𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐏 𝐌𝐄 :: 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣

二十六

september 13th, 2017
7:30pm

chan and minho stayed in the cafe for almost an hour until they decided to leave and head to the beach where they could enjoy some peace and talk about whatever they wanted. they both sat down on some rocks near the sea and stayed silent for some minutes, staring at the beautiful waves hitting the rocks they were sitting on.

after some time though, minho decided to break the silence and turned to chan, who was still looking at the sea with a small smile plastered on his face. the younger just admired the elder's beautiful face silently, thinking about the good and bad moments they shared together.

chan had always been there for minho from the very beginning. and the younger really appreciated that. he wanted chan to stay in his life. he wanted for once, someone he really cared about to stay and not leave like everyone else did. the boy wouldn't be able to stand it if chan left too. he would probably completely lose it.

minho had been staring at chan for so long that he hadn't even realised that the elder was now looking at him as well.

"minnie" chan spoke softly and minho quickly averted his gaze as soon as he realised that chan was looking at him and cleared his throat. chan had just caught him staring. minhos ears turned red.

"wow why are your ears red? are you cold?" chan chuckled . of course he knew why his ears were red but he just wanted to tease the younger.

"shut up" minho quietly said and lightly slapped chans shoulder. the elder could only laugh at this.

"you are really cute min." chan said again and minho turned his head and tsked.

"stop joking"

"i am not joking." chan said, this time a serious tone in his voice. "you're cute minho. and so so beautiful. you are probably the prettiest person ive ever seen in my life. and you're so kind as well. im so glad i met you."

minho let out a bitter chuckle and looked at the sand, picking some up with his fingers, then letting it slowly fall down again. "please stop lying. im not beautiful or cute. im ugly and so fucking pathetic. ive made you get worried so many times and you cried because of me. im just hurting you and you don't deserve that. i should have never texted you."

chan noticed minhos voice getting quieter with each word he said and his eyes were also glowing. the older boy frowned.

"minho look at me."

"i can't"

chan placed his hand on minhos chin and forcefully lifted his head up, causing their eyes to lock. "don't ever say any of this bullshit again. you're fucking gorgeous and i don't freaking care about you making me cry or whatever. i care for you so fucking much and it hurts me so badly seeing you like this. i know you've gone through a lot and i understand that you don't trust me enough to tell me what's happened to you. but please, if you don't want to hurt me, stay with me and don't say things like these."

minho just nodded and gulped slowly. he was actually scared. he had never seen this side of chan before and he didn't like it. he wanted the sweet and kind chan to come back.

chan left minhos chin and sighed deeply. he knew he accidentally scared the younger with his sudden change of behavior but he couldn't stand hearing minho downgrading himself anymore.

the elder looked back at minho and he noticed a tear rolling down on his cheek, but the younger quickly wiped it away and looked down.

great chan you made him cry.

"minho" the blonde boy put his hand on the youngers shoulder and pulled him closer to him. "im sorry for snapping but i couldn't take your words any longer. i don't like hearing you saying so hateful things about yourself"

minho looked at him and smiled sadly. "it's fine hyung. im just a crybaby. it's not your fault im always crying whenever im under pressure. it's just me."

"stop blaming yourself about everything that's happening! it's not your fault! none of what you've been through is your fault!"

minho pulled away from chan's arms and stood up angrily and chan looked at him with widened eyes.

minho was mad.

"everything is my damn fault! whatever happened to me was my fault! all these people leaving me was my fault! and once you learn the truth as well, you're gonna leave me too! so stop pretending that you know everything about me because you know absolutely nothing! you don't know how disgusting and gross i am! i am a pathetic piece of shit and i don't even deserve to be alive! i don't even know why i haven't killed myself yet after all these years of hatred and disgust i was getting from everyone surrounding me! i don't even fucking know why i haven't acknowledged how problematic and shitty i am yet! im literally the dumbest person alive! "

~~~

um

hi

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