only angel ✭ h.s.

Eighteen

"Are you ready to go?" Jolene's kind voice breaking me from the battle going on inside of my mind.

It has been five days since I've seen her. Five days of denial, sadness, and anger. The first two days I was in denial that she actually told me she didn't need me.

On the third and fourth day, I was in a whirlwind of emotions, trying to figure out what I had done wrong and what I could've done differently.

Now that brings me to today and how angry I am that she would push me away like that when all I ever do is help her. I understand that she was hurting, no one should ever endure such pain especially from someone who is supposed to love them but that gives her no right to hurt someone who only wants to see her happy.

I tried not to be angry, I did my best to give her the benefit of the doubt. I thought she'd call me or at least have Jolene and Liam talk to me, but no.

Radio silence.

All I ever hear from Jo is how Angela's been out every night and either come home early in the morning or not at all.

I don't know where she goes or who she's been with and it's getting on my nerves. We're in a relationship, we are supposed to work through things together not throw in the towel when things get hard.

I'm honestly confused about what we are anymore. She's made no effort to get us back to where we were and I don't think she would unless I made the first move.

I sat in front of her door that night crying and waiting for hours. I don't cry but the way she blatantly threw it in my face that I couldn't help her and she didn't need me hurt, really fucking bad.

Why couldn't she just see that I cared about her?

After I fell asleep at her door I wasn't woken up till Jolene arrived in the morning with Liam, he suspected I slept over after I didn't call or come back to the car.

Far fucking from it. Even though I had fallen asleep it felt like I hadn't slept for a week. I was exhausted. My mind never stopping thinking about how Angela was feeling or if she was okay.

Liam had to peel me off the floor because of how tired I was. I didn't sleep for a few days, my head wasn't a safe place and I never stopped overthinking.

Once I finally hit the sadness stage in the process I slept for thirteen hours and it was bliss. I finally had the quiet I was longing for.

I also hadn't left the apartment since I arrived, only ever leaving for my classes, and even then I only made it twice this week.

I really needed to see Angela, we needed to talk, this couldn't go on forever. So that's exactly what my plan is, to talk. She had told Jo she was going to a party at Nialls tonight and to not wait up for her.

Jo so kindly relayed the information to me knowing I needed to see her. She's pretty much been our mediator in this situation.

"Yeah, let's go." I nodded towards Jo following her out to Liam's car. The entire car ride my anxiety was through the roof, I had no idea what would happen or how it would go down.