Love Lessons | WinTeam [Complete]

Self-Blame

Team's POV

I slowly opened my eyes and could see an unfamiliar place with white walls and beeping machines. I looked around the room, my head still dizzy, and my vision blurry. I was laying in a white bed with an IV right next to me. I was in a room by myself, and the room was painstakingly bright. I looked down to where my wound was, and I saw that it was bandaged heavily. On the table beside my bed, there was a small machine with a button on it, and a note. The note read, "Push this button when you are awake." I pushed the button, and a doctor came in after about a minute. The first thing that came to my mind when he came inside was to ask where Win was.
"Where is Win? Is he okay? Is he hurt?" I asked.
"Calm down. Right now you need to focus on yourself," The doctor said.
"No, I need to know where he is. Is he okay?" I asked again, persistently.
"Alright, I will tell you. He is badly injured, but we believe that there is a high chance he will live," Said the doctor.
I sighed of relief, and I sat up in my bed. The doctor helped me sit up because I was still very weak.
"Do you think that you can walk?" He asked, worried.
"I think I can. The wound doesn't hurt that much, so I think I'll be okay," I replied.
"As a doctor, I do have to go with you to make sure that you don't fall," He said, helping me stand up.
"That's fine with me. As long as I get to see Win's face," I said.
He nodded. We walked out of my room, and he took me to Win's room. He opened the door as I held onto the rail next to the wall, and then walked me inside the room. I saw Win lying there, asleep. I sat down on the chair next to his bed and held his hand.
"What did he injure?" I asked the doctor.
"Are you sure you want to hear it?" He asked.
I nodded. I knew that it would probably hurt to hear how much he had been pained, but I wanted to know so that when he wakes up, I can take care of him.
"Alright then," The doctor said, then grabbing a small piece of paper which I assumed had the list of things he had injured on it, and read, "Win suffered from a minor concussion, cuts on his head, torso, and legs, a major cut on his right thigh from a rather large piece of glass from the front window of the car. Despite all these injuries, there was no damage done to his organs or brain, so the doctors believe that when he wakes up, he will make a full recovery."
I nodded, and I put my head on the bed and stroked Win's hand with my thumb.
"Would you like me to tell you what your injuries are? I didn't get the chance to, since we left the room so quickly." The doctor asked.
"Sure, go ahead," I said.
"You suffered from a major cut in the torso from glass, also likely from the front window of the car. You also suffered from a minor cut on the head. Your injuries should heal quickly, as they were not as serious as they could have been from that severe of a car crash."
I was only partly listening to him because I was too busy worrying about Win. I hope he wakes up soon so I can tell him how much I love him. This just makes me want to appreciate the time that we have more. When things like this happen, you realize how short life can be.
"Do I have to go back to my room, or is it okay if I stay here with him?" I asked the doctor.
"I think you can stay here for the rest of today, but you will have to go back tomorrow for a check-up on your wounds," He replied.
I nodded.
"I'll let the front desk know that you are here, and to tell any visitors to go here," He said.
"Thank you," I said.
He then left the room, leaving me there with Win. I looked at his face. There were cuts all over him. I started to tear up because I knew that I had caused him to be in that terrible car crash. It is because I told him to take the other route. It's my fault. I laid my head on the bed again, and before I knew it, I fell asleep.
All of a sudden, we were in the car again, and the crash happened again. The car spun and spun. I looked at Win to see his panicked face, trying so desperately to make sure that we would get out alright.
Team... Team. Team!
I woke up abruptly and looked around the room to see who was screaming my name. I looked to my side to see Pharm, Dean, and Manaow.
"Are you okay?" Manaow asked.
"Y-yeah, just a nightmare," I replied.
"We heard that you got into a bad car accident and that you were in the hospital, so we came to see if you were alright," Pharm said.
"My injuries are pretty minor compared to Win's, so I will be alright," I said.
I held onto Win's hand tighter than anything. My eyes started to tear up again, and they fell onto my lap. I tried so hard not to sob, but I failed. I dropped my head on the bed and started to cry out.
"It's my fault. It's my fault he got hurt! I told him to take the other route to school, and now he's like this!" I cried.
I could feel someone's hand stroke my back. It was Pharm.
"You can feel worried for him, but you can't blame yourself. It was whoever was in that other car's fault. Not yours," He told me.
I cried my heart out. I cried until I had no tears left to cry. I was like a desert. My tears had dried up. I still clung to Win's hand, still feeling like everything was my fault. I begged him in my head to wake up, and just be okay. Manaow, Pharm, and Dean sat down on the couch next to the door, and I stayed right next to Win.

Pharm's POV

I could see that Team was incredibly heartbroken over what had happened. He blamed himself for everything, even though it wasn't his fault.
Manaow looked puzzled, and I asked her what she was curious about quietly, as to not bother Team.
"Are they together? I know this isn't really a good question to be asking right now, but I am just a little confused," She asked.
"They are together. I think that is why Team is taking so much responsibility for what happened," I replied.
Manaow nodded, and covered her mouth, trying not to squeal. I smiled and looked at Team. His eyes looked worn out and tired. He looked so depressed and upset. I wanted to help him, but I didn't know how. I knew that I would probably have to leave it alone until he could figure out what he needed to make sure that he felt like it wasn't his fault anymore. Dean, who was sitting next to me, was obviously distressed. Win is his best friend and has been his best friend since their first year of high school. I put my hand on top of his and smiled. He interlocked our fingers and put his other hand on top of our tightly linked hands. With each beep of the HIV, we felt anxiety that it would all of a sudden just stop beating. Although the doctors said there were very high chances of him living, you can't help but be afraid. I leaned my head on Dean's shoulder, trying to calm my thoughts. I fell asleep on his shoulder.

Team's POV

I could see the concerned faces of my friends as they watched me stare sadly at Win. I wanted him to wake up. Why can't he just wake up? I love him, and I can't stand to see him like this. I wanted him to be okay. I put my head on the bed once again and closed my eyes. I held his hand tighter and felt a small movement. My eyes shot open, and I looked up to see Win's eyes open. They looked at me, and I started to cry. His hand lifted up and cupped my face. I put my hand over his weak one, staring at his tired face. The relief that flowed through my brain was overwhelming. He was finally awake.