Guarded Heart (The GH Series)

Chapter Twenty

We sat down in the living room and I looked around the familiar setting.  “Thanks again for putting up with me Sarah.”

“You are my best friend, if the roles were reversed you would do the same for me.”

I nodded my head in agreeance.  “In a heartbeat.”

That look came across Sarah’s face and I knew she was going to ask, so I was bracing myself for an onslaught of questions.
“So, are you going to tell me what went down?”

I sighed.  “I let my guard down.”

“What? Completely?”  Sarah was obviously astonished that I finally had let someone get that close to me.

“Yes.”  I took a drink of my tea and I could feel the ground swallow me whole.

“Bloody hell.  That’s massive.  But since you are here, I have to ask.  How quickly did it change?” 

Sarah had reached out and placed her hand on my hand and gave it a squeeze.  Sarah’s always managed to get information out of me.  I trust Sarah with my life and that is few and far between these days.

“Literally within a few days.”

That squeeze of reassurance from Sarah settled me slightly.  “That’s not good sweetie.”

“Sad thing is Sarah; it might have been end game for me.  The way we connected on all levels, I felt that she…well that bit doesn’t matter anymore.  Walking into that bar and overhearing her conversation with snotrag has killed what I thought we had.”

Sarah snorted and looked at me.  “Snotrag?”

“Aye, her best mate.  She has this mental green head of hair going on and she pissed me off, so she got that nickname.  Anyway, Ashley is oblivious that her best mate is in love with her.”

I had to then launch into what was said at the bar and then my phone call with Ashley last night in the hotel.

“So, she has basically let you both fall for each other knowing it originally started off as a thesis?”

I looked at Sarah.  My heart was breaking all over again and all I wanted to do was go running back to Ashley and straight into her arms.

“Yeah.  I laugh in my head now as her words ring in my head.  She said we had to start our journey off by being open and honest with one another.  What a crock of shit.”

“Callie…for what it is worth, I feel that although she has messed up, she genuinely likes you or why else would she have freaked out and tried to get a hold of you?”

I looked at Sarah and my head was beginning to thump hard with all the stress.  I just wanted to be with Ashley.  After everything I had been through, I thought Ashley was going to be my end game.  My partner.  But more fool me.

“I was open and honest from the get-go.  She wasn’t.  I do not think I can get over that.”

“You are hurting and processing right now Callie.  Give yourself time and space to figure things out.”

My turn to squeeze Sarah’s hand and I gave her a small smile that shows my thanks.  “I know.  Thanks again though babe. Once again, you are my saviour.”

Three weeks had passed, and it took all my resolve to continue to sever contact with Ashley.  Do not get me wrong, it was hard as hell and I had to take each day as it comes.

I do not take lies or heartache too well and with various things that went on in my past, let’s just say, I have become emotionless and detached from everything I had worked so hard on.