Company Of Angels || Adam Park

twenty six

I felt like I had no control over my body as I tried to twist the door handle open. My arms felt like jelly as I really began to panic even worse than I already was. I tried to scream out for someone to help me, but the words were caught in my throat and I could barely get them out.

I managed to grip my fingers around the door handle and twist the hand, flinging the door back open as I managed to barley spit out someone's name above a whisper.

"Adam." I cried as I stumbled out the door, hoping to get his attention. He was the first person who crossed my mind – he was who was I wanted right now. I went to run out of the room to find him, remembering that he had been in the living room last, but as I started to run out... I slammed right into him. He had already been standing right outside of the door, probably waiting for this very moment.

I felt his arms wrap around me and he held me as tightly as he could while I was still having this mental breakdown. I buried my face into his chest as I just let all the sobs come out. I don't even know which I was panicking over more now... The fact that my grandmother was released on bail... or the face that I just scared the living daylight right out of myself by closing the bedroom door unintentionally.

I could hardly focus on anything other than all of this. I couldn't calm myself down and that was only making me freak out even more. I was still trying to gasp for air and I think I did pass out again while Adam was holding me – I couldn't really tell. I know one moment he was holding me tightly against him and then the next second he was being gentler as I felt him moving. He had brought us back into my room, probably for privacy. I reached up and wrapped my arms around his shoulders while I continued crying.

I felt so sick to my stomach right now and I could hardly even think...

Adam reached up with one of his hands and stroked the back of my head in soft and soothing motions. His other arm stayed wrapped around my back as he slowly moved us towards my bed.

"Danielle, I know you are scared right now – but we need to get you calmed down." Adam whispered in my ear.

"I can't do this." I cried back.

"You can – you are so much braver than you feel right now." He whispered back.

"How could they do this...?" my voice broke as I slumped further into his arms.

"I don't know... I don't know Danielle." He hugged me, "But I promise you – we all promise you that she is not going to go anywhere near you."

"I'm sorry..." I cried.

"Danielle, look at me... please. Please look at me." We were standing at the edge of my bed now.

Adam pulled me back some so that he could force me to look at him because he knew I couldn't do it myself right now. That's when I realized he was crying too and that's when I realized that he was scared... I had scared him. I scared Adam with the way I was acting and that broke my heart. It only made me feel like a terrible person when I realized that he was hurting seeing me this way.

"I'm sorry..." was all I could say to him.

"Danielle Ann Hale – she is never going to hurt you again. I swear to you that." Adam looked me right in my eyes through his own tears.

"I'm scaring you." I choked out.

"Yeah, you are..." Adam admitted, "Only because I don't know how to convince you that nothing is going to happen to you. I understand why you're scared, and I just want to take all this fear away from you."

"I'm sorry Adam – I'm sorry. You shouldn't have to deal with me like this." I shook my head as I put my hands on his chest, remembering that I had shoved him, "I pushed you... Adam, I pushed you."