Commitment

Part 42

Her plan disintegrated. No point now. Clearly she doesn't have the gumption or the nature to change her attitudes and values overnight! Probably not even during her lifetime, either.

Gray searched her face.

"Don't worry about it." She turned away and reached for her chopsticks. He was starting to relax a bit more. Regan added, "It looks worse than it is."

"You are sure?" He asked gently, and watched her body language. Her body language gave the impression that she was defeated.

"Yes." She nodded faintly and reached for the noodles. "The ice worked," She said quietly, poked the chopsticks into the noodles and reached for a prawn, "it's probably kept the swelling down."

"Ice?" He muttered and rubbed at his forehead. And Gray remembered lunch. She was at the sink, popping ice cubes when he'd been reading her his lecture. He closed his eyes and swore silently. He was an idiot. "You were attacked this morning." Things started to make sense.

"Yes." She was about to eat the prawn when her manners stopped her from speaking with her mouth full of food!

He banked his sigh, as he remembered their earlier conversation, "That's why you didn't turn around when I spoke to you earlier." He murmured. At the time he'd assumed she was being disrespectful and in a snit with him. "Why didn't you tell me?" She said nothing. He got to his feet.

She looked at her cartons and gestured at the cartons with her chopsticks, "Would you like something to eat?"

He shook his head, "Thanks. I already ate." He stared at her. "Why didn't you tell me, this morning?" He ran his fingers through his hair. "I am an idiot! An insensitive idiot." He mumbled feeling guilty he turned his back to her and looked out into the darkness. Regan said nothing in response. Gray sighed, "You need to be more careful."

"I was." She put her noodles down. "It was just an accident." She tried to joke, "Poor timing. And poor luck."

"I know all about that." He muttered and wondered when he would stop remembering that dreadful day in his life, an event that had changed his life. That was all down to timing and poor luck. "Timing. Luck." He looked at the horizon without seeing anything, as his behaviour, towards Regan today, resurfaced. At that time, he was rode by his mood and did not even stop to ask why she was at home, in the middle of the day, pressing out ice cubes into a tea towel at the sink! "I am really sorry, Regan." He said quietly. "If I knew about it, this morning, I..."

"It looks worse than it is." She interrupted him gently, as she saw his shoulders tense. She was right, seeing her bruise would bring bad memories to the surface. "Honestly, I'm ok."

That had him turning to face her. He shook his head, "I should be comforting you, and here you are trying to help me. That is why you did not turn around to face me at lunch, when you were beside the sink? That is why you are here, eating in practically darkness, on your own!"

Regan shrugged. She opted to be honest. "I jumped to the conclusion that seeing the effect of violence might distress you and your family. You especially, given what you've been through." She got to her feet and said softly, "Sam said you never spoke about what happened to you, or your grandmother." She said gently, "And I didn't want to upset you with evidence of recent violence."

He turned away. Regan was not sure what to do, she rubbed her forehead, should she give him a hug or steer the conversation to another topic.

Sound of silence was deafening.

"They left me for dead." He whispered and she barely heard his words. Talking about that event was not something he'd shared with anyone before. He wasn't sure why he was telling Regan. But for the first time, he wanted to tell someone. Just her.