Someone asked me what I was looking for, dating?
A relationship? To just be with someone?
And I have never felt as much fear as I have in that moment,
not even performing in front an audience of 600 with blinding lights and lines racing in my mind,
did my stomach churn the way it did then.
I couldn't give them an answer, not a straight forward one at least,
they said I didn't have to give them an answer then
"It was just to start a conversation".
But I haven't heard from them since.
You made me fall in love with you,
finally imagine myself settling down,
so I asked you, I practically begged.
And now I am terrified of anyone having that power over me,
people come into my life with pure intentions and I shake and sob,
wondering what secret or trick they have planned.
Because you left me fearing that if someone claims they care for me it's only to distract me from what they're hiding.
So, how?
How am I ever supposed to be happy when I have you in the back of my mind asking why I think everyone's going to leave me,
as you had already moved on.
How?
How can I ever be happy?
