Serendipity |bts | OT7|

Dirty little secret

He was sat at the end on the bed as she slept with his chin resting on his hands trying to think. How did he not notice? After everything, he just took her word for it that the last few dressings on her sternum were for damage done by her father. But here was the truth laid down in front of him. She was hiding the damage she had done to her own body. They had been intimate for the first time in a while that night both way to drunk to notice as clumsy hands dragged over the others skin. And that's when he's sure it happened. He knocked the dressings from her sternum but it was only after when she had fallen asleep and he had come in from the toilet that he noticed the them. Both small and large, both shallow and deep, both angry red and faded white lines all over her torso. Namjoon was right. What should he do? Wake her up and confront her? Tell the boys? Say nothing? There was a light moan from behind him and the mattress dipped as she moved.
"Baby, come back to bed." Her small voice said slowly as she sat up to place her chin on his shoulder placing a loving kiss on his neck.
"Sorry baby I didn't wake you did I?" He asked holding her arms as she wrapped them around his waist.
"No... are you alright?" She said sleepily pressing another kiss to his shoulder, coming to rest there again.
"Yes jagiya... I'm fine." He said looking across at the mirror to see how pretty she looked pressing kisses all over his back, careful to sooth the scratches she had left on him just hours ago. "What are you doing, angel?" She hummed pressing another kiss in between his shoulder blades and smiled against his skin.
"You looked sad. Im just trying to cheer you up." She stated as he reached around pulling he to sit in his lap placing a kiss to her lips.
"You want to cheer me up?" She hummed a yes thinking this may lead to another round of sex but when the words "tell me why you've hurt yourself jagiya." Left his mouth she felt sick. She had been careless, let her self get to comfortable. What could she do now? Lie. Lie your ass off.
"I don't know what you're talking about baby." She said slowly continuing to kiss down his chest until he ran his fingertips over the uncovered skin and she looked down at his hands.
"Don't do that."
"Do what?" She looked back up at him seeing how mad he looked.
"Lie." She stood up walking over to put his shirt on and cover the marks as he spoke. "You lied. You told Namjoon you wouldn't ever. Do you have any idea how relived I was when he didn't find a single mark on you, but it just turns out he was looking in the wrong place." Without saying a word almost ignoring him she walked to the bathroom slamming the door and turning the lock. He walked over at the same time slamming his hands against it as she locked the door. "You better not Luna. Open this door right now." He listening to the silence as she ignored him the other side of the door she was looking at herself on the mirror. The black button up hanging open on her body while she ran her fingers over the scars. "I'll go and get them." He meant Namjoon and Yoongi. She knew that would only make things worse. She wouldn't be able to stand the looks on their faces when they found out. She needed to be numb for this. She routed through her small make up bag finding the sliver rectangle and slipped off the shirt. "Luna, if this door isn't open in 5 seconds-"
"Fuck off tae." She said with a grunt as the razor dragged across her skin. She heard the room door slam and she looked down at her wrist. What if she didn't have to deal with what's about to happen? Just one more and it's all over... she pressed it to her wrist ready to do it when she saw their faces in her head the looked on them as they found her. Stop it. She bring it back to her rib cage and began to cut in a rapid motion just desperate to feel numb an not be filled with thoughts of killing herself. It wasn't enough. Not this time. She needed to go further. Her thigh was the next victim as her legs got weak and she sat down leaning against the wall. She wasn't watching as she did it only listening as the room door opened ans she heard a light knock.
"Princess?" Yoongi. She stopped the razor too out of it to do anything more. "Can you open the door please." She rolled her head back to lean against the wall and thought for a moment. It was more of a demand than a question but the way he said it was so inviting.
"Is joonie there?" She spoke looking around the room as if she was high.
"Yes princess he is." She had a moment where his words flashed through her head I catch you with this again you're in big trouble.
"Don't let him in if you don't think he can handle it." There's was a small whisper and she looked down at the blood with curiosity. How far could she push it before she went to far? All she could feel was her whole body throbbing as she watched. It didn't hurt, not yet anyway. There was a subtle sting to it as she sat with the razor still loose in her hand, her arms had long since dropped to her side and they threatened to not move again. Maybe she had pushed it too much. "Okay I found a way to get the door open. We're coming in now okay princess?" The lock began to turn and she couldn't even hold her head up as it slid open.