The Fragile the Broken and the Brave

32. Emergency

8.16.20

Benji's POV

"Step with right, blast with both hands then bring your left foot up to your right. It's as simple as that, Benjamin."

"Can we just take a break? My body hurts."

"No. Run the routine one more time."

"Fine." I stood with my body square, and I took a large breath before putting my right foot forward. I allowed the magic to build up in the back of my mind, and I used my forward momentum to propel it into the real world. However, when it came to it being actually produced, all I could get was a sad, red spark that twisted a bit and died as soon as the air touched it. I swear I followed all of the instructions, so why is none of this working!?

"Benji, you have to feel the power travel all of the way through you. If you just feel it from the back of the head directly to the palm, it'll get lost in your body with all of the obstruction from your organs. Watch me again." Ms. Harring slowly took the stance I had been perfecting for hours, and I saw her eyes glinting in focus. She took a step with her right foot, and I saw it twist a bit on the concrete floor. Her left palm shot forward in a fluid motion, and the green colored water of her magic slashed forward like a whip. That movement cut a hole right down the center of the target, but she wasn't done then. She thrust her right hand forward directly after the left, and it managed to split the target into nearly exact fourths. I know that I'm untrained and not very skilled, but I'm definitely jealous of her elegance and poise even though she was pushing magic through her system. Finally, her left foot slid forward to her right, and she ended back in the stance she started in. "Magic is hard. With math and science, you can be shown the right way physically. It's like that with combat, too. A simple demonstration is usually enough to show someone the proper way to strike or use their weapon. With a warlock's magic, it isn't nearly as simple. Not only is everything mental, but everyone is slightly different. Things that work for me and other students may not necessarily work for you. All I can do is give you a guide and pray that it works; past that, it's all on you. There's a reason warlocks are usually so independent; we require it to get past our initial education."

"So I should try it however I see fit?"

"Yes. You need to trust your instincts, or you're never going to make it. The people that have the greatest power are usually the most isolated; we spend such a long time trying to harness our magic to our full ability that we forget what really matters in life. It took me a long time to learn that I need to listen to only myself. It's why I became a teacher. I want to help other kids like me not end up being so lonely in life when they grown up."

"Alright, I think I'm prepared to try again."

"Good luck, Benji. I know that most of the school dislikes you right now, but I see the potential in everything you do. I'm rooting for you." I got into the starting position clumsily, but I managed to steady myself within a few seconds. My entire body was calm, relaxed, and encouraged by my teacher's words, and I allowed that positivity to take over my mind space. My right foot stepped forward at a twenty-five degree angle as instructed, and I used the momentum once again to push the magic through my body. This time, instead of just imagining it from my palm, I felt it pass through my heart and lungs on its path to the outside world. The feeling left me with a lasting comfort, and I internalized it before focusing on the task at hand. The red crackle began at my finger tips, and I felt the buzz surrounding my every appendage. It was powerful, but controllable with the right tools. The tools that I happened to have. The crackle suddenly turned into a bolt, but it only took me a few seconds to recognize that I didn't really have the tools to control it. Lightning is so unpredictable; one wrong move and I could kill someone. The bolt suddenly dissipated right before it could hit the target, and Ms. Harring looked at me again. "What happened? You were so close."

"I got scared..."

"Why?"

"It's embarrassing, but I don't like the unpredictability of my own magic."

"Those feelings aren't silly, Benjamin. In fact, they're completely healthy. A lesser man wouldn't care that he could hurt himself or someone else using his magic. You have ambition to be the best, but not an unhealthy amount. It seems to be very balanced."

"Is it okay to be scared of my own magic?"

"Take a seat on the floor." I followed the instructions immediately, and she sat down in front of me. I don't think they predict this to be what we're doing in our magic class, but they can deal with it! "Benjamin, as of right now, you're young and untrained. It's normal to feel fear, especially with an ability as nerve wracking as electricity. You need to understand that everything in this school is in a controlled environment designed to help you. In the real world, its only human to fear hurting someone, but here it is quite actually impossible. Our job is to help you get used to your magic so that there aren't any accidents out there where there's consequences for messing up. You have an amazing power, and I would love to see you grow into using it. I can't force you to, but I want you to get better at it. Maybe you can fix your reputation blip?"

"Or I'll destroy the whole school and make everything 100x worse."

"It'll be okay."

"You don't know that for sure."

"No, but I'm very confident in you."

"Why? I've shown no value of ever being useful."

"No one is useless until they've given up hope. It'll be your guide through the hardest time, and your harness in happy days. Now get up and try again; that's all you can do."

"I guess so." I stood up and began to get into position, but I was suddenly knocked off of my feet by a huge rumble throughout the school. My body plummeted towards the floor, and I was glad that the teacher was there to catch me; that would have hurt a lot. Soon, an alarm began to blare loudly in my ears, and I threw my hands over my ears. Of course, the noise was inside of my head, so I couldn't block it out that simply. "Whats happening!?" I screamed over it, and Ms. Harring looked at me with a dire expression.

"Benji, stay here."

"Why!?"

"There's a supernatural emergency; that's what the alarm means. Something very serious is going on, and they need help from all of the teachers and more advanced students."

"So I can't help?"

"No. Now promise you'll stay put."

"Fine, I promise."