The Four Seasons Of Gerard Way (A Gerard Way Crackfic)

Chapter 29: Bandit's Play

"Coffee coffee coffee coffee." Vamps said as he poured himself a cup of coffee. His mug said, "#coffeeorgetthef***out" 

"Will you be in my play?" Bandit asked Cherry and Snow. 

"A play?!" Snow said with excitement, picking her up, she smiled and nodded. "Yeah!" 

Cherry flipped his boa over his shoulder. "Will you please be in it Cherry?" She asked again. 

"Is my character fabulous?" 

"Yes." 

"Okay." 

Bandit cheered and ran over to Vamps and asked him to be in it as well. "Oh hell no." Vamps replied. 

"Awww." Bandit said, her lip began to wobble. Gerard glared at Vamps and Vamps glared back. 

"Oh come on, Vamps." Dan said. Vamps sighed and looked down at the little girl who was about to cry. 

"Fine." He heavily sighed. 

"Yay! Okay, so Cherry, you're the fabuwous princess. Snow, you get to be the prince!" 

"Yes!" Snow said. 

If Cherry had a drink, he would have totally spat it out. "Say what now?! Uh uh, honey, no." 

"Cherry pleaaaaeeeeesseeeee!!!!!" She started crying and everyone in the room folding their arms across their chests and looked at him,  judging-ly. "OMG whatever."  

They all cheered and Snow wrapped his arms around him. "Yay!" 

"Don't. Touch. Me. You little bitch." 

"Vamps, you're the dragon." 

"F**** yeah!"  

"What can I be?" Phil asked. 

"You can be the princess's pet lion." 

"Yes!" 

"Dan can be the princess's Danosaur." 

"Yay!"  

************ 

"Alright, so we have the costumes and the lines, so now let's rehearse." Bandit clapped her hands and giggled. Everyone was in their costumes, Dan was in his dinosaur one that he wore for Halloween, Phil got his lion one on, Vamps put a black cape on, Cherry had a red boa, and glittery clothing, and Snow had his Black Parade jacket on. Gerard was the co-director and Lindsey was the camera lady. 

Bandit sat in her chair and yelled through a cardboard tube that she was using as a megaphone. "So, Cherry, you walk in and be fabulous, Dan and Phil, be his lion and dinosaur, so sit there and stuff, Vamps, you come in when Cherry goes to take a nap, and Snow, after Vamps comes in and Cherry calls for help, you come in and save the princess!"  

"Action!" 

Cherry walked in and dramatically flipped his boa over his shoulder. "I need beauty sleep." He said, while Dan and Phil sat there, making various dinosaur and lion noises, and Phil was licking himself. 

Cherry laid down on the couch, and Dan tossed a blanket over him. He smiled as he tucked his hands under his head and pretended to be asleep. 

"And dragon!" 

Vamps came running in, growling and roaring. "RARRRRRRRR!!!!!!" 

Cherry screamed and shot up. "OMG! SOMEONE SAVE MEEEE!!!!!!" 

"I'll save you!" Snow heroically jumped into the room saying, he pulled out a foam sword. 

"RARRRR!!!" Vamps roared. "Die motherf****!!!" 

Snow and Vamps pretended to fight, while Dan and Phil cheered them on. Dan through some red ribbon around, it was supposed me blood. 

"Now the dragon hurts Snow." Bandit yelled through the 'megaphone'. Vamps slashed at him and Snow dramatically fell to the ground. 

"AH!" Snow yelled, holding his arm. 

"Snow, he hit you in the stomach." Bandit added. 

"Oh, right. AH!!" He held his stomach. He then reached up, and stabbed the dragon with his sword. 

"NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!" Vamps wailed, falling to the floor and pretending to die. 

Dan and Phil clapped, as did Cherry. "You saved me!" Cherry exclaimed. 

"It was nothing, your...... Princess..... Ness." Snow replied, bowing to Cherry.  

"Cherry, your line." Bandit reminded him. 

"Ugh, fine. You're my hero." He muttered. 

"Cut! Great, now part two! Places!" 

"What's part two about, B?" Gerard asked. 

"Well, it takes place after this. So the prince comes over for tea, and that's when the princess tells him that she's pregnant." 

"She's what now?" 

"Yup, she used to be married, but he was a meanie so she kicked him out." 

"Oh...... O.... Kay?" 

*After reading the script and stuff* 

"Ugh, do I have to so this?" Cherry whined. 

"Yes, places!" Bandit yelled, they all went to their places. "Pft, actors." She whispered to Gerard. 

"Tell me about it." 

"Action!" 

Snow walked into the room and sat with Cherry. "Thank you for inviting me over for tea, princess." 

"Uhhuh. Ugh, there's something I need to tell you." He muttered, being an irritated diva. 

"Hmm?" Snow took a sip of imaginary tea. 

"I'm pregnant." 

Snow spit the tea, that he never had, out. "What?! Why didn't you tell me!?" 

"I just did stupid." 

*Cough cough* "Hey," Dan said, "why doesn't the prince help you take care of it, because your husband was a dickhead?" 

"Yeah! That's a great idea, Danosaur." Phil added, they both nodded. 

"Yeah! I'll help you!" Snow cheered. 

"Oh God. Okay, yay!" 

"Cut! Great, mommy, did you get all of it?" 

"Yup."  

So, they hooked it up to the television, after they all had changed and cleaned up the set, and watched the play.

"You did a good job, Bandit." Gerard said. 

"Thank you." 

"Yeah." Phil added. "The effects were nice. 

*Face palm* 

O.O 

__________________________ 

So, this chapter was longer! Sorry if it wasn't as funny. 

Please be sure to vote and comment! 

Thanks for reading!