MEN DO CRY
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I prepared Nshima with mince meat and impwa for Ba Jacob and his friend, when they came over he handed me an envelope.
"You can review these later and if you still want me to continue with the investigations then you let me know tomorrow"
I served them their food and anxiously waited for them to leave so I could see what was in the envelope.
After they left, I locked up the door switched off everything and went to my bedroom with my bottle of beer.
I sat on the bed and opened the envelope, what I saw made me freeze. When I suspected Chard had someone else not once did I think it would be the very person I considered my sister.
"Ahhhhhhhhhhh" I screamed out of anger, pain, betrayal, disappointment and hurt. Why would my best friend go behind my back and start up something with the man I loved.
I stood up and threw the bottle in my hands in frustration as I looked at the photos of Chard and Nicole kissing, they looked as if they were enjoying the kiss. They were so many photos of them talking, in another photo he carried her on his shoulder, while on the other one he was packed at her gate.
"Nicole why?" I asked as the beads of water fell down from my eyes one after another without stopping, I stood up and started throwing everything that was near me, I didn't imagine a day would come when Nicole would double cross me like this and to think I talked to her about it the last time.
That night I couldn't sleep, the pain I was feeling was unimaginable, I had already planned how I was going to eliminate Chard's new woman but now that I found out that his new woman was my best friend how could I even have her killed, after all we had shared, all the moments we had spent together.
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"Chard, that kiss meant nothing, I felt absolutely nothing it was a mistake that I will never want to repeat" Those words pierced my heart deeply, they hurt me in ways I could never have imagined, when I kissed Nicole, I felt something deep move within me, I had kissed several women but none made me feel like she felt and somehow I had hoped she felt what I felt so she could give us a chance but no she just had to tell me the kiss was bad.
When her lips touched mine, they were soft and warm, I couldn't stop thinking about her and her sweet lips, I wanted more of them but it hurt knowing I might never have another chance with her.
When I got home I started drinking, it was the only way I knew to erase the pain, I was so consumed with beer I didn't hear anyone enter the house.
"What is happening to you?" Maya asked
"Chard what is the meaning of this?" Mum asked as she grabbed the bottle of beer from me
"Give it back" I said with so much sorrow
"No"
"This whole place smells like a beer hall, when last did you clean up? This is not the Chard I know, what's happening to my son"
"Mum you wouldn't understand"
"Then make us understand" Maya said
"Come go and take a bath and let me clean up then we can talk later" Maya said as she helped me up
I went to my bathroom and took one long bath, I didn't know what I would tell my mum and sister, this was the first time they had ever seen me in such a mess, I had been taught to always handle my emotions well but this time around I couldn't take control of them.
When I walked out of my room, the house was spotless. Mum was watching TV as Maya prepared supper.
"You look better, come and sit here my baby" she said pointing to where she was sitting
"I went and sat next to mum, she patted my back as if assuring me everything would be fine.
"My baby, you can talk to me you know that right? You never drink this much and I also got a report you are slacking at your work, that's not my baby, what's happening?"
I narrated everything about Nicole to mum and Maya then Maya burst out laughing.
"What?" I asked confused
"Gosh Chard are you such an idiot to recognize this?"
"What?"
"You are in love" they both said clapping their hands
"Love?" I asked
"Yes"
"So this is love?"
"Who is this woman and why don't you get her?"
"She doesn't want me and she has someone in her life"
"This not reason enough to kill yourself with beer, just be consistent, if she is yours then she will come around"
I spent the evening with my family then later slept, I would not give up on Nicole but patiently wait for her.
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I got to the office early and surprisingly Chard was already there.
"Morning" I greeted when I entered his office
"Morning Nicole"
"Nicole?"
"Oh Nora, sorry how are you?"
"Well I am not fine, who would be fine being mistaken for someone else?"
"It was just a mistake"
"I see"
"How is my schedule for today?"
"No meetings, you just need to go through the things I emailed you the last time"
"Oh okay, let me get to work then"
"Chard"
"Yes Nora"
"Why Nicole?"
"What do you mean?"
"Why would you go after my best friend knowing very well how I feel about you? Is this to punish me?"
"Nora, this has nothing to do with you, I love your friend"
"Love you say?"
"Yes love"
"Chard, you change women almost every time, you can't stand here and talk about love besides, Nicole is not in your league you will just end up hurting her"
"That's not for you to decide"
"She is seeing someone and they will be getting married soon so stay away, find someone else but leave Nicole alone"
"Nora, let me get to work, don't get involved in this, this is between me and her"
"I don't care you just leave her alone"
"I know she feels the same way about me, so I won't leave her alone, I love her and I won't stop till she is mine"
"What happens to me and what we share?"
"The only thing we shared is sex and nothing else, I don't love you, what I feel for your friend is something I have never felt for anyone else"
"You can't do this to me Chard"
"I love her, just accept that and help me win her"
"Over my dead body" I said and walked out of the office.
