cigarette smoke.

SALT-RIDDEN stardom

i've got downy feathers in my hair and fire on my tongue, drink you up like catharsis in its final form to watch you turn to cinders & become anew― you tell me the man of rage fire rage heat burning is a monster like you. that if you're so bad why doesn't he have a noose tied round his neck too?

babe i don't really know is the thing. i don't, 'cuz they tell me what to do & you know that i follow orders (good little solder boy, wings of ash and sulfur) like they're gospel. and to me they are― do you think that you listened to orders like that once, that you've licked your skin and preened yourself until you're perfect. until the man the monster that made you smiles with some warped version of pride; that thing your just so desperate to taste on your tongue. over your teeth, right? oh boy of blue eyes and candle wax flesh scented lavender and ivory. and kami, babe, we're so sad & lonely. dipped in melancholy and some mockery of fear. like you've seen the real monsters that only people like me have. maybe you are like me― born and breed for someone else, not human. babe, darlin', love of my life, boy of too hot tears & too sharp teeth, hold me in your melting hands. boy of molten tears, unable to cry just as i.

you've got conviction in your eyes and nothing will stop you, i fear death itself won't be enough; i fear you'll turn to decay and stardust. that the devil will hold you by the throat and all you'll do is laugh, because all your life you've been told that you're unworthy, defective, failure. so you'll laugh at the devil in the face, because bile bides on your tongue like a reminder; ashes and smoke and anything that's long dead souls your teeth― i'd know best, what that tastes like.

you, love, are beyond redemption. it's not like you care, but you'll never read these anyway. nobody will, not even me; the paperback threads in my mind will erase any notion of its existence. and darling when we kiss it tastes like cheep liquor and home; smells like ashes and hell; feels like molten lead and charred wood after a rainstorm; looks like a pair of overpriced jeans with oatches sewn in; sound like cawing over a forest fire. you only leave ashes in your wake, only sorrow and faves unable to cry; but i've never been able. maybe that's why we're meant to be. or maybe i'm looking too far into this, digging up secrets of a boy with your eyes and a joyless face. you've always been one to cover your bases, huh? you.. you always keep going―

―maybe it's 'cuz you were never taught how. neither of us were, it's tragic, maybe. our timelines'll come CRASHIN' DOWN boy blue. we're made of the stardust of some supernovas great show. boy of wax wings and feathered skies (that's me, babe)and boy of blueberry eyes and gunmetal skin. you're a maverick in the best ways. you know what i'm like, picking things apart until they become undone.

maybe it's because that's all i've been taught―or it's a skill passed from thief to thief in my viens.

ichor swims cold under my skin; i can't describe myself as human with bloodstained wings taped to my back, sewn in like your messed patchwork of starburnt skin and scarred smile with too many teeth. you & i are borne of different womb from the same covenants― (   sometimes i wonder if you realize our skin is melded together in fates strings   ). they called me gods boy and you the devil's son, maybe that's why we both fell to earth: ethereal sights hold no meaning to blind eyes & all that.

you said that you want to be buried in ash & snow by your mother's grave. if she was to die, you'd like to lie next to her in death (we know it won't happen but you've always been a dreamer). sleep is for people who are safe; we've been on the run for ages. flaked skin crumpled to magneta-blue and bruises dyed lavender. (we're restless, you and i).

burn your bridges in ice. babe when we fall it'll be to salt-ridden stardom.