entry twenty-one

78 14 0
                                    

after you found out what my mother did to me, you called someone that i didn't know who and dragged me towards the hospital forcefully even though i don't want to

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

after you found out what my mother did to me, you called someone that i didn't know who and dragged me towards the hospital forcefully even though i don't want to.

all along the way you keep on ranting about ignoring everyone messages and calls or this and that until i couldn't catch up what was the things you said anymore as i felt so embarrassed that you found out about what was happening inside my house that i kept for myself from the others.

as i stayed silent, you keep on checking on me sending glances towards my direction in the corner of your eyes not letting go from my hand even just for a second.  i don't really know what to said or what to do at that time, i was afraid of what would you be thinking of me.

a loser?

a pitiful human being?

nothing good came to my mind as we walked downtown quietly, letting the sun that started to setting down engulfing our figures perfectly as the sky turned into the beautiful mix colors of orange,  red and any other insignificant colors that match with each other as it felt getting more colder as the time passed by.

such a beautiful sky  for a bad day.

how pathetic.

as we arrived at the hospital, the doctor immediately checked my condition that was just having a slight cut on my cheek from the shreds mom threw at me earlier and clean the remaining little pieces of it away from my skin.

it didn't sting even just a little bit since i was getting used to this kind of treatment from both my mom and the bullies, this is not the worst.

when we're free to leave, we sat down not knowing what to said at each other before you broke the silence calling my name softly which made my heart thumping faster like whenever i'm around you and fills my stomach with butterflies that felt like flying everywhere.

a sudden memories rising back into my mind, making me forced myself to just forget about the feelings i had for you.

never ending thoughts were swirling inside my mind as i failed to noticed that you reach for my hand, rolling up my long thick coat sleeves, eyes widening slightly.

when the cold air slowly grazing my hand, then i just realized you found out another of my secret that i keep from the others, pulling my hand away from your reach as i rolled down the sleeves to covered it once again, letting out a small forced smile.

"it's okay, i'm fine"

what i didn't expected after saying those words that you were crying in front of me as i felt my heart break into pieces when i saw tears started to running down into your cheeks as you reach for my hand once again.

"sorry, i'm very sorry"

why did you apologize? this isn't your fault.

"i should notice it sooner, i'm deeply sorry for not noticing it"

why is it? i just wanted to cry along with you.

and i actually do when i felt your soft warm lips colliding into the knuckles of my hand kissing it gently.

i feel so precious by those actions, like i'm the most important in your life.

but... bam?

"sorry, i think you should stop acting like this towards me. bam wouldn't like it right? "

it's clear that you were confused by my words as i pulled my hand away from you even though i didn't want to let go.

a flash of realization seems to appearing in your beautiful pair of [e/c] eyes right after before i could say anything more.

"ah, you saw us that time? i did feel bad for rejecting him but i don't see him more than a little brother"

i should apologize to you sincerely bam, since i was so happy at that time when she said those words.

dedicated for you || khun.a.aWhere stories live. Discover now