Chapter 21

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I don't remember much from my accident.  When I woke up almost a month and a half later, it felt like no time had passed at all.  When I kissed Camila last night after giving her a hard time for not knowing her, it felt like I had just kissed her the day before.  We didn't kiss for long, but I was so happy to wake up and see her there, by my side. 

The doctor told me that even though I was in a coma, I might have been able to hear things and feel sensations of people around me.  I think I definitely could sense Camila everyday.  I know before I got woken up I could hear her.  Whispering in my ear how much she wanted me to come back to her.  Never in a million years did I think I would hear that from her.

Today has been full of cognitive function tests, labs, scans.. you name it. Apparently my accident was bad enough I needed surgery and I have multiple people looking at me throughout the day to make sure I don't have another seizure, or worse a stroke and possibly die.  I can't walk right now and will have to undergo many months of intense therapy both physically and mentally.  Apparently I had also lost a lot of blood while the doctors decided that was enough for me to know for today, I could just sense there was so much more people were not telling me.

Camila has been watching everyone like a hawk and when we are alone in my room, she's snuggled into my side as we watch TV or sleep. Aaliyah told me when I sent Camila home to shower that Camila indeed had been by my side the whole time and that most days she barely ate or slept. It made me a little sick to my stomach to think about. Another part of me keeps asking myself what I've done to earn her forgiveness and earn her trust back.. I'm silently praying she's not here just because she feels bad and we really don't have anything going on..

Yeah....I know that's stupid...

I think to myself how lucky I am and as Camila enters my room again wearing an old race shirt and sweats, all I can think about is how badly I want to get out of here and be able to take her on proper dates and not have to worry about kissing her with sets of wandering eyes watching us.

"Hey hot shot!" She says as she walks to sit in the chair next to me.  She's carrying a bag with her and I'm curious as to what's inside.  "Hey beautiful!" I reply as I pout and point to my lips.

She smirks at me, but leans over and our lips meet.  I think kissing her is going to be my favorite activity; recovery or not.

Once we break apart, she climbs onto the bed next to me and grabs her bag.  Inside is her laptop and some things she needs for herself.  She pulls out her headphones and hands me one as she plugs them into the laptop.

"Are you sure Shawn? She asks. "We don't have to do this now." She's says reassuringly.

"I know, but I need to see what happened." I say firmly.

"I really don't think this is a good idea baby." She says as her fingers grace my cheek and she reaches forward to kiss my lips again.  "I don't want to relive those memories right now.  We almost lost you, and you literally just woke up....I....I can't Shawn." She says quietly as she looks away.

My heart is pounding and my body feels....well considering I can't feel half of my body right now, I don't know how I feel, but...

"You called me baby......" I let the thought linger between us as I gently turn her face back to mine.  Her eyes look sad, like she could burst into tears at any moment.

"You've never called me baby before.  Did you call me baby while I was out?" I ask.  I'm curious.

Her beautiful chocolate brown eyes meet mine, there's a dull sparkle in them.  A hint of something she's never given me access to.  I mean, up until recently, I've never really had access to any of her or her emotions except for hesitancy and hate.

Taking a deep breath and letting it out, she replies "Yes.....I called you baby when you were in the coma.  I don't know why, but I felt like maybe you would hear me and it would help you come back to me if you knew that when...if...you woke up, I'd be right here, waiting and ready for you." She sighs.  "I know I've spent my whole life living as independently as possible and I've never needed a man to be happy, but I can feel you changing Shawn.  You're not the same boy you were that left me broken hearted all those years ago.  I guess.......I guess I just....after your accident when they were getting you out of the car, the last thing you said was "Mila," in fact it was the only thing you said before you lost consciousness again.  I knew in that moment I needed to be by your side.  That I wanted to be with you.  That I want to be with you."

I'm looking at her and taking her all in, I can't move my legs, but I can move my arms and I use them to gently grab her by the waist and pull her onto my lap.  She puts her knees on either side of my hips; she's straddling me and after her admitting how she's feeling just now, I feel like I'm on Cloud 9.  This is unreal.  Her body against mine like this.  I've only ever dreamed of having Camila Cabello wrapped around my body; these are less than ideal circumstances, but the fact of the matter is....I spent so long being a fuck boy, but trying to win her back...this moment is one I've been dreaming of, but also one I don't feel worthy of.

Gently grabbing her face between my hands.  They are still weak and trembling but I muster all the strength I have to hold her face close to mine.  "I think....I think I might want to be with you too baby!" I smirk and give her a dangerously sexy smile.  She lets out a small gasp, but returns my smile and the little sparkle in her eyes gets bigger.

"You called me baby...." she hums happily.

"I did.....I like how it sounds." I grin as I bring her face closer to mine.  In fact I don't think I can bring it any closer without kissing her.  I hear her breath hitch as she wraps her arms around the nape of my neck.

Screw it. 

I may not be able to feel much, but the way my hearts hammering out of my chest and my mind is floating on a Camila shaped cloud, I lean forward and kiss her so passionately, so intensely...I hope she realizes I know she meant every word and I know how much it took for her to admit those things to me.  I don't want to take her independence from her and if she decides down the road that I'm not the one, I'll learn to live with it; but for now I'm just going to sit here holding and kissing the girl of my dreams until we get interrupted by yet another visitor.

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A/n:  Still have some big things and tough conversations to have ahead....

What do you think of them calling each other baby?!

Don't forget to vote and comment!  Thanks for reading. 💕

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