Tinder - [Lando Norris]

2.9 || the regret

Dagmar regretted everything she said to Lando as soon as she came home and had calmed down a little. She had nearly made a scene in the restaurant and she embarrassed not only herself, but also Lando. She had reacted to him in emotion and she couldn't really find an approach to him when he said he missed them being together. Something she missed so badly as well. Dagmar hadn't shed a tear over the past weeks she had spend alone, trying to get over Lando, however now she felt her eyes getting watery and the tears drowned her sight before she could notice it properly. She felt silly and stupid for crying about something she had created herself this day, yet she still let out all of the pent up emotions and feelings. Dagmar took a deep breath and dried her face and the corners of her eyes. She let out a huff of air and let herself fall back on her bed. This situation was messed up and at the moment she didn't know how to fix it.

It had been a better idea if they never met up today. It had been a better idea if she never got drunk and never send that stupid voicemail. Dagmar regretted everything from that first moment on that caused everything to roll into this mess she was in now. She never meant to say that they were just a Tinder match. Lando had been her first and forever love and he meant so much more than that stupid app they had met each other on. She took a deep breath, wanting herself to stop crying like a child. Dagmar closed her eyes, thinking. She needed time. A lot more time than a month to see him again. His schedule was busy and it was probably better if they just didn't see each other or spoke to each other anymore. Being friends was currently risky. She needed to get over him. But you never really get over your first love, do you? Dagmar sat up again and she undressed herself to take a shower.

Because of her last year of her study at the London University, she had to write her bachelor thesis and it was starting now. She had a lot of time to finish it, but she wanted to deliver good results. She just finished her exam period and her grades were fine as always. Dagmar was glad the whole situation with Lando hadn't directed her thoughts while she was making important school work. Dagmar took a shower to refresh her mind, she got into some comfortable clothing and she settled behind her desk after she put some music on. She briefly stared out of the window, looking over the busy streets of UK's capital city. Dagmar opened her laptop and she started up the research proposal she had made, which included some notes and improvements from her teacher. She's going to use that for her eventual research. She opened a brand new, clean document and her eyes glanced over the blank page in Word. And she knew what she needed. A brand new, unwritten page of the next chapter in life.

Lando's life went on after their distaster lunch as well. Nevertheless he regretted the suggestion to meet up again after such a short period of them both adjusting to not being together anymore. He went on a run more often to clear his head and so he did this morning. The air was fresh and he pulled the sleeves of his hoodie into his hand while he ran through the muddy path of the forrest. He had his headphones on his head and he looked down at the path while he ran. His breath was steady and he could tell his heartbeat was too. There was something gnawing at his chest ever since Dagmar left him at the restaurant. He had the feeling as if he should apologize for letting them meet up. At the same time he felt like he had to ask for an apology. The way she had reacted wasn't needed. He had constantly thought they needed more time before they could properly talk, however while his frustration build up, his opinion changed and me maybe thought it would be better to fight it out.

He didn't really talk much about the break up towards his trainer and team. They had asked when Dagmar would visit them at a race and he had shrugged, telling she was busy with school and she didn't have much time, that their relationship was far on the background. Lando still felt out of his rhythm, while his race results were fine and he felt comfortable in the car. Lando continued his run till he had done a lap of 10 kilometers and he contently sat down on his sofa in the garden, his legs up on the pillows. He leaned back with his phone. He hated how he constantly wanted to re-read their texts, look at the pictures they made together, which were only three or four, but still. His thumb selected the few pictures and his finger hovered over the button to delete them, but he still didn't. Lando sighed deeply and placed his phone next to him on the sofa. Lando looked up at the blue sky and if he concentrated really hard on his feelings, he was feeling lonely. By now it had been two weeks since the incident at the restaurant and he just wanted to know how she was doing.

She hadn't posted anything on instagram, her facebook was as empty as it was before and her friend's profile didn't share anything of them two together either. He hoped she was doing fine and he chuckled at himself. He was the one who suggested it would be better to break up, but now he was probably the one who wanted to get back together so dearly. Correction, he never wanted to break up with her in the first place, but he wouldn't know how to comfort her while he was away and she couldn't join him all the time. And it broke his heart to know she was missing him all the time so badly. It was clear, he missed her. So freaking much. And maybe this was hurting only more.

The raceweeks and his training with Jon in between helped little by little to get over it all. He hadn't spoken to Dagmar since May and it was the start of July by now. The amount of time had done them both well. Lando still wanted to contact her, ask her out so they could catch up in a good environment this time, but something held him back every single time his thumbs hovered over the keyboard. Everything had gone so quickly, too quickly for his feeling. The sudden breakup, the sudden escalating events, the feelings that were all over the place. He knew she was about to graduate this year and he wanted to know if she was going back to Norway after the summer, or even during the summer, if there was even a chance to ever see her again. The summer holidays were nearing for him as well. He was going away with some friends after Hungary, the last race of the first half. He looked forward to relax a couple weeks, it had been hectic season and his private life hadn't been any less soft on him either.

Lando spend time in his apartment in London between the Austrian weekend and the Silverstone weekend and while he, for once, had an evening where he was watching some Netflix instead of gaming and streaming. His phone rang and he looked over at the screen, expecting it to be one of the guys asking why he wasn't online. However, it was an anonymous number and he looked at it for a moment and then decided to pick up. "Hey, it's Lando". He spoke into the phone. "Hey, Lando. I hope I'm not bothering you on this Thursday evening. I'm Sarah, a friend of Dagmar's". Lando's heart skipped a beat as it was the first sign of somewhat contact with Dagmar's environment. "Is everything alright?". He asked, sitting up a little more straight. "It's quite okay. The amount of time that girl takes to get over one guy is insane though". Sarah replied and he chuckled lightly. "Anyways, she's admitting more and more that she's regretting the breakup. We were planning a summer trip and she totally zoned out". He listened as she continued.

"Our gradutation is on July 19, it's a Friday. We have a ceremony and a party, I thought it would be a nice surprise to let you come. I'm sure she won't get mad like the previous time you guys tried to talk". Sarah spoke. Lando was silent for a couple seconds. "I don't want to ruin the party for you". He said, thinking if it was a good decision or not. "Look, graduating from university is one of her biggest days ever. Her family sadly can't come. I'd just really like it if you guys could solve your stuff on that day". Sarah continued and it eventually convinced him. "July 19 you said?". Lando asked. "Yup". "By the way, how did you get my number?". He asked. "Got it from Dagmar's phone when she wasn't looking". Sarah giggled. Good, Dagmar hadn't deleted his number. "Alright, I'll be there". Lando nodded at himself. "Hey, Sarah? Thanks for calling". He said. "No problem. See you then!". Sarah hung up the phone afterwards and Lando leaned his head back against the pillows of the sofa. He was already nervous at the thought of how Dagmar would react to it all, but at the moment, he couldn't wait till it was the 19th of July.