Meant to be (Draco x reader)

Chapter 30: broken pt1

"Good night love"

"Good night draco" you two fall asleep cuddling each other. 'This is so perfect' you thought to yourself as you drift off to sleep
-

You wake up to something moving. You shoot you looking around and see Draco's body. He's flinching, sweat dripping on his face as he moves, whimpering words.

"No! Please!" He pauses you grab his hand with yours and try to wake him up, shaking him softly.
"Stop! I'm sorry" he whimpers as he flinched more.

"Draco, wake up" you whisper to him he relaxes a little but starts flinching again soon after. He lets out another whimper and your heart breaks.
"Draco baby please wake up" you squeeze his hand and bring your other hand to his face, caressing his cheek. He opens his eyes and looks at you. You can see his blood shot eyes and he looks away from you. You bring your hand to his chin making him look at you. He looks at you, his normally grey beautiful eyes are stained red and look broken. You pull him into a hug as he does the same, he tucks his head in the crook of your neck, sobbing softly. You rub his back and whisper sweet nothings into his ear, he wraps his arms around you, holding you tight as he tries to suppress his whimpers. You stay like that for a long time, you think he's asleep until he sniffles again and slowly pulls away. He's sitting up so you sit up as well, hoping he'll talk to you about this like you did him.

"What can I do to help?" You ask calmly. He looks at you blankly,

"Nothing" he says coldly.

"Okay... do you want to talk about it?" You ask making sure your tones calm

"No, stop talking about it" he tries to lay back down but you put your hand on his hand. He stops and looks at you, your eyes are tearing up slightly

"Please don't shut me out" his eyes turn back soft, the ones you've learned to love. You stay like that for a couple seconds until they turn hard again, cold, unable to love.

"I'm can't shut you out if I never let you in" he says harshly,

"Draco i-" he cuts you off

"Jeez y/n can you just drop it?! God you're so annoying" you need to get out of there before you punch him.

"Okay... whatever" you get up and put on some sweats and a hoodie. He turns to look at you

"Where are you going?" He questions

"I'm not going to stay here if you're going to just be a dick to me, I want to help you. Why won't you just let me?" He doesn't say anything so you head to the door

"Where are you going" he more demands this time, his voice a low growl.

"Out" you say and you leave him there, in your bed. You start to walk towards the astronomy tower, it's the only place you feel safe, home almost. You go there and just think for hours.

Your thoughts

Why can't he just let me in?
What did I do wrong?
What happened in his dream?
Should I go back?
No... if I go back he'll think I'm weak and he'll push me around.
I'm not going to allow him to push me around like that.
Is he just using me?
Like he did every other girl?
Holy shit am I no different than Pansy?
I refuse to be a Pansy!
What the fuck have I gotten myself into...

End thoughts

The sun is starting to rise so you decide to head back, still confused and have no idea what to do about this situation. You're walking back to your dorm, when you get there you take a breath and slowly twist the door knob. You walk in and Draco's pacing along the floor, you except an apology or something but he says,

"What the fuck! Where the hell were you!" He stands facing you, he runs his hands through his hair.

"I told you I was out, I needed to think" you walk to your dresser and start grabbing your uniform for today. He storms over to you and grabs you hand

"I said, where the fuck were you" you look into his eyes and there's nothing soft about them. Where did the Draco I like go? You pull your hands out of his grasp and look up at him

"I went to the astronomy tower" you turn your attention back to the dresser, picking out your clothes.

"Why were you there" you don't answer him, he's starting to get really mad and you don't want anything to happen. You just want to be alone and think, about everything. He steps closer to you and turns you by your hips so you're looking at him. His hands stay on your hips as he says,
"Answer me" you shake your head and look away
"GOD DAMN IT Y/N" he screams causing you to jump, he looks at you. You take a shaky breath, he raises his hands to your face. You flinch, expecting him to smack you. But when he doesn't you open your eyes and look at him.

'He was just running his hands through his hair. He does that when he's stressed' you think, calming yourself down. He looks at you and suddenly the atmosphere in the room changed.

"You... thought I was going to hit you?" He ask softly, you shake your head but he continues
"You're scared of me?" He brings his eyes to yours and a tear falls from his face.

"No.." you say but your shaky voice gives it away.
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to-" he takes a step back

"It's not your fault." He says softly looking at the floor. You take a step towards him and he looks up at you

"I'm not scared of you I promise.. it's just a reaction, it means nothing" you say trying to calm him down. He's nods his head, agreeing. But his eyes say a different story. You hug him, wrapping your arms around his waist and he hesitates but puts his hands around you.

"I'm sorry..." he mutters so quietly you could barely hear it. You pull away from the hug and look up at him. You stand on your tiptoes and kiss his cheek.

"It's not your fault" he finally brings his eyes off the floor, looking into yours. He looks so broken, I just wanted to know if he was okay and what he was dreaming about..

-

Sorry this episode was more of toxic Draco lol

Also thank you all for the sweet comments about my book and my 'friends'. I low key think if they weren't in front of other people they wouldn't of reacted like that... Idek it just doesn't feel weird to me when I talk to other people who read hp fanfics. But i guess to other people it is a little weird lol idk