Maine. A cold, yet bright state in one of the most hated countries in the world. Even in the very end of October, the air is brisk and rough. The lights of the road give me peace as I walk back to my small cottage with a thermos of hot chocolate. I miss everyone, but my poems keep me sane. I finally reach the door of my home and slam the door behind me, stomping my boots clean of snow. A pot of stew is awaiting me by the fire and I'm grateful for the house owner's kindness. Although, it reminds me much of when I would cook for MC. I press my hand to my temple as a pain forms already. "Damn bastard." I snap, forcing the image of him and Sayori into my head. The stew is warm and steamy against my frigid face and I smile as I sit. I eat while I pull up my journal and write about my day. Without any contact or ability to see any of my friends for my health, it's all I have. The blood smeared on the pages is dried and I do my best to fight the memory
_FOUR MONTHS EARLIER_
Yuri pulls from the curb as the man looks down at me. "Monika, come with me." he says, grabbing my arm and turning away. I start to scream, my mind finally snapping. "Break him. Kill him. Murder. Maim." I think immediately. I kick up and I shatter his nose with my elbow as I flip over his shoulder. The man grabs me as I turn to run and I'm dragged inside without another word. I'm thrown into a plane and two suitcases sit beside me. I'm alone, freezing and in a world I cannot manipulate to my own advantages or happiness. I have truly ended up in a perfect hell. I stumble off the barge after a full day of agony. Simple unsalted and cheap foods sit in the pit of my stomach, making me cry for the vegetarian options I'd perfected for myself at home. A joke about Natsuki saying I should be a carnivore, because I'm a maneater, makes my heart ache. The sun shines brightly behind the clouds and a woman escorts me to a wooden little house that I've only ever seen in pictures of the Western part of America. I ask and she tells me I am northeast. I've never heard these words before, I think to myself as I step into my new life, alone. I wrote that night, my mind fuzzy and my hands unsteady. So badly that I cut every finger mutiple times on the pages of my journal, sparking memories of Yuri slicing into my delicate skin. I cried for them, the life I had left and that was taken from me.
_PRESENT DAY_
"I must remain formal to appear sane", I whisper. My ponytail reaches far below my hips now, making any movement difficult. I miss my girls, but there is not much I can do so far away. Yuri sends letters of love and updates, but it is not the same. I curl up into my small cot of blankets and furs, my stew deserted. My companion, a romance novel indented with the pressure of my fingertips. I smile as I open to my favorite scene,warmth flooding my cheeks. The man strokes her sides, his mouth heavy on her full breasts. His opposite hand travels south, causing her to scream with desire. I follow suit on my own body, leading by muscle memory as this is a game I have mastered. Who can you be? Where are you? Who can you claim? Anyone, even though my reality is alone. Because no matter my location, or the feelings someone has for another...it will always be JUST MONIKA.
YOU ARE READING
Just To Be With You #2: Your Reality (DDLC smut collection)
RomanceI thought it was over. But it wasn't, a poem never ends...it's just stops moving like I did.
