Breaking Out // Gahmi

Five

Gahyeon PoV

Before this school year I would have never thought I would have to go shopping for a party. let alone a party that I was holding.

I also never thought that my parents would actually agree on me holding one. But I guess I was wrong in many ways.

When I came home today and had told my parents that I would like to throw a party, they seemed way too excited, then normal parents should be in this kind of situation. They even offered to stay in a hotel that night, so they wouldn't bother and to order a service for cleaning up later. What odd parents indeed.

Honestly, I was kind of silently hoping that they would turn that idea down, because I was really regretting my offer in the first place. hoping they would give a solid way out of this, but alas that didn't quite work.

So now I have my whole house full of people tonight, since apparently Jiu invited the whole school. I felt really uncomfortable with having so many people, that I don't even know, over at my place. And the mental image of some random teens making out on my bed or my living room couch didn't help at all. It just made me want to back out even more. (I should probably lock my room later ... )

But as soon as I thought of Handong, I knew I had to follow through with my plan. I need her to accept me, badly. I really don't want to know what my parents would do if I don't manage to stay popular. Let alone what Handong would do to me.

So here I am, currently in the mall with Handong, Jiu and Siyeon searching for something "fancy" to wear, as they like to call it. I really didn't know what that exactly meant. Therefore I just tried to search for something that I like, but everytime I found something handong looked at me disapprovingly, so I just put it back. I tried a like four times before just giving up. God knows what that woman wants.

"Gahyeonie." she called me with a sweetness in her voice that was obviously fake. I really hate when she does that. Everytime she calls me that I could feel a shiver running down my spine. I don't know if it's the name itself or just the way she says is, but it makes me highkey uncomfortable.

I shook it off and went to look at her.

"How about this?" She was holding up a silver dress from the oversize section of the store we were in.

I just looked at her dumbfounded. Was she really thinking I need such a big size? I know I'm not as thin as her but ...

Apparently I looked like a total doofus, because Handong and Siyeon just erupted into a big laughter.

"Did you see her face?" Siyeon asked, still not being able to stop laughing.

"Hahaha, I know right." Handong replied. "Maybe you should lose some weight, Gahyeonie."

They kept whispering and even more laughing, while Jiu softly pulled on my arm and away from the others.

"Don't even listen to them." she tried to ensure me.

Did it work? Not really. Everytime Handong would tell me I should lose weight, I felt worse about my body. Knowing deep down, that I will never be able to look like she wants me to. Like she expects me to.

Tears started to form in my eyes. I'm never going to be like they want me to.

Jiu pulled me into her side, seeing me so down and I hid my face in her side.

"I feel uncomfortable in my body." I admitted hiding further into her side.

"Why though?" she asked, rubbing my back soothingly.