How could he fall in love with my best friend of all people? If he thought I would watch by and let them date then he had another thing coming. I spent the day sulking and immediately it was 16:00 I packed my things and drove to Nicole's house.
As I drove all sorts of things ran through my mind, just how did she have to be in Chard's love equation and why?
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During my childhood I had no friends I could look up to, most of them were fake, they would smile in my face and gossip about me behind my back, being an only child the only friends I had were my parents and my cousins. After high school I left the Copperbelt in search for something new-friendship and love so when I met Nicole I was so happy but also scared about her betraying me. We were so different, she was more on the perfect side while I was the wild one but in due time she proved her loyalty to me.
6 months into University I got really depressed after my boyfriend Max dumped me, the depression did me bad I turned to drugs and it was during those moments that Nicole proved to be more than a friend, she didn't desert me but6 helped me to heal and I remember one time I locked myself in the bathroom sniffing cocaine when I became so high and almost drowned in the tab but Nicole saved me, I would have lost my life then but she helped me out, I went for counseling after that and dad dealt with Max with each passing day Nicole stood by me without judging me at all.
I got to her house feeling so lost and confused I parked the car outside and walked in.
"Hey Nicole" I greeted as soon as I spotted her
"If it isn't my best friend, hey babe" she smiled but I didn't smile back.
"Tsup, you don't look fine is it Chard again?
"Yes" I nodded my head waiting for her reaction
"Babe you need to loosen up a bit, forget Chard he is not good for you oh"
"But he is good for you?"
"Good for me? How?" she asked surprised
"When were you going to tell me you have been seeing Chard?"
"I haven't been seeing him, it's not like that"
"Nicole I trusted you, I told you everything about me, I let you get close because I thought you were worth it but to go behind my back like this hurts badly" I said as I threw the photos in her face
"Oh my Nora, I can explain this is all a big misunderstanding, it's not as it looks "
"I am all ears"
"I, well, uhm, I met Chard at the conference and he immediately started hitting on me, I didn't even know who he was at first but when I knew he was your chard I told him to back off"
"Why didn't you tell me about it?"
"I wanted to but I didn't know how you would take it"
"If it was as innocent as you say it is you would have told me but no you kept seeing him , going on kissing sprees and now that maggot has the audacity to tell me he loves you, like really he has known you for two seconds and he says its love"
"Nora I still insist you let go of Chard"
"Nonsense Nicole, you want me to let go so you can have him huh?" I yelled
"No I don't want him, I have Carlos and I love him"
"Does Carlos know about this?"
"Nora calm down please"
"I can't calm down demit I trusted you, I believed in you and now this"
"I am sorry Nora for not telling you but I swear I don't want Chard I don't feel anything for him at all"
"Nicole for your own good stay away from Chard, erase his number, block him forget you ever met him, forget this stupid kiss and I will let this pass, I don't do warnings but since you are my friend I will pretend this never happened"
"Nora I am sorry I didn't mean for any of this to happen"
"Should I find out you are still seeing him, I swear you won't like the other side of me" I said and walked out
"Nora wait" she called out
"What?"
"Are we still friends?" "That will be determined by you"
I walked out of Nicole's house feeling so annoyed, I would have strangled her to death if she wasn't my friend but I had to restrain myself , my hands were shaking and my heart was ready to spill blood, I got my phone and dialed ba Jacob's number before driving off.
"Ba Jaco"
"Nora baby"
"Continue following him and please give me daily updates"
"Done"
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I was very furious with Chard for bringing a rift between Nicole and I, how was I going to win back her trust? I was worried about her and I had to make things right by cutting all ties with Chard, I couldn't afford to lose my best friend over a man, it just wasn't worth it. I got my phone and dialed Chard's line.
"My lady" he answered
"I am not your lady Chard, we need to talk"
"Should I come over to your house?"
"No, Chard this stupidity of yours has to come to an end, I love Nora and I don't want her hating me because of you"
"Meaning?"
"I don't want you, I have never wanted you, the kiss was a mistake it was just a moment of weakness on my part so delete my line erase me from your mind and let's pretend we never met please"
"You can't ask me that"
"I am doing just that, continue what you have with Nora and leave me alone, I belong to someone else"
"No" he said before hanging up
After that call, I started cooking while thinking of how I would make Nora forgive me, my thoughts where rudely disturbed by someone hooting at the gate, I switched of the stove and went to check who it was and behold the mighty chard was at my gate.
"Gosh Chard what do you want?" I asked when I walked out
"You?"
"No this is nonsense, leave me alone"
"I can't leave you alone I want you to be mine"
"Demit Chard this is absurd please go before anyone sees you" I said
"Nicole I love you"
"I don't love you and now you are being a pest please leave"
"Okay let me hug you before I leave"
"No"
"Then I won't leave I will wait here oh night"
I quickly hugged him knowing Carlos would come over in the nest few minutes, he left and promised not to bother me after that. I walked back to the house and continued cooking.
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