Twelve Fifty one

20.

Zack P.O.V

"Son come down stairs, you need to eat" mommy called and immediately entered my room.

I was tired of looking at her. Two days have passed and I still don't leave my room. I also wonder why they are here at home.

"I'm okay, you can leave again" I said coldly.

She sighed and smiled sadly "When your dad and I found out that you were not coming home and in school for two days and we found out you were in the hospital, I was nervous and even in the middle of the meeting your dad, brother and I went to the hospital. I don't know what to do I almost fainted from nervousness wondering why my son is in the hospital.. "

Tears start to form in the corners of my eyes. Then i realized that she's calling me 'son' several times. I turned to her.

"I'm sorry Zack, son. I know we have a lot of miss understanding since you were a child..  I-I didn't know it would be like this I'm sorry. Mommy and daddy will get it back okay" she hugged me.

"I'm sorry son, we will do everything you want as Eli said"

I let go and looked at her confused. Eli?

"W-what do you mean" tears is flow down on my cheek.

She smiled "The day we came home and you left after saying hurtful words.. I saw someone listening to us I saw her reaction and there I remembered the name you said to me 'Eli' she was the only name you mentioned since then. So I knew immediately that she was Eli, she scolded me" she smiled "She said you are not hard to love and your wishes are simple, she said everything you want to do.. You want family" tears flowed in her eyes "That you want us to go to school with you , I'm sorry son and I thank Eli because she is the one who made me realize how much I am a worthless mother- "

I hugged her "Mom" I cried on her shoulder. She recovered and stroked my back.

You are so deceptive Eli. Why do you still worry about me, even if you are not here you are still the reason why mommy and I are like this.

"And when we were in the hospital, before she lost her life..." She let go and wiped the tears from my eyes. "She told us to take care of you, that you are stubborn but you are nice to be with... He said how excited you are with your dad lifting you up, and she wants me to give you something.." I frowned. She took something from her pocket. "She said I give it to you when we talk, last time I wanted to give it but you can't talk properly" she handed me the folded white paper.

I picked it up and stared. "She's a very good child, I can't even thank her" she rubbed my back. And a few seconds before standing up "Eat son, Eli will definitely be sad when I leave you and not feed"

I looked up at her and smiled sadly. "I-I will follow"

She nodded. She turned around before finally leaving.

I stared at the paper and inadvertently shed it with tears. I wiped my tears before slowly opening the paper. And immediately my tears flowed as I read the words.

Dear my one and only ugly bestfriend,

I don't know how to say it but I am sure that when you read it I am gone, hmm yes I am no longer, I feel it, my death. And sorry because I didn't say my condition because I know you will just worry. Sorry bestfriend I can't say but I know you already know everything now and hopefully when you read this don't cry because you're so ugly when crying.

Thank you for being my bestfriend, you are the best and thank you for everything you did for me and for mommy. I hope when I am gone, you and your family will be fine because I am no longer there to help you when you dramatize about them. I can no longer accompany you to the playground in our cradle, and I hope you still go there because we have many memories of that place, we used to fall into the cradle when riding because we could not reach.

Take care of yourself even if I am no longer there Lovely is still there and please watch over her because she is also flirtatious, I do not want you to cry I hope you are happy and do not think of me always because even if you do not see me promise I will watch over you. Study hard and fulfill your dreams. Visit mommy at home Dad is not there so he has no one else besides Linda our maid and her baked ones. Do not despair because I am sure you and your family will get along. Fighting!

And before everyone gets done I have something to say. I can't say in person because I know it's too vague and it's too late. I really loved Ralph but you are the reason why I answered him. Because... I like you Zack, since before, you were the first to make my heart beat. I want to say but when I found out I had cancer and my life was only short, I was weakened. What else would I do if I also disappeared and I was also afraid that you would think differently of me when I told you. When Ralph and I broke up I was hurt but I cried more because I was scared, Ralph is gone what if you notice I like you. I don't want to lose you to me so I did not say that I like you more than friends, I'm sorry. I loved Ralph but I did not lose you in my heart that is the truth.

There I already said. I just forced mommy for this so I hope you can forgive me. Don't cry because I am happy with everything that happened to us as friends I'm sorry if I worried you. I miss you. I can't do that until now. Iloveyou bestfriend. Just say my love to Lovely and Drei. Also to aunt and uncle  Take care and keep safe. Bye.

Your Dear Princess Eli.

My tears flowed and the paper was almost wrinkled.

"Eli!" I cried in extreme pain. She like me! Why you did not say.

"I'm idiot! idiot idiot! I-I wish I had said that I like you.. you are so deceptive! W-why do you have to keep it a secret" I cried and hugged the paper.

Why am I to coward to say how I feel. Why can't we tell each other what we really feels like. Why? The pain is tormenting me, this is the most painful for me like to break the glass that fell on the rooftop. Crushed in
to pieces. I blame myself for not admitting. Why I'm so coward! If I had just said it earlier, I would have known that we both feel the same way. I'm so stupid! I'm so stupid! As long as I live I will blame myself.

"Eli... It hurts so much w-why do you have to hide... I'm idiot, I'm idiot!" My voice growled as I shouted to myself.

The door opened and mom, dad and brother hurried out. They immediately attended me.

"Son Zack" mommy hugged me. I also felt dad's hand on my back.

"I'm idiot mom, I-I didn't say how much I love her it's to late" I sobbed. I can no longer take the pain.

"Zack" Dad stroked my back.

"Shhh.. don't cry Zack"

I see my older brother holding a glass of water giving by the maid. He was looking at me.

"Mom h-how long will I be hurt like this"

"Shhh"

"S-she has so many secrets, I always tell her all my problems why she doesn't trust me"

"Zack, not everything you want will come to you, even if you are already there and you feel the same. If you are not for each other, you will not be"

My tears flowed more. "It's so painful  mom, dad... I can't help it like I just want to disappear-"

"Don't say that Zack" Dad scolded.

"How about us, yes we have many miss understanding but I do not want to lose you. You are my youngest son. I want to make up. Do not say that because I will be hurt more when you disappear, when I thought you were in the hospital, I almost die of nervousness. And Eli asked that we take care of you and I will fulfill it.. Even that is all I can do for Eli. So I hope you don't think badly because I love you. We love you. "

I cried and cried. This is what I've been waiting for and Eli is right. She was right again because my family and I got along but she was not here. This is what I want the parents and my family hug and the words they say. I hope you see this Eli because you are the reason why they are here next to me now. Even you're gone, you are still guiding me. Thanks. My dear princess.