Where My Demons Hide

Chapter Thirteen - Eagle

I sat on the patio at the seaside restaurant and sipped from my coffee while I waited for Dragon. I knew where he was at that moment—I knew precisely what he had done before as well. He'd stopped by his favorite flower shop, bought some daisies and brought them to my brother's grave. At the moment, I knew Dragon was sitting there, speaking to Win.

Seeing the way he missed my brother, I never knew anyone could love another like that. There weas something almost pure about the way he'd adored my brother. But I wanted him to move on with his life. I knew Win, and there was no way Win would have approved of this.

With a soft breath out my mouth, I opened my book and delved back into the story I'd been trying to finish reading for the past week. But my mind kept playing back and forth between Dragon and Ohm.

Frustrated, I closed the book, set it on the table and lifted my coffee to my lips. I'd never fallen for someone at first sight before. I'd never felt so compelled to know someone either. I wasn't sure what I should call it, and at the moment, I was trying to see if seeing him again would send the same reactions through my body.

Ohm was shy. He'd looked at me as if it was the first time he'd been out with a man. Sure, he said it wasn't a date, but I wanted it to be. Even then, at the end, I wanted to hold him against the car and kissed him. Every part of me wanted to appease that urge—but how could I? I couldn't do that to him.

"You've been waiting long?"

I looked up at Dragon and smiled. Once I'd given him a hug and he'd made his order, I asked for a refill of my coffee and leaned back in my chair, watching him.

"Don't say it." Dragon sighed.

"If you know what I was going to say, why do you keep doing it?" I asked.

"I because I loved him." Dragon replied. "Because he was my first love and I feel lost without him. But there's something that happened and I think it's important, but I'm not sure."

"Okay." I spoke softly. "Tell me."

"At nights, if I sleep in his arms, my nightmares don't affect me."

"Wow." I exclaimed. "I'm no therapist, but I know that's important."

Dragon nodded and paused as we accepted our orders. Once we were alone again, he sighed and picked up his spoon and fork. But he didn't tuck into his meal. He lifted his sad eyes at me. "Told you. I'm just not that kind of man anymore—the one who reads meaning into most things. I think because of that I miss events or moments that are detrimental."

"Don't be so dramatic."

"Dramatic?" He set the utensils down. "How about this for dramatic? When I kiss him all these—these—things flood every part of me. These—emotions are foreign to me. I'm ashamed to say I didn't feel them with Win."

"Makes sense." I explained. "With each person we love, we feel things differently, experience moments differently. We don't love any two person the same."

Dragon sighed. "I'm starting to feel something for someone else and I don't know what to do with that."

"Explore it."

"You're win's brother." I told him.

"And?" Eagle asked. "Yes, I am Win's brother. I knew him better than anyone else. I know he wouldn't want you to torture yourself forever. You've mourned and there's no shame in falling in love again. You're looking for an excuse not to love Star. Why is that? And don't tell me it's because of P'Win."

I sighed. "I'm fighting it because everything I love, I hurt. And what would he do if he found out I'm not as perfect as I should be?"

"Perfect as you should—what does that mean?" Before he could answer, his meaning came to me. "Perfection is overrated, Dragon. If this man loves you, he won't care about that."