(I know they don't have their own separate dorms in the actual books or movies but just roll with it.)
The first week was something I would compare to utter hell. I constantly felt like ripping my hair out of my head, studying and catching up wasn't an easy task, and Hermione and Fred wouldn't stop bickering. I'll admit, at first I felt a little flattered with their interest in wanting to see me, but now it was just weird, and more about them making the other person angry rather than actually wanting to spend time with me. It was exhausting, and I felt used.
After my last class of the day, I slipped out quickly in order to avoid either of the two and headed to my dorm as quickly as possible. I would've honestly rather I suffered alone with my studies than have a passive aggressive interaction with either of them.
I locked the door behind me, and began getting caught up on my homework. It wasn't so bad, because for this year I was granted a bit more leisure due to having come here with only one semester left, it got me out of a lot of tests but I still had to complete the homework and convey my general understanding. Coming from studying the cycle of a plant to learning why a certain potion can make you laugh hysterically for no good reason, was a hard change for me especially because even in the human world I got mediocre grades at best.
By the time five at night rolled around, I had finished my homework just in time for dinner. I put all of my things away, in no rush to make it to the Great Hall right at five. I combed out my hair, and changed out of the comfy clothes I'd put on for studying and put on my robes, then made my way out.
I made no effort to rush myself, as I almost hoped they wouldn't save a seat for me so I could avoid the awkward dinners we'd been having for the last week. To my luck, I ran into Professor Lupin on my way.
"Headed to dinner?" He asked, we stopped for a moment but then began walking together.
I nodded. "Unfortunately."
He frowned. "Bad week? Is it your classes? You know, if you're in need of extra help, I-"
"No, it's not my classes. Well, it's not not my classes because they don't really help with the stress, but that's not the main thing." I said, cutting him off as I looked down.
"Well, what is the main thing then?" He asked.
I sighed. "It's Fred and Hermione. They keep arguing over me, but it's not even because they want to genuinely see me. It's because they want to make the other angrier, and it's just so—ugh," I complained, a slight headache growing just thinking about it. "I just feel so used, and I always feel like I'm committing a crime if I hang out with one of them individually. It feels like I'm cheating, it sounds so ridiculous." I shook my head.
He let out a pitiful laugh. "It sounds like their issue is a little more... deep rooted than they're letting on. Have you tried bringing it up?"
"Yes, once to each of them but they acted like it wasn't even happening and I don't know... it made me feel crazy even though they say the most unkind things about each other to me. So, just today I started heading straight to my dorm after classes."
"Well, if there's any more altercations during dinner tonight, call them out on it. If you catch them bickering about you, then tell them that's what you've been talking about," he said, both of us stopping in front of the dining hall. "You can do this."
I nodded, giving him a small thanks as I entered the loud dining hall. I scanned for a seat in the Gryffindor section, and sure enough they'd saved one for me, right in between Fred and Hermione. I quickly scanned any other section of the table, and noticed there was a free spot in between Ron and Neville, directly across from the empty seat they'd saved me. Thanking God himself, I took that seat.
"Hey Neville," I said, and he looked up at me, a kind smile pulled at his lips. "Mind if I sit?"
He shook his head. "Not at all." He even scooted over more, giving me even more room to sit.
"Thanks," I said, slowly looking up to meet Fred and Hermione's intense stares.
They immediately slammed into each other, fighting for the spot directly across from me, but eventually gave in and shared it.
"Lola, where'd you go after Potions? I looked everywhere for you." Fred forced, trying to not look annoyed in the company of Hermione.
"Yeah, I thought we had plans to study after class today?" She said, trying to overrule what Fred had previously said, earning a glare from him.
"I went to my dorm to study." I said lowly, slowly beginning to eat my food.
"Well how come? I couldn't helped you." She said.
"Or I could've." Fred scoffed.
"How could you help her? You're awful in school, Fred. Worst grades I've ever seen, besides, don't you have quidditch after class?"
"I still would've made time for her."
"Well, maybe you should focus on the things you're good at, Fred."
"Oh, like what? Knowing how to manage my time so that I can go to practice and see my girlfriend?"
Hermione scoffed. "Yeah? How's that working out for you?"
I looked down, my breathing increasing, verging a panic attack as my vision slowly became blurred with the tears brimming in my eyes. I looked over at Ron for moral support, who was looking at Hermione and Fred in disbelief, and then back at me as they argued.
I pursed my lips, and finally let go. "Will you guys please shut up! Do you really not see how crazy you're acting?! This thing you guys have going on is so much more than just wanting to hang out with me, it's an endless cycle of who can make the other angrier, and honestly, it's exhausting. I've been feeling beyond used and frustrated this last week because of you two, so you guys can either figure your shit out, or leave me alone until you do." I cried, trying to sound as calm as I could through the tears that had managed to spill out. I then stood from my spot, and left the table.
I wasn't sure where I was going, but I just knew I needed to be away from everything and everyone. I headed towards the covered bridge, taking in the breathtaking view as I thought everything through.
Part of me knew they would work it out, but the other part of me convinced myself that they wouldn't think it was worth it. The self-doubt made my breathing uneasy, and I leaned on the rail for support. I kept walking eventually, and made my way down to the edge of the lake Professor Lupin had showed me the first day I arrived here.
I sat on the grass, hugging my knees into my chest and looked out onto the water, trying to collect my thoughts once again. I heard footsteps coming near me after a few minutes, mentally crossing my fingers that it wasn't either of them.
"Miss Lockins?" I heard a familiar voice say.
I turned around, and sure enough it was Professor Lupin again. I smiled sadly upon making eye contact. "We've got to stop meeting while I'm in these moods." I joked, wiping my tears off of my face.
He sat down beside me and gazed out onto the water. "Ron told me everything, he asked me to look for you, I figured you'd be here," he said. "He said the two of them immediately started arguing after you left, you know, blaming the other and all. But he also said that he and Harry told them they'd best get their act together, or they'd both lose you. I think it'll get through to them." He reassured.
"I just wish I understood why they had so much tension. I haven't gone one day this week where I didn't feel completely alone, even if I was accompanied by one of them. It's just—I'm sorry. This is so pathetic." I finished, wiping my tears away with the sleeve of my robe.
"Not even in the slightest. You're in a brand new environment, already swamped with homework that I'm sure makes little to no sense, and now you're dealing with this. I think I would be very upset too."
I felt a sense of calm in his words, a sense of acknowledgement, as if he really understood and was offering a piece of personal advice. We sat for the rest of dinner out by the water, and then he walked me to my dorm where we bid our goodbyes for the evening.
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Soulmate; Fred Weasley AU
FanfictionLife's not really a walk in the park after finding out your soulmate isn't exactly human.