Without You || todobaku

11

BAKUGOU'S POV

I found myself in Kirishima's front yard. We drank water and ate sandwiches. I was soaked in sweat. He was right about my clothing choice and running, but no way in hell would I admit it. He finished his sandwich in two bites which was kind of impressive.
"Let me go clean my room a little bit and we can play video games" he stood up.
"You know I don't give a shit Kirishima, you don't need to clean."
"Oh," He put on an exaggerated serious face, "I'm gonna need to clean."
He laughed and ran up to the door and disappeared inside. I couldn't finish my sandwich. I left the rest on the plate and drank my water. I felt my phone vibrating which took a second to squeeze out of my tight and sweaty jean pocket. I finally freed it, saw Todoroki was calling, and answered.
"Bakugou," He didn't even let me say hello, he sounded nervous or something. His breathing was different like he was walking or pacing.
"What's up Icyhot?" I wiped my forehead with my sleeve.
"I… we need to keep the two of us under wraps. N-Not that I'm not happy to be with you, I am. It's just… There are people that won't understand and probably cause a lot of issues."
"No one's gonna fuck with us Icyhot, I'll blow their heads off."
"Please, Bakugou, please don't tell people. It's… *sigh* one of them is my father."
I froze, then frowned, "That asshole cares about who you're dating?"
"He cares about who I'm using my free time with and associating myself with. Not to mention I don't want to find out his opinion on being gay."
"Yeah well you aren't gay, and I'm not gay."
He paused for longer than expected, "Please tell me you're joking. We're definitely gay, Bakugou."
I squeezed my phone, "I-I'm not gay, you're just-"
"Just what? Be careful what you say next, Bakugou or my feelings will be compromised."
"Woah, what the fuck? Drop the attitude okay? We can talk about this when we're not on the phone."
"*sigh* I'll see you Monday."
He hung up. I slammed my phone into the grass and put my head in my hands. Trying to figure out how to do this whole feelings thing was really difficult. I was either pleasing someone or just pissing them off. I never have a happy medium. I don't consider myself gay, like at all. Todoroki is the only guy I've ever thought about in that sense. I don't think just one guy makes me gay. Right?
I stood up and grabbed my trash, shoving my phone back in my pocket. I turned and walked into Kirishima's home. He was blasting the most punk garage band music in his room. I opened the door and found him with a bandana folded across his forehead, no shirt, and some very loose shorts that were holding on for dear life around his hips. I instantly felt like someone was choking me.
He turned and looked at me in the middle of an air guitar solo and immediately stopped. He laughed in embarrassment and turned it down a bit.
"I got most of the trash thrown away, we at least have enough space to walk and sit or whatever," He said, "Oh also, let me give you some clothes you look like you're dying in those jeans."
I glanced down and then to him, "Yeah okay."
He dug in his drawers and yanked out a pair of MY FUCKING SHORTS and some random black quarter sleeve shirt. I thanked him and proceeded to get changed. I didn't think much of it till I had a quick glance to the redhead that I saw him staring. I hurried into the clothes and pretended I didn't see that. 
We sat down side by side in front of his tv, he handed me a controller, and we started to play. It was a first-person shooter, one of my favorites. He knew that. I took the game too seriously sometimes, I just didn't want to lose. Due to my immersion in the game I didn't notice Kirishima's knee touching mine, or the fact he moved closer to me at all.

