I never hated you (Draco Malfoy)

Fail

Draco

I saw you getting stripped to the floor in tarnishing pain, yet I still remained put, after all this time, this is the outcome, this is where we all stay, I saw your gaze whilst you lay on the floor-that wasn't who I met back in first year, no it indeed was not, all too much has changed since then, couldn't tell if it was for the best or the worst. When our eyes pierced right through one another that wasn't a heartfelt moment-no it was fear.

I saw your eyes grow wet, and my body did nothing but make its way towards you-that wasn't supposed to happen I would never do that back then, but the thing was we aren't back then, we both lie here now, both with most likely doomed fates, yet mine was already set, it was already predicted, I've always been set to fail.

How did we get here--thats it, thats what constantly replayed in my head, like a never ending spiral, how the hell did we get where the fuck we are now, I was meant to hate you--that was the whole point, that was our thing. I said I hated you--I called you a half blood bitch and you fired back every time, but at one point I stopped, and along with that you did too.

We both stand here now and I could see the fear in your eyes grow day by day--I want nothing more than to lock my eyes with yours and tell you my truth when I come in your presence--the way you made everything ever more bearable just from the mere comfort of your being.

You once said you would stay by my side through it all.

That was one of your biggest mistakes.

And I too would choose you a million times again-- I would always come back for you.

No matter the circumstance.

I always would.

Thats what lied beneath my repulse towards you--the fact that you were utterly addicting.

Look where that need for one another got us, nothing good of the sort, I truly used to nauseate at your glance-- every time, every second of every day I would see you in that bloody school, sitting in those fucking seats and I was consumed with disgust. Yet here I am, watching you crumble onto the cold floor, whilst I have to be yanked back for my own sake, but at some point I stopped caring about my own sake--and all my mind wandered to was you--merlin you never seemed to leave--even when I was putrified by your gaze, somehow you were still consuming my mind.

Back then I had no clue of who you were, I heard the word half blood and nauseated at the thought, but only now I realize its my blood--my kind who lie the filthiest. Now-- look at my state, now I know every little minuscule detail of your being and I'm fucking It all up just by being near your presence--because for some absurd reason the two of us are fools--we know the others worth--the others true self and we're utter opposites--yet here we both are.

I begged you--everyone fucking begged you to stay away--that I am merely a lost cause, but for some reason you never seemed to listen, that was by far your worst trait--and trust me you didn't have many of those. I quite literally lost my mind over you, your entire being was addicting--you as a whole we're mesmerizing--I could go on and on about your fucking eyes-- your words--merlins sake the way you sit is fucking perfect--but I couldn't put it into words If I tried because your presence--your entire being is what did it for me.

It may seem selfish to say--but you put me through more pain than one ever has--why because you just couldn't do yourself a favor--you saw the messed up madness I carried--whether it was the mark--merlins sake my name within itself is enough common sense--but it wasn't for you. If someone saw my arm the way you did--they would do the smartest thing and turn the fuck away, but you--you did what a fool would do, you did what I thought anyone was incapable of doing--you stayed --so help me you will not stay forever--not If I have a say in it--but in that moment I pulled up my sleeve and showed the gruesome work that had been done--you stayed--then you quickly saw the pathetic work I had done--and yet there you were.