(3rd person)
Finn felt dumb. He was getting in a state...right in front of Noah. He didn't want Noah seeing him like this but all this was too much for Finn, he already felt so so guilty but seeing Noah with another guy, seeing Noah happy with someone else hurt and it was all too much but it was his fault.
Noah on the other hand was worried about Finn; he shouldn't be, they weren't together anymore but he had known Finn for years, he's loved Finn even before they were even together, that kind of love and care doesn't just disappear. Finn was now sat on the floor in front of Noah still shaking but his breathing was now steady.
"Finn, how long have you been having your panic attacks? I thought you stopped?" He questioned.
"I- I don't know..." Finn whispered feeling embarrassed. Truth is ever since Noah left Finn started having his panic attacks again but they stopped after a while but seeing Noah brought it all back. He was...different. He seemed more mature, and in a way, more free and that hurt Finn. Was he always holding Noah back? Maybe Finn had always been the problem and deep down Finn knew Noah deserved better but actually seeing Noah with better hurt.
"Come on, drink some water," Noah whispered softy handing him a glass. Noah had to stop himself sitting next to Finn, he knew once he sat down he wouldn't be able to leave his side. But he felt bad. He blamed himself for this. He wanted to hug Finn as tightly as he could and just tell him everything is okay; but it wasn't okay. Noah missed Finn everyday and seeing Finn again only made the feelings come back and being there with Jack only felt like he was cheating but Finn was the one that cheated on him. Noah knew he should just get up and tell someone else to go check on Finn but he couldn't just leave without knowing the truth.
"Finn...?" Noah asked once Finn had finally stopped shaking. Finn looked up waiting for Noah to continue.
"How long?" Finn slightly tilted his head confused at what Noah meant but then he realized. Noah assumed it was just the once, Finn said it was just the once however he had to make sure but Finn remained silent. Noah's stomach began to churn. No...
"Finn-" Noah almost pleaded as his voice cracked. Finn was staring down at the floor, he couldn't look Noah in the eyes. Noah could feel what was coming but he just didn't, he couldn't believe it.
"Once before." Finn mumbled finally, refusing to look up at Noah. Noah's face fell, he took a step back suddenly feeling sick.
"Did- did you not love me?" Noah said while biting his lip trying to hold the tears back.
"No, no, no!! I did- I still love you!" Finn attempted to reassure Noah finally making eye contact but Noah started shaking his head. How could Finn say that. He couldn't love him.
"Then why?" Noah breathed and let his tears fall making Finn feel 10x worse. Finn opened his mouth about to talk but Noah immediately cut him off.
"Actually I don't think I wanna know." Noah wiped his eyes harshly took a deep breath and grabbed a new glass and filling it before joining the others, but this time he didn't go to Jack; he couldn't, he would know something was up so instead he put on a smile and sat with Winona and David. They made small talk catching up but out of the corner of Noah's eye he watched as Finn walked out. Finn's eyes were red and puffy and he whispered something to Sadie.
"Are you sure?" Sadie replied fairly loudly honestly confused but then it hit her. Sadie and Noah made eye contact and Sadie looked back over to Finn.
"Did something happen?" Sadie asked genuinely concerned because Finn looked...awful. Finn just shook his head.
"I just need to go Sadie, I'm sorry the party has been great." Finn forced a smile.
"Yeah thank you for coming um I'll message you..." Sadie whispered not knowing what to do. Finn wanted to laugh, Sadie hadn't spoken to him in 6 months, she's not going to start now. All Finn could do was mumble a 'yeah' and headed back through the house and out the front door without even saying goodbye to anyone. Finn didn't think anyone would care though, no-one would even notice if he was gone. He fucked up and he deserved this.
Noah watched the whole thing. He watched Finn leave and he felt sad but relieved. He was so confused. He knew that was the last time he was ever going to see Finn again and that made him sad but Finn ruined their relationship, Noah should be happy he's gone but he just wasn't. Noah snapped back into reality and smiled at David and Winona and attempted to carry on the conversation that he zoned out in.
Noah finally excused himself and began to walk off. He didn't know where to go or what to do, he just needed to be alone.
"Has something happened?" He heard someone ask softly in their British accent. Noah wanted to turn around and hug his former best friend but what Finn said was spinning around inside his head. 'Once before.' Noah suddenly felt a burst of anger rising through his body.
"Yeah, I was dumb enough to forgive you." Noah snapped before pushing past Millie and heading inside towards the bathroom. Jack stood up immediately following his boyfriend confused.
A/N: How was this?
How was the third person pov?
Should I do a flashback of what happened with Finn and Millie?
Any suggestions comment!
Also I'm not sure if I've mentioned but this is inspired by @loubleuu larry story, so go check that out!!
Don't forget to vote!!
~
Zoe :))