TODOROKI'S POV

Monday. 
I walked to school.
I was in the shittiest mood. 
I felt a bit guilty just ignoring my friends as they greeted me out front but I couldn't put up with anything. What I needed was a good night's rest and a break from everything. Well everything except my boyfriend. My "not gay" boyfriend. 
Something about what he said over the phone didn't sit right with me. I didn't know if it was just me and my sensitive self or if he really thought he wasn't gay. I knew I was gay, I've come to terms with it. Granted, Bakugou was the first boy that actually opened my eyes about who I was. It didn't matter, I just knew this is who I am and what I preferred. 
I kind of ignored Bakugou since the call, which probably wasn't very smart knowing how he can be. I didn't want to anger him or depress him but really, how can he be so ignorant sometimes?
I got to the classroom and he was already sitting there, Kirishima leaned over his shoulder as he played a game on his phone. That only made me feel worse. I walked right past them and sat down, opening my notebook and scribbling lines and circles on a random sheet. When a few more of our classmates walked in, Kirishima left Bakugou's side to chat. Bakugou turned in his chair and stood up, approaching me slowly. He sat in the seat next to me and let out a huff of air.
"You mad at me Icyhot?" He said in a quiet tone.
I looked at him, for a moment while I stared at his adorable face I forgot why I ignored him. He loosened the tension on his eyebrows and softened his expression.
"I'm sorry if you are mad at me, I don't know what I'm doing. You're the first person I've done something like this with… I just don't want to already fuck this up."
I leaned my head on my hand and slid my foot closer to his to tap it and gave him a little smile, "Thanks, I'm sorry too. My old man has gotten me into a funk so I'm just bitchy I guess."
Bakugou glanced around and then stood up, "Meet me on the roof later, okay?"
I nodded and he returned to his desk. A little blush creeped up on my skin. I continued to scribble and waited for class to begin.
After class I hurried to the lunchroom to grab at least a little bowl of soba. I put as much in my mouth as I could and forced it down my throat. I finished what I could and then ran out to the ladder on the side of the building and climbed up. Bakugou was sitting close to the edge waiting for me.
I sat beside him and looked at him. He looked at me.
"Feel better yet?" He asked and I nodded.
"Now I do, it's quiet up here… and there's you," I replied leaning on him.
He chuckled, "You're too soft."
"That's a bad thing?" I said breathing in his scent.
"I didn't say that," He leaned his head on mine.
I sighed, "The last time you and I were both up here you looked like you wanted to kill me."
"Yeah I probably did," He replied.
I looked at his wrist, the cuts were more healed over and started to form scars. I reached over and ran a finger over them.
"How have you been feeling?" I asked softly.
His arm flexed a bit when I touched him, he relaxed when I pulled away, "I don't feel like doing that anymore. I don't know. I think I'm doing fine."
I sat up and looked at him again, "It's okay to have bad days, and you can talk to me whenever you need it."
He nodded, "Yeah I know."
I leaned in and kissed him, which he accepted and kissed back. I put a hand on the other side of his waist and leaned over him so I was more above him. He leaned back more until he pulled me so he could lay and kiss me easier. Another long and warm dance between our mouths and our gentle touches. It made my stomach feel like butterflies.
He pushed on my chest a little and broke our connection, "Come home with me again."
I frowned a bit, "If my dad finds out…"
"Please? Say you're with Deku or some shit, I want you to come with me."
I thought it over. Maybe making an excuse like training with my friends would work. I was still a bit hesitant, but looking at the blond beneath me and the way he stared at me with those red eyes made me decide.
"Alright, I'll come with you," I laid back beside him, resting my head on his arm.
He squeezed my shoulder and kissed the top of my head.
We laid like that for the rest of the lunch hour, and when it was over it was hard to leave. He complained when I tried to get up.
"Bakugou you know we can't stay up here all day, we'll be in deep shit for skipping."
He grumbled and ran a hand through his tangles, "Yeah whatever, I just want to… stay like this."
I stood up and offered him my hand, which he took. We both walked to the side of the roof and I stopped. 
"I'll go down first okay? In case anyone sees…" I said, watching his expression turn frustrated.
"Whatever," He grumbled.
The rest of the day was easier to get through. I'd just stare at the back of Bakugou's head all day, not really paying attention to anything else. I felt myself putting all of my emotions and insecurities on him like he was everything. What terrified me was how fast it was happening. I didn't realize I needed him this much.
When we were released I started to go the route I vaguely remembered the last time I walked with Bakugou to his home. I pulled my phone out and sent a message to my father explaining my "training with Midoriya and Yaoyorozu". When I thought my texts were believable enough I stuck it back in my pocket and glanced behind me to see if my hot head was behind me yet.
He was just leaving the front gates of the academy. His red headed friend next to him, and the yellow head beside him. Bakugou had a tiny smile on his face as the three talked amongst themselves. Kirishima and Kaminari were on a rant on something that I couldn't quite hear. They looked like a sweet trio, making me jealous. He didn't even notice me standing there staring back at him, waiting like some lost puppy. I turned and continued to walk from memory, hoping I'd hear his footsteps nearby. 
Turns out I remembered the entire route perfectly. Each time I'd glance back they'd still be a ways behind me. Kaminari split off from the two when they passed his street, leaving just the two of them. Kirishima was so close to him and Bakugou wasn't tense or pissed off or annoyed or anything. God, it just… it bothered me.
I found Bakugou's home and leaned against the building, waiting for him to show up. I couldn't see him down the street anymore, I'd sped up my walking so I could stop torturing myself by looking back and see that he still hadn't even tried to catch me or anything.
Eventually, I could see the mess of blond hair bouncing with each stride he took while running. He saw me from a distance and waved his hand a little. When he ran up to me and let out some exhales he looked into my eyes.
"Hey, sorry, I was trying to hurry," He said, unlocking the door.
"It's alright," I said quietly, following him inside.
We walked into his room and like always, he shut the door. He turned and looked at me, I couldn't really make eye contact when something was bothering me so I just sat on his bed and focused on setting my things down and removing my jacket. He slid his belt out from the loops and threw it aside, proceeding to push me over on the bed to lay beside me. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me close, my back touching his chest. I closed my eyes and sighed, getting my body to relax.
"Been waiting since lunch for this again," He mumbled into my shoulder.
I didn't reply, I just slid my fingers between his and held his hand close to my stomach.
He moved his head a bit to look down at me, "You okay, Icyhot?"
I nodded, "Yeah, I'm okay."
I could feel him frowning as soon I said that, "Hmm why do I feel like you're lying to me?" He used his finger to turn my face to his.
I swallowed and looked into his red eyes, "I'm okay."
He stared longer, then let go of my chin and leaned back "If you say so, hun."
He flinched at the nickname he blurted out and I smiled at it. He always unintentionally made me go crazy for just about anything he did. I took in another long inhale and let it out just the same. I focused on our breathing with my eyes closed and found myself once again dozing off. His hands ran themselves up my sides and through my hair. His hands were gentle, warm, and exactly what I needed. The perfect spell to throw me right into sleep.