To Love A CEO || JJK

twenty-nine

Headline: Kim Hana Running Through Shangri-La, Jeon Jungkook Right Behind

I make a few deep bows to the driver as Mira hands him the thickest wad of cash. He huffs in annoyance before driving off. Mira asked me to arrive in a more secluded area - the alleyway right behind the restaurant.

Taehyung looks worried and I just want to bawl.

"Taehyung, thank you so much for tonight. I'll update you," Mira says sincerely. Taehyung kisses her forehead and then he's off. There's moments of silence as we watch his car disappear.

"I'm so sorry," I feel the tears coming again but Mira sits me down on the curb since we're literally in the middle of nowhere. She instantly hugs me and I feel worse.

"Jungkook wants to announce our relationship. But I just- I don't know? I choked up," I hiccup and Mira's face is twisted with pity. Her hands rubbing on my back, trying to console me. She sighs as she looks into the distance, I look right down at the ground.

"You know, he isn't Jae," Mira says. Her words aren't soft or timid - they're clear. Very clear. I gulp and swipe at my eyes and nod.

"I know," I mumbled against my sleeve, my eyes feeling like they've been wrung dry. I've never been one for alcohol but I understand why people take it to forget. A part of me is selfish enough to want to fly back to Korea and pretend Jungkook never happened - go back to the independent successful business woman. Mira's deep in thought and I laugh bitterly.

"It was all going so well till he said that," I grumble. She shoots me a dirty look.

"He doesn't know about Jae. He sincerely wanted to be a thing," she says calmly.

"What do I even do? I keep running away from him. He's too exhausted to want me anymore. I don't deserve to be wanted. What's wrong with me?" I mumble as I bury my face in my hands. The fuzz on my sleeves brush against my eyes irritatingly.

"For starters, let's go back to the hotel. We have a flight tomorrow. We could push it forward if that's what you want," Mira says.

"No, I..." I trail off.

"I want to fix this," I say uncertainly.

"Tell me why," Mira replies instantly. I look at her in confusion.

"Tell me why you want to be with him. You sound uncertain yourself," Mira says. His face and words flood my mind and it warms me from the inside out. Like butterfly wings brushing against cold skin. Like a single glance he exchanges. Like his smile.

"He makes me happy, he's funny, he's genuinely a good person. He's so passionate about what he believes in and it's incredible listening to him unpack anything like a movie. He's just so... out of my league," I grumble.

Mira elbows me. I cringe at how lovey dovey I've become.

"So what're you going to do to fix this?" she pushes.

"I need to apologise," I start and Mira nods approvingly.

"Then I'll tell him everything about Jae," I say nervously and Mira nods more.

"And I'll apologise again just in case. And I'll ask if we can pick up where we left off," I say, swallowing nervously. Mira grins and stands. She offers a hand which I accept reluctantly.

"Back to the hotel?" she nods towards me and I nod back nervously. A cold breeze blows at us and I shiver.

The car ride back is silent as I run through a silent list in my head.

But nothing sticks. I have no talking points or structured words - it's all a jumbled mess of love.