Dear James

Just a dream

Nylah

I haven't seen Avory since I told her about my little munchkin. I tried call but she always claims to be busy or whatnot but I know she's still mad at me. Although she's my sister she doesn't act like it when she's mad. Avory knows how to hold a grudge and she's been holding onto this one for almost two months.

All day while I was at work I contemplated on whether to tell Kim or not. Work was slow and long so I had plenty of time to think on it. When closing time approached I finally made up my mind. Tonight is the night I'm going to tell her. I got in my car to get ready to go home. I picked my phone and called Kim. She picked up on the third ring.

"Hey I was just about to call you."

"Oh , well okay you go first."

"Tylers taking me on a cruise for our anniversary. So I won't be home for a while." she said excitedly.

My eyes lowered and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't be happy for her. I don't know why but I couldn't stand Tyler.

"Thats great."

"So what were you going to tell me ?"

"Oh nothing" I trailed off.

"Okay well I'll call you tomorrow to check on you."

I hung up the phone and made my way home. It dawned on me that maybe this happened for a reason maybe it wasn't meant for me to tell her yet. Once I got home, as usual, I changed out of my work clothes and into something more comfortable. I laid in my way bed and scrolled down my Instagram news feed. Coincidentally babies were being born today, it made me think about mine and what it would look like. Nothing made it real for me yet. I understood that I'm ohaving a baby in five months but nothing has clicked yet. Soon enough I dozed off.

I snapped out of my deep sleep and shot out of my bed. Excruciating pain shit through my body. I yelled out for help. Something is wrong. I somehow managed to get to my car and drive to the hospital. I felt something ooze out of my body, blood.
I walked into the room in agonizing pain, my stomach was hurting. I could barely stand and I was depending on he wall to hold myself up. I screamed and someone helped me into a wheelchair and started rolling me down the hallway. I could feel blood oozing out of myself. The nurse looked at me and assured me that everything would be okay.

Again, a pain shot through my stomach and I screamed. I couldn't bare the pain. Its worse than anything I've ever encountered. I looked down to see my swollen belly move in weird ways then suddenly ,I saw a hand scrape across my skin.

"What was that ?" I asked in a panic.
She couldn't answer me. Finally she got me to a room. As the man transfered me to the bed I tried my hardest to not to curse anybody out. They were trying to help me but this pain was getting worse. Next thing I know I feel the baby detach from my body . I waited to hear my little one cry hut all I heard was the chaos of the nurses and doctor. A sudden feeling of emptiness crept inside of me.
I removed myself from that place and realized that it was just a dream.
Once I realized that it was just a dream I calmed down and took a few deep breaths. I wiped the light sweat from my head and neck. I checked the time on my clock it was only seven and still light out. Because of the sudden nightmare and my being home alone I decided to to go to Kaiden's house. I went to my closet and grabbed my uggs. I walked out of the door in a long sleeve shirt and Nike shorts, making sure to grab my daily dose of my mess. I went upstairs to Kaiden's. I knocked on the door and waited for him to answer.
Once he opened the door he leaned on it, almost like he was sleeping, just like I was.
"Since when do you knock? You forget your key?" he opened the door to let me in and I went for the kitchen quickly taking my pills, chasing them down with some water.
"I thought you were mad at me so I thought I would knock."

"I was never mad at you, why would you think that?"

"Only because you havent called or anything."

"Oh well sorry. Work has me going crazy. I barely even get to sleep."

As he talked I made my way over to the couch and sat down. Once I got in a comfortable position he rested his head on my lap and looked up at me. His hair was sightly matted so I ran my fingers through his hair.
"I guess so, you look like hell."
The entire time I was over we just chilled the entire time. He basically just fell asleep on me. While I watched him sleep I ran my fingers through his hair and across his face. It felt right for him to be here with me and I didn't want this to end. Maybe sometime soon I could tell him that I lied to him. I really hope he forgives me for lying.

The next day

I spent the night Kaiden's last night only because I didn't want to leave him. I woke up earlier than him to make breakfast. While I finished up in the kitchen I seen Kaiden come from his room. He came in the kitchen and wrapped his hands around my waist. I made his plate and handed it to him. He sat down at the table and began to devour his plate. While he was sleeping I ate way before he came out.

"Yo that was good, thank you." he said kissing me on the cheek after he out the plate in sink.

"Thanks, um Kaiden I have to tell you something. "

"Alright, Wassup? "

I bit down on my lip and lowered my head as he walked closer to me. I could feel the little one move inside of me, almost as if they knew what I was about to do.

"When I told Brandon about the baby he told me to take care of it. So I broke up with him... And I didn't take care of it... I'm still pregnant Kaiden."

"You really want to go through with this?" I nodded. "Then I'll be there for you. I'll be help you regardless. Look at me," he lifted my chin and I looked at him into his deep brown eyes. "Im always gonna be here Nylah, always. Okay?" Again I nodded before he kissed my forehead and brought me close to his chest.
I sighed in relief. He didn't get mad and he's still going to be here to help me, that's all I wanted. That's all I ever wanted from anybody. Seems like he's all I need right now.

Nylah and Kaiden back in high school in the M/M