Guarded Heart (The GH Series)

Chapter Twelve

We hooked up quite a few times since that day at the beach.  Every time we hooked up; I knew I was slowly letting my guard down.  We were lying in bed cuddled up one morning.
“Callie?”

“Yeah?”

“I know you don’t want me to reciprocate yet, but can I ask you something?”

“Sure, ask away.”  Now I know that I am changing.  I would never let anyone question me.

“Do you always come when we are having sex?”  I propped myself up and looked at her.  I do have to answer this question.

“Ashley, I do.  You just don’t see it.”

“Well, you disguise it well.  Well apart from when I feel you dripping on my ass.”  I knew I had to reassure her.  I owed her that much.

“Well, I do not mean to disguise it, honestly.”

“Okay.”  Her tone made me realise that this was getting harder for her not being able to have sex with me.

“Ash…you know…”  I looked at her.  “We came to a mutual agreement about what we are to one another…”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Come here…”  I took her in my arms and kissed her softly and spoke against her lips.  “Just a little more time is all I am asking for…”

“What do you mean?”

I looked at her and smiled softly.  “It means I have allowed you to touch me in places that I have not let anyone else do.  Whether is you digging your nails into my ass or touching my chest.  I sleep naked next to you.  I am working on me to allow you to go that little bit further.  So, will you…just give me a little more time, please?”

“I know.  I am sorry for being impatient.”

“It is okay. I completely understand.”  I had to get out of this bed.  I knew what was brewing and I was desperate to avoid it.

“Where are you going?”

“Bathroom.”  Ashley nodded and truth be told, I knew I was in the shit.  I have eyes, I can see, and I know that Ashley is falling for me.

Now before anyone else jumps to conclusions, I do have feelings for Ashley, genuine feelings. I just have this wall that I need to get over and then I can be hers, hook, line and sinker.

“So, I have some PT sessions today, so I am going to be working late.” I said to Ashley on return to the bedroom.

“Are you going to swing by after?”

“I am just going to head home babe.  It is a late finish.” 

Now, I did not lie to her.  The gym shuts at ten o’clock.  I just need to distance myself a bit to work out what the hell is going on in my head and in my heart.

***

Apart from texting, I have not seen Ashley.  I needed to detox from the drug she had become for me.   That was about to change for me when she walked into the gym and made me lose my concentration with the guy, I was doing a sessions with as she was fixing her shirt and it made my eyes wander.