𝘕𝘌𝘝𝘌𝘙 𝘌𝘕𝘖𝘜𝘎𝘏 (The Outsiders) ·Dallas Winston· [Unfinished]

Chapter 14

A week later

Dally's POV

I sat in my car in front of Elena's house. I didn't even realize I ended up there, but here I was.

I stared at the light coming from her bedroom. The curtain was halfway closed and but I could see her sitting on her bed.

It was dark out, it being after midnight. She had Tony on her bed in front of her but otherwise she was just sitting there. I wanted to go to her window and climb in like I would normally do which made it harder to just sit there.

Her bedroom door opened and she looked at her brother as he walked in. She then looked to the window and we made eye contact. I let out a sigh and she stood up, closing her bedroom door and coming to the window.

"Dallas," she shouted out the window as she pushed it open. "Dal, what are you doing here?"

I got out of the car and walked to the sidewalk, leaning against the hood of my car.

"Hey, doll."

"You shouldn't be here." She rested her elbows on the windowsill.

"You look good," I said to her.

She looked away. "Dal..."

"I miss you," I pushed myself off the hood of the car. "A lot, Elena."

"I miss you too," she whispered, still not looking at me.

I stepped onto the lawn and walked to her window. She pulled her head back inside as I approached. I rested my arms on the windowsill in place of hers.

We stayed silent as she pulled Tony onto her lap. I smiled seeing them. My favorite part of the day was coming over to see Elena. She'd sit on her bed stroking Tony as we talked. Hate to admit it, but I love that damn cat.

"Tony," I clicked my tongue.

He looked at me and let out a meow. He jumped onto the windowsill and I started petting him.

"Tony missed you too," Elena stood up and walked to us.

I stopped petting Tony and stared at Elena. "Im sorry, babe."

"Don't call me that," she grew upset.

"Babe- I- I mean Elena," I fumbled my words. "Its been weeks."

She looked me in the eyes and I seen tears in them, not yet breaking the surface tension.

"You-" she was angry. Her breath skipped a beat as she suppressed her sobs. "You cheated on me for ten months, Dallas."

"El..."

"Ten months," she sniffed and turned around as the tears finally fell. "You made me look like an idiot for loving you, Dallas. For letting you come home and have sex with me whenever you wanted. For trusting you, for even being with you in the first place."

I couldn't say anything. Even if I could muster up the will to speak, I wouldn't even know what to say. I felt bad. She had her back to me.

"But I love you," she sobbed. She pulled open the drawer to her nightstand. "And this stupid, stupid note."

It was wrinkled like she had balled it up and tried to flatten it again. She looked at me then walked to me and handed it to me.

"Read it to me, Dallas," her hands were shaking.

I stared at the paper, "what?"

"Read the damn note to me." She hit it against my chest. "I want to hear those words come out of your mouth."

"Elena I'm not reading this-"

"Because you don't mean it," she wiped her tears. "I knew you'd say that-"

"No, El," I interrupted. "Because Its not who I am." I snapped. "Thats exactly what the note was trying to say, Elena. Loving you wasn't supposed to happen. Its not who I am and I hated myself and you for letting it happen." I held the note for her to take it. "I can't say that out loud."

She sat on her bed with her arms crossed. She looked away from me as she cried.

"I want to hear it from you." Elena spoke quietly.

"Can I come in?" I asked.

She didn't say anything. She moved over on the bed like she was making room for me so I climbed through her window. I closed the window behind me and Tony jumped on the bed.

I stared at the note, reading over every work I said. I cringed at the vulnerability and sighed, laying back on the pillows. She laid down as well. She had her back to me.

We were silent for a couple minutes. I heard her breathing steadily as she stopped crying. It was almost like she had fallen asleep but she turned her head to look at me.

"Elena," I began reading.

I took a deep breath as she moved her body closer to mine, finally turning over so she was facing me. She rested her head on my shoulder and stared forward at my messy handwriting.

"I know you don't want to hear this. I know you hate me right now and you have every reason to. I just can't begin to tell you how much I miss you."

I looked at Elena and she was still staring at the note. I didn't want to read the note futher. It doesn't sound like me.

"I've had to use everything in me to not come see you today. Its been hard these past couple weeks, but today was worse. I was going to take you to Rozzie's. I was going to let you get all dolled up, and I even was gonna make Darry help me get dressed. I know this means nothing to you because we've broken up, but I just thought you should know what today would have been."

I paused and Elena brought her hand to her face to wipe her tears.

"Elena, I love you. I cheated on you, believe it or not, because I love you. I know you won't understand it. Hell, its hard to even rationalize it myself. But I was scared, El. You and I were going strong for a couple months which scared me. You were new. You treated me like no other girl had. I went into our relationship thinking it was going to be a fun couple weeks before we parted ways. But you understood me, and cared about me. I wasn't used to that. To someone treating me with kindness even when I was being an ass. I wanted to fall out of love with you. I didn't want to be with you. I did, but I didn't. I didn't like the idea of loving you. I thought if I cheated on you, if I spend my nights with other girls that I would stop loving you. That I would get the courage and means to break up with you. That I would soon get tired of you."

Tony walked across mine and Elena's legs, plopping down between us. She brought her hand to Tony and began petting him and I just watched them for a moment before continuing.

"That never happened. I never stopped loving you, I never stopped thinking about you. I never thought even for a second about when I would break up with you. There was no doubt in my mind that you would find out. I knew it would happen, and I was hoping that when it happened a release would come over me. I hoped that when you broke up with me I would easily forget. I would move on and finally be set free from whatever spell you had over me. But I'm still sitting here admitting my unsaid feelings in this letter, and I still love you."

She stopped petting Tony and her arm wrapped around my torso. She cuddled into me and I felt my heart beating out of my chest. It felt like old times. Though we rarely had moments like this, it happened once in a while. And I never would have admitted to enjoying it but I do.

"You may not even have read this. You may have discarded this letter along with the flowers from this morning. But happy anniversary, Elena. I'm sorry.

Dallas."

I finished reading. She looked up at me and I leaned in and kissed her, our lips lingering as she slowly pulled away. I rested my head on the pillow and let out a sigh.

She took the paper and set it on her night stand. I watched her closely as her body was leaned over me. Tony got up, walked across the bed and jumped down. She got up and let the cat out then came back to the bed.

She put her hand on my cheek and kissed my lips. I grabbed her waist and pulled her close as we began making out.