Saving the Monster

Chapter 63

They cleaned themselves up and then ate the ration packs that Rey had stored before she left.  Rey was grateful for the nourishment they gave, Ben less so, it seemed that he had eaten far better than ration packs and rain water with the First Order.

Rey didn't want to leave the hut, didn't want to leave Ben, she felt safe, protected, loved. She knew that if she ventured out onto the base then she would face questions, judgements. Here, within these walls there was no judgment. She was Rey and he was Ben.

Rey wiped their plates clean and then came to lie next to Ben on the narrow bed. He was lying on his back, one hand behind his head, his eyes fixed on the ceiling. Rey rolled onto her side and kissed his cheek and he turned his head slowly to look at her,

"When I take you and Lando in tomorrow they will separate us. You'll be thrown in a holding cell, you've still got a price on your head for the murder of Snoke, any excuse to hold you, especially now that you won't have my protection on the base anymore. Lando will be interrogated first, a resistance hero, quite a prize..."

Rey propped herself up on one arm, "And you? What will happen to you?" Rey asked, afraid to hear the answer.

Kylo inhaled deeply, his eyes meeting Rey's, "They'll kill me, eventually, once they've finished toying with me, once they've had their fun, once they've made an example of me"

Rey shook her head furiously, "No, no I won't let that happen. I won't let them kill you. Ben we have our bond, remember I managed to find out how to control it. I will be with you, you won't be alone"

Ben reached for the hand that propped up her head and his fingers wrapped around it, some of her hair being caught up too, "Neither will you" he whispered.

They kissed and Rey lay close to him, her head nuzzled into his neck.  Rey's mind drifted back to the last time that Ben had told her that she wasn't alone, all that time ago on Ahch-to.  She had been so sad, so immeasurably lonely and he had said the one thing that she needed to hear, the one thing that could have saved her that night.  Truth was, he had saved her just as much as she'd saved him.  Her stomach flipped thinking about the vision that she had seen that night, the vision of Ben Solo happy, with her, with his mother.  He had to make it back here tomorrow and so did she because the thought of never seeing him again made her chest feel as though it was weighted down, as if she couldn't breathe.

Bens arms tightened around her under the covers and he kissed the top of her head, "Goodnight Rey" he whispered, his deep voice vibrating through his chest.

Rey leant in and kissed his collarbone, "Goodnight Ben"

                         ******************************************
Soft kisses on her shoulder pulled Rey from sleep and she lazily rolled over to face Ben. His eyes were sweeping her face, looking as though he fully expected one of them not to come back, seemingly taking in every inch of her. Rey smiled although her stomach was already doing flips as the details of the day ahead returned to her.

"Do you think there will ever be a world where we can live in peace, without this constant fight?" Rey whispered

Ben smoothed a stray lock of hair from Rey's face and inhaled and exhaled noisily, "I hope so".

They dressed and ate two more ration packs. Ben clipped his saber to his belt and Rey lifted her staff. They were ready but neither wanted to go. They embraced, Rey's ear against his warm chest, hearing his heartbeat thump steadily. They held each other for a moment longer and then Ben pulled away, stooping to plant a soft kiss on the top of Rey's head, before they set off towards the hanger.

The walk was less than pleasant, despite it being a warm day with a soft breeze which blew the palm trees against a morning sun of reds and oranges. All the way along people stopped, stared, talking behind their hands, watching them with a cold suspicion that made Rey want to turn and run back to the safety of the hut again and never come out.   Things got worse when they passed Rose and Connix.  Their faces had darkened and Rose had looked Rey square in the eyes and mouthed "traitor" at her.  Rose was right, she was technically a traitor, but the comment still stung,

"Ready for this?" Lando said as Ben and Rey entered the cave that was serving as a makeshift hanger.  He was stood by Bens shuttle, smartly dressed in cream linen, his body tilted slightly so as to make use of his cane.

Rey smiled, although there was no real joy or humour behind it.  She knew as well as they all did that they might not come back from this.

A noise by the entrance and they turned to see Leia walking slowly towards them.  As ever her head was high and yet Rey could see the fear in her dark eyes.  "Rey, may I have a word?"

Rey nodded, following Leia to the far side of the cavern.  Leia turned to Rey and held both of her hands, "There's something I want you to have".  Rey's brow creased and she watched as Leia reached under her cloak and unclipped something from her belt.  When she brought her hand back out she was holding the legacy lightsaber.  "Take this.  Keep yourself safe, keep Lando safe and keep my son safe.  I want all of you to come home", Rey nodded, taking the saber and blinking back tears.  Leia wrapped her arms tightly around Rey then, "Because this is home.  For you, for Ben, for Lando if he chooses" she whispered into Rey's ear.  Rey nodded again, unable to speak, choked with tears.

"Come on...time to keep our deal with the bad guys!" Lando shouted.

"Always far too keen to head into danger" Leia said with a smile as she embraced Lando.

"You take care of yourself princess" Lando said, patting Leia on the back.  She drew back, her face dark, with just a slight smile playing at her lips, "I'm sorry, you're always going to be princess to me", Lando said, leaning in to kiss her cheek. 

Leia smiled warmly, "Come back in one peiece"

Lando raised his eyebrows and smiled "I'll give it my best shot"

Leia nodded at him and then her attention turned to Ben and she held her hands out to him, "Ben"

Ben walked slowly towards her and they joined hands, "Keep safe" Leia said softly, squeezing his hands, "and come home to me".

Rey watched Bens eyes become glassy and his lip tremble as he spoke,

"Mom....."

Leia cupped his face, her thumb brushing away a stray tear, "Ben I love you. I always have". Leia broke off, her voice cracking,

Ben nodded, "I know"

Lando was already onboard the shuttle and now he leant out of the doorway impatiently, "Come on, we need to make it there before they come this way"

Rey nodded, "Landos right, we need to go"

Leia pulled Ben down to her and kissed his cheek, "Go. We'll be right behind you".