Just Too Sick To Function

10

Emma's POV

It's monday and I actually don't know what to do

Nandito ako sa room ko, sinusuot ko yung favorite sweater ko, lavender yung kulay at nag short ako na maong

I looked so thin wearing these babies, I swear, the diets did it.

Should I be thankful or what? I was so insecure kaya about myself

There's so many things that I don't like about myself

I don't have confidence, kahit gaano pa ako ka talktative towards sa mga tao

Mag ooverthink ako ng kung ano-ano

And it's not really easy, I've been trying to build my confidence up but I end up destroying it again

Anyways, my mom went to work and I am left here all alone, again.

Habang nagtatagal ako dito sa hospital, unti-unti ring nawawala yung feeling of loneliness pero minsan, may mga tao o pangyayari talaga na magpapa-alala sa'kin na...

Na ako lang to, ako lang ang nag fafight sa sakit na'to, ako lang naka feel ng ganito, ako lang ang naka feel sa pain.

Nanunuod nalng ako ng Kdrama

Natulog pa ata si Marcus, si Clent nasa school yun, kinakabahan ata yun dahil malalaman na yung mga results sa tests.

2 hours passed at nag eenjoy parin ako dito, hindi ko na pinansin ang pag enter ni Rosa sa room ko.

"It's not good for you to always be on the screen baby", she said

"Wala akong magawa Rosa, may suggestion ka ba? Huhu", I pouted

She looked at me with disbelief, the way I acted was new

I paused the video

"Mag drawing ka", she suggested,

"I tried pero walang pumapasok sa ulo ko, walang ideas"

"Read books?"

"Wala akong na gets sa binabasa ko, hindi ata gumagana utak ko ngayon"

"Mag write ka sa journal mo"

"Hindi ako interesado"

She sighed, "punta ka kay Marcus"

Marcus

"Alam mo ba kung ano ginagawa niya?", I asked

"No baby, I'm your nurse, how should I know?"

I laughed, "Well, hindi ba mag shashare kayo ng ano-ano with other nurses?"

She just laughed, "Well, yeah, pero not to the point na alam ko rin ang ginagawa sa pasyenteng hindi ko naman inaalagaan"

I smiled, "Oh well", I stand up, "what do you think of my fashion?"

She looked at my clothes

"Maypa fashion-fashion kapang nalalaman, hospital 'to baby", she commented

We laughed

" I might as well find myself a lover boy", I winked

"Landi nito", we both laughed again

Rosa doesn't fail to make me laugh, she never did and I doubt she will.

"Okay, punta muna ako kay Marcus", I said as I get ready

"Gusto mo ba si Marcus?", straight forward na tanong ni Rosa