Once More With Feeling ZAINTSEE AU

First Time Again

Yep, Saint was so done. He had everything he wanted to accomplish in his head, even if it was just getting dressed and talking to Zee, he still had a plan. Then he walks in and finds a basically naked, chiselled god in front of him and his brain blanks out. He knew he was stood there mouth agape and drooling but his brain was off line right now so there was nothing he could really do about it. Zee stared at Saint, wondering what was wrong, until he saw Saint was totally checking him out. He'd seen Saint on the prowl before so he knew that look well but it had never been aimed at him before. Then he noticed Saint was only in a towel himself and his mind started to wander dangerously

Before Zee's cheeks caught fire he quickly pulled on his top and shorts before leaving Saint alone in the room to get dressed. What ever needed saying could be said when they were both fully dressed and less agitated. He walked to the kitchen and started cooking, that always helped Zee to relax and he knew Saint was always happier with a full stomach. He decided to prepare omelette with rice and pork and basil stir fry. Zee was busy chopping and frying when Saint arrived in the kitchen. He didn't say a word just filled the kettle and began making tea, that was always the way they worked, Zee cooked and Saint made drinks. They both found comfort in the old routine.

Saint set the table hating himself for making things awkward between him and his best friend. Zee brought over the food and set it down on the table. "I'm sorry..." they both said simultaneously. "Why?" They again said in unison with almost identical looks of confusion on their faces. Zee put his hands up. "You can go first Saint." He said feeling his cheeks heating up again. Great, thought Saint, does he always have to be such a gentleman. "Erm well..." he began. "I'm sorry for freaking out at you and kissing you and making things weird between us..." Saint blurted out desperate to get things resolved as quickly as possible.

"I already told you all that is fine Saint. I want to you to feel safe enough to let go when you're with me. I want to be the one you come to and that will never change." Saint could feel a tear threatening to fall. "Now I need to say sorry. Firstly I'm sorry for letting you open the door to that monster, I should have looked after you better. Secondly I'm sorry if I didn't say enough or said the wrong thing when you were letting it all out I just..." Zee was cut off by a loud "NOPE!" from Saint. "You're apologising for stuff that isn't your fault or just didn't happen. So what of we both agree that we're fine and go back to normal?" Saint finished shyly. Zee beamed at him "Sounds good to me." Zee said. "Now let's eat before it goes cold."

The remainder of the day was spent on the sofa huddled together watching Anime and basically chilling out. Saint would be lying if he said bed time wasn't embarrassing. If it wasn't for the fact every little noise was making him jump he might have even considered sleeping alone but the thought of not being in Zee's arms was enough to make him swallow his embarrassment and head straight to their bed after brushing his teeth. Once he was back in Zee's embrace Saint wondered how he had ever not slept this way. Being surrounded by this comforting and familiar scent and feeling the warmth of Zee's skin as he listened to his heartbeat gave Saint feelings he couldn't describe.

Zee lay there in the darkness holding Saint in his arms. A million thoughts whirling around his mind about what had happened today but he wouldn't say anything out loud in case he scared Saint or added to his troubles. They could deal with all of that in the morning after they'd given their statements to the police. For now he just wanted to hold his precious friend and pretend that he would never have to let him go. Being like this in the dark made Saint feel brave. "Zee..." he whispered. "I'm sorry I ruined our first kiss." Zee was flustered, he'd hoped Saint hadn't picked up on his slip of the tongue about thinking of kissing him. "Uhh..." He said. He was about to apologise when Saint put his finger over his lips.

"Things are so messed up right now..." Saint said moving his face towards Zee's "and there's a lot of things I can't fix but can I try to fix that?" He asked praying his friend would accept his offer, he was surprised at how badly he'd wanted to to since the first time. He slowly moved his hand up to cup Zee's face giving him time to process what he was asking. Zee could barely see Saint in the darkness of the room just a slight glimpse here and there when the moonlight came through the clouds. But even without seeing Saint, he could feel how tense he was at how much he wanted to do this. Zee wanted it to so he decided to just nod and let Saint do whatever he wanted, he trusted him 100% so why not.

It was as if the world began to move in slow motion after Saint felt Zee nod his agreement. He removed his finger from Zee's lips and closed the distance between them until their noses touched and he could smell the mint of Zee's toothpaste. "I love you Zee..." he whispered before gently pressing their mouths together. It was innocent and a little shy but it was perfect and Saint couldn't believe they'd never done this before. He pecked Zee's lips once more then hid his face in the crook of Zee's neck feeling embarrassed at how much he enjoyed the kiss. "I love you too Saint." Zee whispered as they both closed their eyes to sleep.