Jacksepticeye Oneshots

I'll Be Good

ANGST/FLOOF

I thought I saw the devil

This morning

Looking in the mirror, drop of rum on my tongue

With the warning

To help me see myself clearer

I never meant to start a fire

I never meant to make you bleed

I'll be a better man today

Anti knew from the moment he was created that his intentions were evil. Every morning he woke up having to accept that he could one day become something he couldn't control, and that definitely put a strain on your relationship. Anti would drink on the nights he felt too swarmed with the rarity that was sorrow, and rum and vodka met his stomach to drown the guilt of shouting at you. Arguments on whether or not Anti was going to hurt you left him looking in the mirror, promising to treat you better than he did himself.

I'll be good, I'll be good

And I'll love the world, like I should

Yeah, I'll be good, I'll be good

For all of the times

That I never could

Both you and Anti reassured him that nothing bad would happen so long as he tried to be good. By promising this, Anti desperately tried to resist his violent urges. Instead of wielding his knife about, he wrapped his arms around you and waited for the murderous desires to pass. Out of all the evil deeds Anti had done, all the screaming and arguing with you, he was sure they outweighed the good and he was tired of that. Anti was desperate to keep you, and to do so he would have to change his ways and learn to be superior to the darkness.

My past has tasted bitter

For years now

So I wield an iron fist

Grace is just weakness

Or so I've been told

I've been cold, I've been merciless

But the blood on my hands scares me to death

Maybe I'm waking up today

Anti, of course, slipped on multiple occasions. He couldn't run from his past, and for years he held an iron fist and was ready to fight anyone who challenged his power. Peace was weak is what Anti grew up being told, and he used that advice to remain the cold and evil demonic entity he was. But, upon meeting and falling in love with you, a switch had been flipped and the blood on his hands became repulsive. Maybe - even after faltering - Anti could stop being terrified of change and wake up to the fact that you needed him to.

I'll be good, I'll be good

And I'll love the world, like I should

I'll be good, I'll be good

I'll be good, I'll be good

Like a mantra, Anti repeated to himself day and night that he needed to be good. You helped him by letting him punch the wall, and you allowed him to kick the furniture or rip apart a pillow. If taking out his anger on inanimate objects helped restrict Anti's urges, then you'd let him tear apart your entire home. All of your faith was in Anti and you wanted nothing more than for him to be able to withstand his own power.

For all of the light that I shut out

For all of the innocent things that I doubt

For all of the bruises I've caused and the tears

For all of the things that I've done all these years

And all

Yeah, for all of the sparks that I stomped out

For all of the perfect things that I doubt

Anti spent years shutting out the light and giving in to the temptation to kill. He didn't bother trying to see the innocence in anything, and he wouldn't hesitate to bruise his own knuckles when he was livid. But when he realized he had made you cry, Anti regretted every mistake he made over the years and promised to rekindle the flame that was your relationship. All of the times he doubted your sincerity and love for him, Anti would make up for somehow.

I'll be good, I'll be good

And I'll love the world, like I should

Yeah, I'll be good, I'll be good

For all of the times

I never could, oh, oh-oh

Oh, oh

Oh, oh-oh

For all of the times I never could

All of the times I never could

He wasn't perfect and you knew that, but that didn't stop either one of you from building him to be the better man. You encouraged him to try but not once did you demand him to. Anti was incapable of becoming something he wasn't, but attempting to be better for your sake let you know that he cherished your love. It would take years to make his habits disappear, but you were willing to stick by his side so long as Anti tried to be good.

Thanks for readin <3