When Darkness Falls

Morning After

Once I come to, I immediately squint my eyes to try and get a clear image of everything. Fortunately, I don't have to work too hard, because the first thing I see is plenty enough for me. Phil. He's just so cute when he's sleeping.

We are facing eachother with our chests pressed together and I can clearly see the way his morning hair spreads across his face at awkward angles. Those blue eyes of his are nowhere to be seen, but that's okay for now. I'm just enjoying being able to see him in his natural state. The state where he can just relax all of his features without pretending to be happy or mad.

But my staring scession is quickly cut short when Phil's eyes start to flutter open. I can't help but smile at the series grunts and sighs he lets out as he tries to wake himself up.

The second his eyes meet with mine, they grow soft, causing a grin to form across my lips. But that softness in his eyes is soon replaced by confusion and he looks absolutely terrified. "What the hell?" He mumbles to himself.

I give him a confused stare as he slowly sits up and runs a hand through his hair. "I forgot you were here."

That shouldn't make me feel bad. Should it? I mean I definitely rememebred everything about last night. How could I forget? It was the first time in forever that I felt remotely happy. "Uh, I'm sorry?" I furrow my eyebrows at him while also trying desperately to not sound as offended as I feel.

"No, no I didn't mean it in a mean way. I just thought-" He purses his lips together and looks down. Thought what? "I thought it was a dream." His voice sounds really quiet as he speaks.

I'm still not sure how to feel about this. I haven't let anybody remotely close to me in forever. So, I don't know how people are supposed to act around people they care about. Nobody has shown any sort of caring emotion towards me in over eighty years. Well, except Anthony, but I'm pretty sure its just because he's lonely.

I look down at the mattress awkwardly and try to distract myself by picking at the loose strands of the fabric with my dulled finger nails. Phil is just sitting there staring at me while I do it with a confused and sad look on his face that he doesn't think I can see.

After a few minutes of sitting there with me not responding to what he'd said, he reaches up like he's about to stroke my cheek, but to my dismay, he stops his hand half way to me and lets it just sit there. Its like he doesn't know if its a good thing to do, to touch me. God, I want him to touch me. No, I don't want him to touch me. I need him to touch me.

I reach my hand out to his and grab it tightly. His eyes only grow wider when I pull his hand to my face and place it on my cheek and then let my eyes drift closed as his skin embraces my clammy skin. He's so warm. If only we could stay like this forever. I wish he would let me be with him so that I can protect him forever. He may not think he needs protection, but he does. He needs me almost as much as I feel like I need him.

After a few moments, I let my eyes flutter open and are immediately met with those bright topaz ones. They're filled with curiosity and softness. "Dan?" He shakes his head and looks like he's about to talk but I raise my finger and tell him to be quiet.

He doesn't know how much I need him. Him and his blood. God, I just need every aspect of this guy, but I can't have him like that and just knowing that and not being able to tell him why is tearing me apart. "Phil.." My voice is filled with such longing. I immediately curse mentally to myself. But I can't help the pulling feeling in my stomach, pulling me to him. Why does he make me so weak? He's just so ethereal to me.

Phil's face turns to a frown and he immediately breaks eye contact with me so that he can look down, but I just reach my hand out and grab his face. "Please don't look away."

His breath hitches in his throat as he looks back up at me with wide eyes.

Before I can try to talk myself out of it, I slowly use the hand of his that I had held in mine and pull him closer until our chests are pressed up against each other. Until I can feel his heart beating erratically against my chest. "Dan.. What're you doing?"

That's a good question. What am I doing? I shouldn't be trying to do this with him. I know how things like this always end for creatures like me. Up until now I've never wanted to be normal or human again, but if I could be with Phil then I would take it immediately. I wish he could understand that. "Phil, please." My eyes and my voice are practically begging, pleading for him to understand my pain without me having to tell him. "I need you." It barely comes out as a whisper, and for a second I didn't think he'd heard me.

But then he's putting his free hand on my cheek and looking into my eyes. "I won't leave you, okay? You're the best friend I've ever had, Dan."

Pain shoots through me at those words. His friend? Is that really all he see's me as? I'm just his friend? Then there was anger and irritation. "Your friend?"

He just gives me a sad look. "Dan.. I can't do this. I can't get attached to you. I just can't." He's just shaking his head now.

But I can't help the irritation and hurt in me. I'd come this long without feeling, and then I tell him that I need him and he's saying he doesn't want to get attached to me. This is what I get for letting someone in again. I should have known better.

And in one swift movement, I'm off of the bed and heading towards the door.

Phil's voice cuts off my walking. "Where are you going?" His voice sounds so confused. Why's he confused? He just broke the heart that I didn't think could be broken again. "Dan, you should know I can't do that. Not after my mom. Not after everyone else has left. I can't go through that again."

I just look back at him with a mixture of pure rage and horrible, crippling sadness. This is what I get for getting attached to him. "Me either."

Those two words looked like they completely broke him. Good. Now he knows exactly how those words feel to me.

And with that I push back tears and leave him sitting there on the bed by himself.

A/N OKAY I'M REALLY SORRY ITS SO SHORT
This chapter and the one before it were supposed to be one but i decided to make it two. I'm intentionally drawing it out, guys. Don't you hate me ugh.
ANYWAYS I'll see you guys next update!!!

BTW OMFG I GOT 1K READS I AM LITERALLY CRYING THANK YOU. ILYSM