Quest Reviews (CLOSED FOR CATCH UP)

Abeeha's review

Review by Abeeha_32

Title: Love, pierce

Author: kween913

Cover+ Title:

I love the picture you've chosen. It's beautiful, specially with the subtle and elegant choice of colors. The font and spacing are well done and the message is beautifully conveyed in the way you want it to be. It gives off magical vibes, especially with the magic wand in the girl's hands. Nicely done. The author's name is also clear and easy to read. I have a suggestion for the cover. You can include a little tagline that defines the concept of your book, i.e., a subtitle. It'll definitely enhance the cover's beauty and make it appear even more attractive.

I can't say much about the title because it is co-related with a letter (you've mentioned in the prologue), but I can say for one thing that if the centre of focus in your book is the letter, then it's a total thumbs up.

Blurb:

The blurb is well-written. I really like the way you've started it, with the definition of Hope. It's not cliché and well executed. There are some minor errors with grammar which I'm pointing out:

After writing 'HOPE: ' you've started the sentence with a small letter. It should go like 'Hope is being able to see...' and not 'hope is being able to see.'

So what happens...when it starts to fade.
Correction: So what happens...when it starts to fade ?
There has to be a question mark at the end since you've started it with the word 'WHAT'

One have to fight for what theirs.
Correction: One has to fight for what is theirs.

First of all, it will be 'has to fight' and not 'have to fight'
Secondly, 'what theirs' sounds grammatically incorrect. I suggest you to change it to 'what is theirs'.

Grammar + Writing Style:
I like the writing style. The vocabulary used is simple (sometimes a bit too simple) but it's easy to follow. It's written in a very intriguing manner, making it extremely-relatable and well-executed. There were a few errors I found regarding grammar. I suggest you to keep these points in mind while writing:

Prologue

Love is a strange and powerful thing. One minute is there and the next is gone.

Correction: Love is a strange and powerful thing. One minute IT is there and the next, IT is gone.

The usage of the pronoun IT makes it more structured and less clumsy.

Chapter-1

Whether their dumb or not.

Correction: Whether THEY'RE dumb or not.
Be careful with the usage of the correct form of the words instead of using their homophones.

Big ugly phobias that has refused us...

Correction: Big(,) ugly phobias that HAVE 'refrained' us...

After big, consider putting a comma (,). The word 'hasn't should be replaced with 'have'.
'Refused' is not the appropriate word that should be used here. Consider switching it with the word 'refrained'.

Go on where listening.

Correction: Go on (,) WE'RE listening.

Make atleast a five friends.

Correction: Make at least five friends.

The use of the word 'a' makes the sentence grammatically incorrect. I suggest you to eradicate it.
There should be a space between 'at' and 'least'.

Pain was evident in our faces.

Correction: Pain was evident ON our faces.
The preposition 'in' should be replaced with 'on'.

There were a lot of spaces in some lines. It is something really trivial but it makes your writing seem unnecessarily wrongly-executed even though it's correct.

Lastly, there were some problems with the capitalization of letters after a full stop or when starting a new dialogue.

Characters:

I don't have anything to say about this particular section, the reason being that you have published just one chapter and there has been no character exposition as yet.
I can however say for one thing that the characters seem relatable to me, especially with the anxiety issues they have. Well done! The parents seem real chill and it has managed to create a very heartwarming atmosphere, specially for the bunch of teens trying your book.

Plot:
I can't decipher what twists the story will take but I guess it's going to be amazing. The blurb has given me a lot of hope. The plot seems refreshing, unlike any other cliche bad boy or billionaire story. The mysterious elements you've added with the introduction of the love, pierce letters is impeccable (I must say).

Overall enjoyment: It was a light and extremely short read, nonetheless I enjoyed reading it. I feel the plot is concrete and the story has a lot of potential. Mind the issues regarding grammar and your book will be good to go. I hope this review was helpful and I wish you all the very best for all your future writing experiences.
Until next time♥️