Chapter 35

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Annie's POV
*3 Months Later*

My eyes shot open and I straightened up in bed.

I pushed my sweaty hair out of my face, letting my breath out slowly.

Another nightmare. Everytime I closed my eyes, it was always a nightmare. I leant across the bed and flicked on my lap, the light giving me a moment of safety.

My heart was still hammering and I got out of bed, and wandered down the corridor to my Mom's bedroom. The nightly routine this has become.

"Mom?" I whispered, poking my head through the door.

I heard my Mom stir and she sat up in bed, pulling her eye mask up.

"Annie?" She mumbled, yawning.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," I said quietly and she shook her head, flicking back the covers.

"No it's okay, honey, hop in." She said and I swallowed, going over to her and climbing in beside her.

She put an arm around my shoulder and kissed my forehead.

"What was it about this time?" She asked and I swallowed, blinking back my tears.

"Calum... they're always about Calum." I whispered and she rubbed my arm. She kissed my cheek, and we shared a silence for a few minutes, and then I spoke up, saying what was really on my mind for the past few weeks.

"Mom... why do you think Luke hasn't called?" I asked and my Mom paused.

"I don't know darling." She mumbled, sleepily, as she yawned again.

"Maybe he wants to give you some space?" She said, and I bit my lip, turning over in the bed. I held back the tears, and turned back to talk to my Mom some more, but saw her eyes closed as she had drifted back to sleep. 

That looked nice. 

It had been so long since I had properly slept. I get one, two hours at most, before being awoken by nightmares. For those two weeks after The Chase, when Luke was still around, the nightmares weren't as intense. 

Having someone there to talk through who had gone through the same thing was comforting. But he was gone now, and I had no one who understands. Mom forced me along to a victims therapy group, but they had gone through their own traumas, and nobody's trauma was the same.

I was now more alone than I ever was. 

I sighed quietly, as I heard my Mom start to snore quietly beside me. I carefully moved the duvet, heading back down the hallway to my room. I closed the door, turning on the light, and fished out a hoodie and a pair of trainers from my wardrobe.

I quietly walked down the stairs, and used my key to let myself out the back door, and started to walk. 

I didn't know where I was going. 

I didn't care.

Thoughts were whirling through my head, just like they always did, this time the flashbacks of Calum's death replaying in front of my eyes. I placed my hands over my face, rubbing my eyes, and pushing the tears back once again. 

The night air was damp, light drizzle floating in the air, and I pulled my hood closer around my face. The streetlights lit up the empty streets with an orange glow, and I arrived at the town bridge. I walked along it, kicking a few stray stones out of my way, and stopped at the middle of the bridge, looking down at the fast flowing river underneath. 

I leant against the railing, closing my eyes, this time Phoebe's death flashing back into my mind. I grasped at my head, shaking it, trying to get these flashbacks out of my mind. I didn't tell my Mom about them. I didn't tell anyone. 

Chase // 5sos A.U. //Where stories live. Discover now