Forgotten Love

|23|

Not being with him was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I missed him like crazy, I barely slept nightmares often clouded my dreams. I hadn't been around the scrapyard lately afraid. Though that didn't stop bishop from sending over everyone to check on me.

Lately it was Creeper and Ez that would come keep me company, Marisol rotated on and off between me and Angel. I hadn't seen him but that didn't mean that I didn't know he was in rough shape. Pop would come by and take marisol over with him, from what I heard Angel spent many nights at his father's.

"You hungry?" Ez asked as he scanned my kitchen.

"Not to much im ok" I managed to smile.

"You barely eat Jasmine, have you all talked?" Ez sighed pulling out some eggs.

"Not in about a month, he calls i just dont know how to approach it all." I frowned.

"Has she had the baby?" I asked.

"Should be in the next couple weeks i think we never talk about it." Ez sighed.

"Oh." I frowned.

"He misses you.." Ez frowned.

"I miss him, im just not ready." I sighed.

"Hey its ok no one is rushing you ok?" Ez smiled reassuringly.

I nodded as i stared at Ez.

"Look im not choosing sides J, and i know all of this hurts but you all are hurting each other more by not being together. You both lost a baby, you almost died and angel almost lost you." Ez frowned.

I remained quiet taking in his words.

"Angel isn't perfect he fucks up shit we all do we are only human. You know i walked in on him gun on his lap just staring at it. I knew what he was thinking but I told him Marisol and you need him. You know what he said?" Ez frowned.

I was speechless I didn't know this.

"He said you were both better off without him, that he failed at being a man for you. A father to Marisol, i knocked sense into him as did Pop but that hurt me to see two people you love fall apart. You 4 are all I got besides the club and last thing i want is for all of it to fall apart. Just remember your both hurting, maybe its time you all hurt and mourned together." Ez frowned.

I was speechless at all his words, not knowing how hard he had been having it too. All of us and I was being selfish about it only thinking of myself and not the people around me. Ez was right we loved each other what was I doing here letting things slip away. I looked up at Ez and smiled as i stood up embracing him.

"Thank you E, for everything!" I said squezzing him tightly.

He held me tight as i embraced him.

"Can you get him to pops after the club stuff?" I sighed.

"Really?" Ez smiled hope all over his face.

"Really!" I smiled.

"You got it!" Ez smiled.

"Ill make dinner and we can all mend together on this" I smiled.

"That sounds perfect, now go get marisol up and you both dressed ill make breakfast before i go." Ez smiled.

"Swear she sleeps more than us!" I joked walking down the hall.

Ez chuckled as he continued with making breakfast for us.

After we all ate breakfast, Ez headed out to the scrapyard and i got mine and Marisol's things ready to go to pops. Pops agreed to bring home so steaks and id make the sides. Heading towards the Reyes house i sighed nervously. I knew i was doing the right thing we needed each other more than anything. As marisol cooed in the back i smiled, she looked so much like Angel it made my heart melt.

The next few hours I spent at the Reyes house I had an extra key. Marisol was taking her nap in her crib as time flew by and it was almost time for dinner. My sides were pretty much ready and I made a dessert too. I let myself wonder off towards the boys rooms passing Ez till I got to Angels.

I slowly opened the door, it all looked the same apart from his clothes laying on the bed. It smelt exactly like him, i scanned the room looking at all our pictures we hung up around his room. From high-school and after that all the way to us 3 after marisol was born.

"I remember you both in high school reminded me and Marisol how we were." Felipe chuckled.

I smiled at him.

"Hey pop." I smiled.

"How you feeling mija?" Felipe smiled.

"Im ok pop, happy to be home." I smiled.

"We are happy too boys should be here any minute. Want me to tell him your in here?" Felipe questioned.

"Please?" I smiled.

Felipe nodded as he walked out i sat on Angel's bed fiddling with my hands nervously. It was quiet as the sounds of motorcycle engines neared. I took a deep breath as I sat there waiting then I heard the door open.

"She is in your room" Felipe sighed.

I could hear boots coming down the hall and my eyes began to water. I slowly looked up and laid my eyes on him. His hair was a little messy and he wore his black blue and gray flannel with his kutte. I didn't know what to say or do, he looked at me with sad eyes and it hurt me.

"I need to say something's and I want you to hear me out." I paused as he nodded.

"I haven't been fair to you, I've been selfish only thinking of myself. But truth is we both are hurting by being apart and not talking. We haven't had the chance to mourn the loss of our baby, i left you alone in all this and shut you out you almost lost me. I should of took that into consideration how you felt and its wrong of me and I shouldn't of treated you that way. Regardless what happens Angel I wanna grow old together, have more kids grandkids. I know the life I signed up for I love you our family the club all that means more to me then my life." I sighed as tears fell from my eyes.

"Im so sorry baby I left you alone in this. I'm sorry!" I sobbed.

Angel wasted no time pulling me into his arms as sobs escaped, I allowed myself to crumble in his arms. As I wrapped my hands around him tightly not wanting to let go.

"Im sorry to baby I should of been a better man for you!" Angel sobbed.

I quickly took his face in my hands as I forced him to look at me.

"Your the perfect man, Perfect Father, and both our Marisol and our little Angel watching down on us are so lucky to have you!" I smiled wiping his tears. 

I put my lips to his taking him in as our lips moved together in sync. Until we couldn't breath i looked up at him.

"Home isn't home without you." I frowned.

Angel smiled down at me stroking my cheek as I kissed him again.

"Shall we go eat with our family?" Angel smiled.

I nodded as we walked hand in hand to the living room as Ez rocked marisol on his arms.

"Look My mariposa Its daddy!" Ez smiled.

"Da da da da!" Marisol cooed.

"Mi cielo!" Angel smiled grabbing her.

"When she learned that?" Angel smiled.

"We taught her, your brother help" I smiled.

Angel was lost for words as he smiled down at her.

"Lets eat?" Ez smiled.

We all nodded walking into the kitchen all of us sitting around the table. As angel placed his hand in mine giving me a squeeze. I knew that I made the right decision, I was with the only person I want to be with forever.