King of Nothing | Taekook

Chapter Sixteen

"Father." I said, poking my head into his quarters. He turned to look at me, but said nothing. I was terrified this morning, thinking of confronting him about hitting our servants, but I always know what his responses will be.

"Why do you hit the servants? You promised me that you would not. Not ever. But you do." I stepped in so he could see me fully. I looked him right in the eyes as I spoke, using a tone of voice that my uncle has taught me before he disappeared. This tone should be used for intimidation purposes. And I'll have to say, it does work.

"Who told you such a thing?" He shook his head and turned away from me.

"I saw you. Last night."

"The boy was stealing, what else would you want me to do?" His tone was mildly condescending, but I held my head high nonetheless.

"Anything but harm them."

"There isn't much else to do, son. You must understand that. You had a kind heart as a child, you didn't understand the responsibilities of having castle servants. You have to keep them disciplined."

"You wouldn't have to discipline if you showed them respect."

"Jungkook. There's no need to discuss this now. I do what must be done to keep order. People will get out of line if there is no discipline. Besides, why do you worry for them? You're not a servant."

Sometimes I wish I were. I thought, knowing that there's a part of me that yearns for a simpler life. Anything but this.

"Answer me, Jeon. Is this because I hit your little friend? And if so, what were you doing out so late? Hm?"

"I was simply going to get a warm towel. I couldn't sleep." I answered. "I happened to see you as I walked by the window."

"The way I run this castle is none of your business."

"It should be, if you're expecting me to run this place after you."

"Ah, getting a little fiesty, are we?"

"You know what, forget it." I sighed, surrendering to his gaze. I can't last against my father for very long. He is one to be feared sometimes. I turned on my heel and left the room, heading straight for the back lot. Taehyung is anxious to know what happens, because he saw how nervous I was this morning.

My stomach felt sick. I hate that I can't be as strong as I would like to be. I'm weak, I'm soft-hearted. I can't run a kingdom like this.

I shook my head.

The thought of this seemingly impending doom on my future has been a constant thought lately. As each day passes, I grow closer to the day that I will have to become king.

But what if I don't want to be a king?

I don't want to be a king.

Not a king of anything. I don't want to own something. Not people, not a castle. I don't want people to work for me, nor to worship me. It's not the life I want to lead.

I do contemplate running away.

However, I wouldn't survive on my own. I'd get three days and have nowhere to go until the guards found me and brought me back.

Taehyung's head perked up the second I stepped out into the gravel. He's learned the sound of my footsteps. He's very attentative to a lot of things.

I knelt down in the dirt next to him and began washing one of the cloths in the tub of water. I like to do this, it gets my mind off of things; makes me feel useful.

"How'd it go?"

"Not well." I looked down at my hands.

"Aw, I'm sorry, Kooks."

"I mean, I told him all the things I said I was going to. But he just used his generic responses. I don't have any power over those. I was so confident last night... I feel so stupid."

"You're not stupid. You confronted your father, you did the best you could and I'm proud of you for that."

"Proud... of me?"

"Yeah, I'm proud of you. Even you admit that your father is scary, and I know you were nervous. But you did it anyways. So, I'm proud of you for that." He pushed his shoulder against mine.

"I haven't heard those words in a very long time." I said, laughing a bit. My little brother is doing so much, and he's so successful and talented. Yet, I, have nothing to offer for my parents to be proud of anymore.

"Oh,"

We pulled the soaking sheets out of the tub and put them into a basket. Usually, after you wash the sheets, it's important to rinse them out in the fresh water of the pond.

"Aside from me, how are you feeling? Does your face hurt at all? What about your arms?" I asked.

"My arms do hurt, just from how much I have to use them throughout the day. My face is fine, though, not bad." His tone became lower.

"Let me see how it's looking," I said, reaching out and gently grabbing his face in my hand. I pulled him closer, pretending to be looking at the abrasion from last night. Instead, I gave him a kiss.

He just laughed and shook his head. I know how to always make him feel better. Making him smile is very easy, but I know it lasts longer if I show him some form of physical affection.

I don't know what to call 'us.' We've been in the same routine for a while now, a little over two months. We kiss, and we hug, we cuddle in bed at night. It's not just a friendship anymore, and that's for certain.

"I don't know if anything I said will make him change, I, in fact, surely doubt it. I'm just going to hope I didn't make it worse." I said.

"I don't think you did, Jungkook. Don't worry about it." He assured me, ringing the water out from one of the white sheets. We sat in silence for a few minutes, just rinsing out the sheets. There's something I want to ask Taehyung, but I don't know how. I guess I'll have to just wait until I can find the correct words. I'll talk to Madame Ji-Sol. Maybe she'll have some kind of answer for me. She usually does.