courtney: so gwen, you wanted to apologize?
gwen: yeah
gwen: it was such a shitty thing for me to go behind your back and pursue duncan like that
courtney: oh definitely.
gwen: especially after becoming your bestfriend
courtney: right behind you on that one.
gwen: :/
gwen: i just wanted to say that what i did was horrible, and i am aware of that. i broke your heart and ruined our friendship. i shouldn't have let some stupid boy plauge my thoughts like that
courtney: it was horrible. you're absolutely right.
gwen: it was so selfish of me to take a boy over my bestfriend, especially considering that the boy i was interested in was my bestfriends boyfriend
courtney: yeah i thought that too.
gwen: can you please stop being so petty and actually talk? this is a conversation with a wall.
courtney: fine.
courtney: i dont accept your apology, but i acknowledge it. it tore my heart open to have my bestfriend and my boyfriend go behind my back. i thought i could trust you.
courtney: no amount of apologies could remove the grudge i feel against you and duncan.
gwen: i know and i understand
courtney: why? why did you do it?
gwen: it's a long story
courtney: i have time
gwen: alright
gwen: so during action, i was very happy with how my life was and very happy at trents side. he treated great and was a wonderful boyfriend, until we got split up.
gwen: he became more and more obsessive and it started creeping me out, and duncan recognized that, so he stood up for me and talked with me and allowed me to vent to him
gwen: he made me feel heard and made my emotions and opinions feel validated
gwen: so we became friends, and i began to develop a small crush
courtney: and that's where it all went downhill
gwen: yeah.
gwen: i kept telling myself and telling myself that it should be repressed, because you guys were into eachother/dating at the time
gwen: but the feeling grew stronger and stronger the more time i spent with him, and by the things he did i could tell it was reciprocated
gwen: so i did a horrible and selfish thing. i let him kiss me. i let him flirt with me. i broke your trust and went with my feelings over everyone elses.
gwen: he made me feel heard and appreciated. he made me feel like i wasnt some loser, so i clung onto that feeling because it made me feel good. i never once thought about how you would react, and in retrospect i should have
gwen: im so sorry for what ive done, and it took a lot of time to realize that, but i know now
courtney: i think i understand your side a bit clearer now
courtney: it pains me to say this, but i know that i am not completely right either
courtney: i was very controlling over duncan and wanted to mold him into an ideal boyfriend. instead of loving him for the person he was, i tried changing him, and i understand why he flocked to you afterwards
courtney: and i know i broke your trust as well with that elimination list thing. sorry
gwen: you're forgiven. and hey, i would have done the same thing for a million
gwen: do you think theres a chance that we could become friends again? i really miss hanging out with you and laughing with you
gwen: i understand if you want to keep your distance
courtney: i dont know.
courtney: maybe. if i can get my trust back up in duncan, and you dont show your interest in him anymore, theres a chance. it will take a long time getting on my good side and i hope you understand.
courtney: and i miss you too. we had so much fun together and i was always so happy when i hung out with you. i just down know if im ready to actually befriend you again and open up
gwen: understandable. i would be wary too
gwen: just know that ill be supporting you
courtney: thank you. ill support you too
gwen: unless you do something shitty
courtney: oh yeah 100%
gwen: it was good finally getting everything out of my head. i feel lighter now
gwen: thank you for listening and talking with me
courtney: thank you for admitting your faults
gwen: back to the groupchat?
courtney: back to the groupchat :)
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this chapter is short oops
but we love character growth and development
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