Love Lessons | WinTeam [Complete]

"What were you thinking?!"

Pharm's POV

I watched the scene in front of me. There was a loud noise right before an embrace of one scared person, and another calm. It reminded me of Dean and me a long time ago, before our relationship started. Although I was worried about Team, I couldn't help but smile while thinking about the old times. 

"Are you okay?"

I asked Team.

He wasn't able to respond.

"He just needs some time to calm down. You know how it feels, don't you Pharm?" 

I smiled, eyebrows concerned, and nodded.

I knew exactly how it felt.

Team's POV

One of my panic attacks happened because of a single loud noise. I knew it was going to be hard, but I didn't expect it to be triggered because of this...

"I'm okay.. I just got a little scared."

I held my hand tightly in Win's hand. I wasn't going to let go even if someone forced us apart.

--

Lunchtime. Time was flying by pretty fast. Only a couple things got me scared along the day, but not as bad as it was in the morning. Little jumps, or yelps. Not much.

"What do you want for lunch?"

Win asked me.

"Well, I'm kind of craving a good ham and cheese sandwich right now."

I rubbed my stomach and pouted.

I noticed that Win had looked away. His hand was over his mouth, and his eyes were tightly shut. I could see the edge of his smile peeking out from under his hand as he tried so desperately to stay quiet. It was cute.

-

I waited at the table on my phone. I thought about how my father would probably already be in the U.S. by now. I didn't want to call him, but I picked up my phone anyway. My finger lingered above the button under his contact reading, "Call."

After a couple minutes of my finger sitting there, it started to shake. I forced it to press the button, and the phone started to ring. I slowly brought the phone up to my ear, not ready to hear his voice, but doing it anyway. I knew what excuse I was going to make if he picked up. It was sad that I had to lie to him. 

-Beep-

"Hello?"

I gulped. His voice sounded so empty.

"H-hi dad..."

"How are you?"

The fakeness in the question was more obvious than I ever was..

"I'm okay.."

"Oh. That's nice."

I wanted to hang up. I was so close to doing it.

"How are you?"

I asked him.

...

...

Silence.

My hand started to move my phone away from my ear, but I used my other hand to put it back. I wasn't going to let him off.

"If you're worried about when I cut you off in that call, I was in shock. I was going to call you back, but my phone died. I couldn't find my charger no matter how hard I tried, so I had to order a new one. I'm sorry I couldn't see you off. I couldn't ask you where you were."

I waited for an answer, but I didn't get one. All I got was the sound of the call ending.

I put the phone on the table, tears building up in my eyes. I wanted so badly just to call him back and tell him I love him, and that he's the best father in the world. But... I just couldn't.

-

I walked away from the table, and went to the swimming pool. I changed into my swimming shorts, and walked out to the pool. I stood by the edge, and after a long while of waiting, jumped in. I let my body flow along with the deep end, slowly falling deeper and deeper. I opened my eyes, and saw the clear water around me. My breath was running low, lungs starting to sting.

Ah... This was the calming feeling that I missed.

I closed my eyes again, letting the water take over me. 

It wasn't scary at all to me. I had felt like this before, but it was more desperate. Now that it's just a calm feeling, I think I can die with no doubt. It hurts to be alive. It's nice to be dead.

Minutes of staying in the water passed by. My breath was fully out, and I could feel my lungs filling with water. I was so close to being gone. It felt so amazing. It felt like I could finally be at peace. I was going to go in the best way. Calmly. The corners of my lips turned into a smile.

Suddenly, I could feel my body being lifted out of the water. My smile disappeared as I tried to shake off the person who was lifting me up. They grabbed me harder, and pulled me out of the water. I opened my sore eyes, and saw who lifted me out. Of course.

It was Win.

"What were you thinking?!"

I stayed quiet, wanting to go back underwater.

"You would've died! This isn't making progress at all!"

I stared at him, my expression showing slight anger.

"Isn't that what you want?"

He asked, quieter.

"The truth is..."