If You Run (An All Time Low Fan Fiction)

Chapter Twenty-Two

For a good few hours I sat in the same grotty waiting chair in silence. Hoping that someone would be kind enough to let me know what was happening with my best friend, but they never did.

I watched the people around me going about their business: important looking doctors rushing around with clipboards. nurses tapping away at their keyboards without a break, the flow of people coming in and out of the accident & emergency ward door and the others who had been also left in the dark about their loved one's health. 

My phone buzzed in my pocket. I glanced at the screen and ended the call before returning my gaze to the same spot on the floor I'd been staring at previously. Nothing else mattered to me in that moment other that making sure Cris was okay.

Jack's POV

I sat down on the couch in the back lounge of the tour bus as it started to pull away from where it was parked. It was just past one o'clock in the morning and we were all packed up and ready to move on to the next city.

I pulled my phone away from my ear and stared at it in confusion

"What's wrong with you? You look like you've been trying to think again" Rian laughed at me from the opposite side of the small room
"She hung up..." I told him trying to figure out why. She always answered.
"Maybe she just missed it" He said with a shrug
"No, it rang twice then went to her answer phone" I said
"Oh...she's probably busy" he said going back to his skype call with Cassadee
"Yeah" I said getting up and walking to my bunk

"You not having a drink, Jack?" Vinny shouted from the main kitchen/living area of the bus when he saw me 
"Not tonight thanks. Just going to go to sleep" I called back as I climbed into the box-like space and pulled the curtain closed.

'She probably was just busy' I tried to convince myself but anytime I'd called her before when she was busy she'd always answered and said she'd call back, what had changed? Had I done something? Why was I getting so hung up on this? I thought. It was probably her way of trying to get it through to me that I was annoying her. To her I was probably just some guy she met on holiday, she probably had no intention of keeping in contact with me when she got back to England but she was just being nice tolerating my phone calls and messages. She's probably met someone else by now, I thought. I mean, a girl like her probably has about ten guys after her all the time, why would she waste her time on me?

Cristina's POV

I remember hearing Tay playing her dad's song on the piano and dragging myself out of bed so that I could listen properly. We spoke for a brief moment then everything went black. When I woke up I was in a different room.

There were people shouting orders that I couldn't quite make out, my head throbbed and my body ached. I realised where I was, back in hospital. Suddenly, there was a head towering over me talking
"Cristina. Can you hear me?" the voice asked. I just nodded "Listen, love. You're in hospital, you collapsed. We're going to look after you now, don't worry. Just try to stay awake, can you do that for me?" I nodded again. 

I felt the prick of a needle plunge into my forearm.

All of my senses were telling me I needed to sleep, just close my eyes for a few minutes. I was exhausted.

I felt the contents of my stomach come rushing up my throat. I had just enough time to turn on my side and aim to the floor. I rolled onto my back again and closed my eyes
"Stay awake" the voice called again and I forced my eyes open. My body started to shake violently, I tried to stop but nothing worked
"She's having a seizure" an authoritative voice called but I couldn't feel what was happening anymore. Everything was numb. I could hear everything perfectly clear but that was it. I couldn't see or feel anything.

I listened to the voices rushing around me. After an hour or so the voices were calm and quiet again.

I could hear wheels turning and doors opening, I suspected I was being moved to somewhere else in the hospital. 

"She's stable now Dr. Should I bring in the friend and tell her what's happened?" a woman asked
"I'll see to that. Thank you and well done, your decisions kept this girl alive, just about" What does just about mean? I thought. I recognised the male voice as my doctor from last time I was here. Everything was silent for a while then I heard two sets of foot steps inside the room.

"Cris?" It was Tay "Is she asleep?" she asked the doctor
"She slipped into a coma. In a way it's good that she did, it meant we were able to steady her heart beat and breathing" he explained. I heard Tay breath in sharply
"How long will it last?" She asked quietly
"We don't know. Because it wasn't clinically induced we cannot say when she will wake up, I'm sorry" 
"She will wake up won't she?" she asked in alarm. He didn't answer.

The voice in my head was screaming but no noise came out. I was awake, I could think, hear but my body was dormant. 

"Can she hear me?" Tay asked
"Some say that a coma is just of the body and the person's mind is completely awake. That the subject can hear everything and answer in their head but nothing with come out of their mouth. There is a very good chance she's listening to our conversation as we speak" He said. I pictured Tay nodding and thinking, trying to take it all in. I urged myself to open my eyes or to make a sound or to move a limb, to let them know he was right, but nothing happened.
"In cases like this we allow family to stay at all hours. I know you're not technically 'family' but from what Cris told me last time you were here you may as well be. The hospital will let the rest of the Youngs know about the situation in the morning. Until then, a nurse will be round to check on and monitor Cris regularly. In case of emergency, press the red button there. There are drink machines just down the hall next to the nurse's desk where you can go for any other queries" I pictured him pointing to all the things he listed as he spoke "Tay... try not to worry too much. We're going to to everything we can for Cris" he said reassuringly.
"I know. Thank you Doctor" she replied
"Please, call me Liam" he said. Then I heard the door shut.

"Hi, Cris" Tay said quietly "Sooo, I even know if you can hear me so I might just be talking to an empty room" she laughed awkwardly "I don't even know what to say. I suppose there's a book on this somewhere that says people should make normal conversation, interact with whoever it is in the coma and all that but I guess I missed that one when I was at the library so I'm just going to talk at you instead" Yeah right, as if  you go to the library, I thought "I don't know how to deal with this. You're the strong one. You're the one with all the answers and now you're the one in the coma. I'm scared, Cris. I'm really scared. I need you to wake up for me, please, as soon as you can because if I loose you I'm scared of what I'll do," her voice started to crack and she took a second to take a breath and stop the tears from falling "It should be me there, not you. For the first time in my life, things were finally starting to get better but then Harry showed up again and now this. It's like someone, somewhere really has it in for me" Then there was silence.

After a while she spoke again, this time about different things: funny stories from school, about Charlie and how the three of us grew up together, about holidays and finally about our recent trip America. 

"I don't know what I was thinking, dragging Jack into my life. Nothing I do is simple, I'm going nowhere and he's got so much ahead of him" she said more to herself than me "You know I ignored his call before. I couldn't bare the thought of dumping even more of my problems on him so I just didn't talk to him at all and now he probably thinks I'm annoyed with him. Maybe this is the best way. In a few weeks he'll forget all about me, he'll find someone else when he's on tour and they'll be happy together. A few years down the line, the name 'Tay' will mean nothing to him and I'll smile politely whenever someone mentions him or his band even though it will be killing me inside because I know that this best for the both of us" she said, as if trying to convince herself she was right.

That was when I wanted to reply the most. I needed to tell her about the things she failed to see that everyone else did when we were all together. The way he looked at her when she spoke, the way he found a way to bring the conversation back to her when she wasn't around, the way he smiled when he saw her, the way she smiled back. Those three weeks were the happiest I'd ever seen Tay and it was because of Jack.

I needed to tell her she was making a huge mistake and that he was coming to see her in a week but I couldn't. All I could do was lie helplessly and listen to her throw away her path to happiness.