A ROYAL SURPRISE

🎀Chapter 32🎀

"Do your best and leave the rest to God"

- Ariel Sam.

*~*~*

Life is like a storm. Each and everyday you have to fight to move forward. Nothing is certain, every good thing in your life that you're planning to keep, you have to secure. Anything can happen at anytime and in just a snap of a finger, you can be at rock bottom. Where is so hard to put yourself together and get back on track, because right in front of you is everything you invested your hard work into that produced- nothing.
And that's the most painful part, the part that can drive you crazy.

Some people get problems, get into serious life issues, and they don't know who to turn to, or what to do.

Fortunately for me, as a child, I was trained and raised that there is only one person who I can go to in every situation I find myself, be it good or bad- God.

I've learnt to always go to God everytime I have a problem. So I push open the church doors, and gaze down the empty rows of seats, and walk slowly and tiredly to the altar, and drop to my knees in tears and distress.

I'm sick and tired of being tired. I'm tired of being hopeless. I'm tired of feeling as though my life has come to an end. As if my world is tumbling down. I'm tired of having to put on a facade, and pretend that everything is alright. I'm so tired.
Even when I sleep, I won't have rest. Whether I sleep for a whole 24 hours or 48 or 72, I'll still wake up feeling tired because it is not my body that needs rest. It is my soul. My soul is tired.
I've been through so much. And I believe I have tried. I have tried my best to look into the mirror every morning without breaking something.

I've gone three months, three good months, waking up and inspecting the growth of this baby. Watching how my stomach swells and grows into a bump that is carrying a child I wasn't in favour of during it's conceive. I've bought baby food, baby clothes, diapers. I try as much as possible to use my salary each month to buy stuff for the baby so that I wouldn't have to struggle so much when it arrives. Truthfully the only thing I haven't done is go for a scan, because I'm still scared to physically see the child that is in my womb that I'm growing to love each day.

I have tried.

But I am tired.

Mateo's touch on my skin never even went past my neck. The only man that I have ever had any form of intimacy with is Ale. He's the only man that I have allowed to touch me and I have willingly slept with.

Did I make any mistake in my past life? Why exactly am I being punished this way and what exactly am I being punished for? I'm not perfect, that one I know much well. But I don't hurt others because I know I want people to treat me well, like I deserve, therefore I do same to them. I give to those who do not have even though I am not rich. I share the little I have with those who don't. I extend a helping hand when I can. I do what I have to do as a child of God, as a friend, as a sister, as a daughter, as a human being who God created, as a neighbour who should love the other as themselves. I am human and I have my flaws, but I never forget or try to convince myself to do otherwise than what is right.

So what exactly am I being punished for?

"God I want to know" I sob "Is it something I have done wrong? Is it somebody I hurt that I don't know and karma has finally decided to take its turn on me? Have I wronged anyone in any way? Have I committed any sin which can never be forgiven and made me unworthy in your sight? Have I forgotten to seek forgiveness? I JUST WANT TO KNOW!" I yell, my voice bouncing off the walls of the empty church "The days are getting closer for that court hearing and this is the result I receive. If nothing is done, they might take my baby from me when it's born, and give Mateo the chance to have access to my baby when he has no right. I know I didn't want this baby from the start, but that doesn't mean anyone has the right to take it away from me. Or is this my punishment for not wanting this baby from the start? Did I not have a right to be angry? To lash out? DID I NOT? God don't let them do this to me, I beg of you. I have no one else to look to. Please"

🎀🌻🎀

I enter my apartment and see Ale sitting in the sofa that faces the T.V. in the living room.

"Where's Kendra?" I ask, placing my bag on the counter.

"She's gone to get a few things. She says you both are running out of groceries" he says and I nod, taking off my shoes in the process.

"I saw that same guy who kissed you drop you home yesterday" he says and I sigh, taking a seat myself in another sofa and closing my eyes.

I know I should have told him and all but I am not in the mood for this today.

"His mother invited me over to dinner, I couldn't decline for it would break the poor woman's heart"

He licks his lips before replying, "Eufy we are in a relationship"

"So? I can't take dinner invitations?"

"Don't get me wrong" he sighs, looking directly at me "All I'm trying to say is that I expect you to be honest with me. I don't like that guy around you and then you had to go to dinner with him, without telling me anything"

I take in a deep breath, trying to control and keep at bay the temper that's beginning to boil up within me, "I didn't go to dinner with him. Don't misinterpret my words. I said that his mother invited me for dinner and I couldn't break the poor woman's heart. Besides I told Gerald that we are in a relationship. So please, let's end of here"

"We can't talk about issues in our relationship"

"Ale please." I plead, wanting to end this talk already.

"Eufy I am not understanding you"

"Ale this is barely an issue! Okay?!" I snap, finally losing it "I just explained to you what happened, I told you that Gerald is off my back because he knows I'm in a relationship. What else do you want to hear? I am tired Ale, and I am so not ready for this!" I shout "I just found out yesterday that Ma-fucking-teo is the father of my child depending on the test that was conducted when that bastard didn't even go past my skirt. I can't seem to understand if he paid someone off or not, I don't know what the damn hell is going on. So the last thing I need right now is your jealousy. I am not dealing with it."

Ale gets up from his seat and pulls me I to a hug, "Eufy I'm so sorry"

I pull away from his arms, "I guess you would like to hear the hard truth that sorry always doesn't always solve shit. I have only three days to the court case to figure out something to do before the court takes my child away or give Parternity to that irresponsible idiot because of some stupid and fake DNA results"

"Eufy please calm down. There's always a way to solve issues"

"How the hell do you expect me to calm down?" I stare at him as if he's mad "You know what? Please leave. I want to be alone"

"Eufy-

"The door" I cut him off "See you later" I say and take my bag and shoes, slamming my bedroom shut behind me.

Oh God help me before I lose my sanity.