y'all! Stay happy, healthy, safe and sexy!