The Car Crash Club • Monsta X

xxiii.

Father drives them out to a forest preserve that's about an hour away from their house. He says the trees are beautiful here this time of year, and Hyungwon looks around and takes in all the colors – oranges and yellows and reds – and he thinks that it is beautiful too. He has a backpack on his shoulders full of extra clothes, snacks, and his game that he hid in the very bottom where Father won't find it. Father has a backpack too full of all their other stuff.

They hike for a long time – Hyungwon doesn't know how long, just knows that his feet started hurting a while ago but Father kept saying that they were almost there which was always a lie. Finally, they stop in a clearing that's bordered on trees by three sides. The fourth side is open and provides a view of the rest of the preserve.

"Listen up," Father says as he sets down his backpack. It must be heavy because it makes a loud sound as he drops it to the ground. "You can't go over there-" He points to the open side of the clearing. "Unless I'm with you because it's dangerous, okay? There's a very steep decline, and if you fall, you could get hurt badly. Okay, Hyungwon?"

Hyungwon nods to say that he understands, and he tugs off his backpack as well, flinging it onto the ground and bouncing on his feet a few times now that the weight is off his back.

Father sets up the tent, and when the stars begin to peek out from behind the curtain of darkening sky, Father takes Hyungwon over to the edge of the clearing. They sit down and look out over the preserve, the hills and valleys blurring into a vague expanse of shadow. Then they look to the sky. Father points out a constellation before setting his arm around Hyungwon's shoulder. Hyungwon scoots in a little, the chill of the forest setting into his bones, and he points to the sky and makes up a few constellations of his own. Father laughs, and despite the cold, Hyungwon feels warm.

Inside the tent, they get ready for bed, and Father helps him get undressed. Father tells Hyungwon that he is beautiful for the first time. Hyungwon tells Father that he is cold and wants to change into warm pajamas, but Father says that it's okay, he'll warm Hyungwon up. He rubs his hands up and down Hyungwon's arms, and the friction does indeed warm Hyungwon up. Father says they can sleep next to each other to stay warm, and so Hyungwon moves his pillow next to Father's. He closes his eyes but can't get comfortable. The ground is hard and he still feels cold even though he's next to Father. He turns over to make sure Father is sleeping before getting up and grabbing his game out of his backpack. He slips back next to Father, laying on his stomach, and turns the sound off on his game before he starts playing.

He doesn't know how much time passes, but then Father asks, "I thought I told you not to bring your game, Hyungwon."

"Sorry," Hyungwon says immediately, shutting the game before looking over at Father to see if he's disappointed in him, but Father just puts a hand on his back and rubs his palm in circles.

"I'm not mad at you," Father says, and Hyungwon exhales in relief, a small smile lighting up his face. "Now be a good boy and go to sleep," Father instructs, squeezing his shoulder once, and Hyungwon nods, shoving the game under his pillow because he doesn't want to get up and go to his backpack. He knows Father buys him gifts because he's a good boy, and he doesn't want Father to stop. He can be a good boy. Even if the game is poking against his head from under the pillow.

--updated 06/30/20, part 3/3--