Jacksepticeye Oneshots

It's Gonna Be Okay

ANGST/FLOOF

The car was closing in on you.

After driving from work (where you were fired), you began to question your own self worth and work ethic. There was no way what your boss said was true. Budget cuts, he said, and you were expendable being the newest employee. It wasn't fair—nothing was fair—and you cried the entire way home as your mind started cursing you for being so useless.

Your hands gripped the steering wheel after you parked in the parking lot of your flat. The moon was high in an inky black sky and the only source of light came from the pole standing beside your car. Artificial light poured in from the windshield, sending shadows dancing across your hands as you struggled to breathe. You're useless; a waste of space; good for nothing and there is no point to anything, you thought.

The car was closing in on you and there was no way you could move. Your legs were trapped and your hands wouldn't let go of the steering wheel. Lungs constricting, you did your damnedest to let go but your knuckles turned white the tighter you gripped the wheel. The weight of the world came crashing down and burned at your chest, leaving you gasping for air. It's all going to go away. Everything you've worked so hard to accomplish can be snatched away by being fired, giving up, or dying. You might as well curl into a ball and let nature run its course, sweeping you away like the useless pile of bones you are.

A knock at the window didn't gain your attention. You couldn't see past the veil of tears that clouded your eyes, and the panic attack that held you in place was relentless. Sweat beaded up on your brow and you wanted to wipe it away, but your breathing was frantic and there was no way in Hell you were able to move. Being immobile only worsened your panicking.

Anti appeared in the passenger seat and you could see his mouth moving, but no words registered. Ever so slowly he edged towards you, his hands reaching out to grip onto your wrists. Anti had seen a previous panic attack of yours and knew that most of the time you appreciated something to hold—something to ground you—and he held both your hands to do so. Anti was cold and his hands were rough, but you tightly held onto his fingers as if they were a lifeline. He was your lover, in a simple word, and he knew something was wrong. He sensed it, but didn't bother asking until you could speak.

Your gasps left you shaking, and strands of hair fell into your face and stuck to your parted lips. Anti brushed locks of hair behind your ears, inhaling sharply when you gripped his hand so tightly that he glitched. "Iţ'͢s ̧gonǹa̕ ̴be͏ ͡ok̵a̡y," Anti said. You could hear his voice and that alone was enough to make you want to calm down. The need to hear Anti grew, and his eyes found yours once you slowly turned your body to face him. "T̷h͞a͡t͝'s͜ ͝i͏t.͟ Com͞e ͟back͞ t͢ǫ ̧me," Anti whispered. "D̵e͟e͝p ̨b̶re͝a҉th̕s̢." His hands never let go, and your fingers were tightly locked between his as you took a breath, held it, and exhaled. Anti was here and he was violent and reckless and yours; he would protect you.

When your breathing started evening out, Anti gradually released your hands and breathed out a sigh of relief when you let him go. Once you reached a hand out, Anti pulled you onto his lap and leaned the passenger seat back so you were lying down against his chest. He ran a hand through your hair as you wiped tears away with the sleeve of your shirt. The car was cold and small, but being with Anti distracted you from the onslaught of negativity that had overwhelmed you moments ago.

"Dǫ ́y̡ou wąnt҉ ͏t̢o̧ ta̴l͟k ̸about ͞i̷t͘?" Anti's question broke the silence. You shook your head no, and Anti let his arms hold you closer. "O͟k͟a̶y͝," he whispered, "but̶ ͘j͠us̢t͏ ̨k̡n͘ow͘ ́i̵t'̀l̵l ͠al̡l b̴e a̛lrig͏ht͝. L̸ive ͟f̷or ̢t͘o̴d̷ay and ̶d̴o ̧t̢he̸ b҉ęs͜t͘ yoù ̴c̡an.̸ ̀Don't͡ ̀w̛or̕ry̸ ̨about͢ th̸e ͏fu͏tưre̴ bec͘a̴u҉se ̶t̡hęŕe͝'̴s ̨n͞o po͝i̕nt̸ spend҉ìnǵ t͢he͏ ̕p̛r͞ese̛nt͏ ͝g͏uessing̷ about̴ ͜a f̷utur̨e͟ ̨y̷ou'l͘l͜ ̧get t̵o ́e̶ve͠nt̡ua̸ll̴y͟" Anti's chest buzzed as his deep voice anchored you back to Earth. If he had a heartbeat you would be able to hear him, but the feeling of his words against your ear was enough. The moment with Anti was enough, and you would do your best to enjoy the peace.

Thanks for readin lads <33